Aww I was hoping Yami would come and save the day.. but that's just too good lol. It's more realistic that way. And aww man that poor girl who saved the day died too? Damn, I mean it waas only the second floor. She could've survived (.

Man I did not know pistols can hold 13 bullets. Though, I'm surprised Kaiba didn't know that... It's funny cuz I just read a fic before this where Kaiba is the psychopathic student who took hostages in a school shooting.

omfg i love it! *favs and reads 5 times ova again*

It is angsty, because of the chain of events. The "sappiness" just seems to accentuate it.

brittney

Really good. I loved it its hard for me to find any storys with Seto being so nice. :)

That was really emotional. I loved it! I reminded me of an episode of One Tree Hill, when Jimmy basically did the same thing. Really well done. Some parts were very disturbing, but when someone does something like that, it is disturbing.

Good Job. I loved it!

Natalie

Simply amazing, it was frightening, and you had me in tears, I thought he was gonna kill the chibi!

hm... I like the idea. I honestly think you could have dragged the hostage situation out longer, or done more with Koiji. Instead of him just killing students, you could have mde the readers hold their breath wondering if Yugi was going to make it. The police could have gotten involved etc. I think you could ahve done more with this story then you did.

I also think that you should get a beta. There were many places where you wrote either the wrong tense of the word or the wrong word all together.

Kaiba is also very ooc in this. He is normally more in control in this kind of situation. It is in his personality and character. So personally I didn't like that part about it. I think you should put that as a warning at the beginning of the story along.

I like the overall idea, but I think that if you add more detail, get a beta, and spruce it up a bit, it could become heartbreaking, and make the reader panic. I think it would make it better.

I hope that you aren't offended by my review, but take it into account, because I'm trying to help you improve yourself, and help you become a better writer. Thank you. If you have any questions feel free to pm me I would be glad to answer them.

Twiny

Aside from the grammar mistakes and repeated/missing words, that was a very good story. You often put "you're" instead of "your" so maybe a once-over for proofreading purposes would be a good idea. Still, great story (plenty angsty... As the current Mistress of Angst on AarinFantasy forums, I commend you for a job well done) and it's going in my favorites.

that was really intense...borderline scary. (there are far too many of those kind of things that happen for real.) Though, I have to say that Kaiba and Yugi were awesome. And I'm glad that Yugi lived...there are stories like this that would have ended with Yugi's death. Very well written, you should be proud.

Wow, hey, really awesome writing. It's not often I've seen school shooting fics around here, but it's definately a point of interest. Very well done.

WOW

that was amazing! (i read it earlier but i couldnt review at the time, sorry! ) - this fic is so absolutely awesome! you write angst so well too (and some of those scenes and descriptions were horrifyingly realistic, very very well written -) - i just love this fic, and your writing is improving all the time and so rapidly (you'll be the best writer in the world very soon at the rate your going -) i really loved it, very impressive piece of writing and an interesting idea too, i never would have thought of these characters in this kind of situation, very original - i'll stop waffling now (you have to know how brilliant this fic is, and how great a writer you are -)

(oh, and i leave tomorrow, i'll email when i get back and expect a postcard too k -) - have fun (and please please be safe - especially given the various situations not unlike the one in this fic that seems to follow you around all the time -)

... really great fic -

I wasn't going to read this, but then I really got into it. I'm glad Yugi didn't die!

I think it was brilliantly written. I love the fact that Kaiba is thinking of ways to take the guy down, but it's Yugi who realizes when he'll run out of bullets. This needs a sequel. Personally,(I don't know your preferences, I'm just saying what I see.)I think this is a very good set-up for a Seto/Yugi fic, either slash or just friendship. I know Bakura was also in the room, but you have to admit, Kaiba and Yugi shared the experience in a powerful way. I would love to see more of this.

I loved it. I'm glad they all survived. Poor Yugi, the only one who knew who he was got hurt the worst. Of course, I'm not counting the ones who died they suffered more but are at peace now. The others have to live with this.

I absolutely love this story.. I have one question, this kind of reminded me of One Tree Hill, when Jimmy held the students hostage, is this what you based your story on? Great Story...