UPDATE!! please? Love it..

Nice story, just one thing. Not sure if you know or not, but Shikamarus dads name is Shikaku not Shukaku. Not sure if that was a typo or not, but I just wanted to point it out for ya. Keep the chapters coming please!

This one is the best. I am now going hrew all ShikaXTema storis and this one rullez rely

LOL That was awsome!keep up the great work!

Interesting story ^^ Would love to see more

Btw, one mistake you keep making: It's 'Sabaku' not Subaku. Just telling ya =)

THAT WAS GREAT!!

I lold. You did so well at this, its great! I asouloutly loved it! I cant wait to find out what happens in the next chapter!

Well nice story so far! Except the first chapter, it suffered from a bit of randomosity, as I call it. Like there are no taxis cars prom etc. But that may have been pointed out.

Anyway, Also Sabaku no is not really a last name. It means "Of the desert" well actually "Of desert" if you wanna be all practical about it. So I guess possibly the clan would be the Sabaku clan. Who knows.

Or maybe, note: this is the part where MY randomosity kicks in*, It was like a forgotten one that is only known by said clan and they just go by Sabaku no _ because they have an EVIL kekki genkai. But who knows? I don't, thats why we have creativity.

Another note: the whole forgotten name thing, that is my idea, I'm using it...

-The Reviewer
OF RANDOMNESS!

Sorry, I didn't understand. Why was he so angry about?

Yay! Thanks for updating. And you got me all wound up for a smooch or a hug or sumpthing after the fight (that was funny by the way). and now I have to wait. pout.

Oh. It's okay. Don't mind me. pout. pout. pout. Go on about your busines...

I LOVE IT!

CANT WAIT FOR MORE!

nice start, I like the setup.

sounds like a great story, cant wait to read the 2nd chapter.

AHAHAHAH! NIce job! this was really good. Wonder what their meeting will be like. keep it up...

That was awsome, I was getting more and more excited as the story progressed. You have a very good writing style.

Some nice things in here, I like your portrayal of their thoughts. Since you seem to want some feedback from your note, I'm going to say a little more--hope that's ok.

I think you could tighten things up a bit by dropping a couple things. FREX: when she thinks about Shika for the first time and the para ends with "little did she know." Seems to me to say more if you leave that thought off.

Also, I like the idea of the scene shifts coming faster and faster at the end, but they kind of got a little distracting. Personally, for me, they slowed down the build to the big reveal in the last couple of lines--partly because the readers already know what's about to happen.

Looking forward to the next installment!