I thoroughly enjoyed this story. I have added it to my favorites! This is a theme I absolutely love: I have written two stories myself about Susan's life after the train accident so your plot is one I especially admire on a personal level. The fact that she awoke in Aslan's Country provided a touching ending--I was really moved by the epilogue. (The appearance of Reepicheep was great...I wasn't expecting him to be included so that was a nice addition.) Congratulations on posting a very good story.

I like your style of writing. You seem to know how to balance it all to avoid too much of one thing or too little of another. The details are very good. Your reader isn't overwhelmed by them yet you provide enough to give us a clear picture of the scenes.

Good job on this!

Jeffrey
Narnia Fan Fiction Revolution (NFFR)

Beautifully written. It really makes me happy that Susan is reunited.

This is a wonderful, exhilarating ending to Susan's story. It's great to watch her come home at last, and to be with her siblings and also her husband and parents--thus bringing her Narnian life and her earthly life together. Aslan's words about how she has lived a good life and "made hope from despair" are especially meaningful. Good job!

This is a fearsome chapter--as it should be--but Aslan's entry into it makes everything work out. I'm so glad you described him visiting Susan. It's great how you show that Aslan's love for Susan was undiminished by his anger at her behavior. You did a beautiful job of showing the way his promise to her set her free to live a full life.

a wonderful fic. well done!

Cheer up, Su!
That was a very final ending. I wonder if Susan's kids will keep the books...ha, and then one of them will be named C.S. Lewis and he will officially write them down...but that's getting ahead of myself. Excellent story!

So lovely! You've moved me to tears again with this ending. I love how you have Susan waking up in Aslan's Country, surrounded by familiar and admiring faces. I'm glad that she had a good life and a loving family of her own, and that in the end they're all reunited. Her hesitation to face her siblings is a nice parallel to Edmund facing them after he was rescued by Jadis.

All in all, a very beautiful, satisfying and uplifting story. Thank you!

I hope the epilogue is coming soon! I absolutely love this story, it's one I've been searching for ages!

This was a great and vivid chapter - the start of very mono-tone and noir and when Aslan arrives it's as if the scene bursts to life. Aslan's unending love for Susan came shining through in every word and gesture after he banished her nightmares. For all the horror and gore at the start, this was quite a gentle and comforting chapter. Aslan's explanations of what happened and why was beautifully presented. I liked how Aslan didn't reprimand Susan but simply agreed with her assessment of her conduct and let her know - without any anger - that he was angry with her. You've left me with a sense of great hope and promise.

*applauds* I like the discussion between Aslan and Susan. Accidents are NOT punishment, and you explained that beautifully. The dream was gruesome, but not in a bloody/gory way. It was stark, like seeing something in black and white pictures. You only feel the echo of the actual accident.

Nicely handled, if a little dark at first. I never thought much about Susan after the accident where nightmares were concerened. But this presents a good idea, and allows her to come back to her faith.

I'd almost say poor thing. . . but I'm nasty. Still, those nightmares sounds just horrid.

wonderful.
Until next week!

kay

Loved, LOVED the idea of the three having lots and lots of friends, much to Susan's surprise. Next to her 'friends', Susan begins to really contemplate herself more deeply, and it works very well.

‘In heaven with God?’ she thought, ‘No, I hope they’re with Aslan.'

I love this line. It so perfectly sums up the change in Susan and the love that all of them felt for Aslan, Susan included. It's sad that it takes so much loss for her to see the world clearly, but at least she sees again.

"Even in death they protected her."

Beautiful line.

Wow.

Poor Susan. She is the Pevensie I have the hardest time understanding, probably because the idea I had as a little girl is still in my head. "Why would someone /willingly/ forget such a wonderful place as Narnia?"

I don't think I liked how she hurt her siblings either. But this is doing such a good job of getting into her head. *grins* wonderful wonderful.

Keep it up!
Kay