eheh, doon's horny. and that amuses me in a strange and obnoxious way.

I liked how this story was laid out. No I don't know anything about "The City of Ember," but I appreciate the descriptive nature of your writing so I ventured to read this. Plus as you know T ratings invoke interest from me. I decided to read other stories from your works whilst I await the next update on your latest Naruto story.

Having described a long time friendship between these two characters their union is touching. It sounds like they came to an end of the world type experience, so with newfound love and a hope for the future, it ended very nicely.

I loved it! Great Job! :)

Wow, Doon-the-loon has some nerve there.

Aw, that's sweet. Not to mention a great ending and I've got to agree with you, The Ember Series had nothing like this which I think made a lot of people angry/sad/etc.

Aww that's sweet!

About time for some proper Doon/Lina. XD Nice one-shot. :P

Nice. I'd always thought about it. You should do a sequel with a sex scene-with the characters a bit older, of course. They're both like 13. But nice story. I hope the next book in the series has something similar to this.

The last few lines make me want to die inside from happiness. Thank you, thank you for writing them. ;)
Outstanding.

Ooh! hehe ;) I love it. I also love the double entendre in the title X3

I really liked this, the only thing I found a little out of place is that the first time they kiss, or second I guess, he's already planning on that? Still I like this.

O! I believe that THIS deserves a Sequel! I hope it as one!

i think the author of the city of ember saga will write more and have them end up together...X3 Cant w8!

That was really sweet

... I'm sorry, that made me giggle a little.
great job!