Nice hope you get more up soon

haha i like it! i just realized you could do game fanfics and M&B is one of my favorites )

I REALLY like it. I like the beginning a lot. Its very true to the game. Please write more... I might have to out write you if you dont! lol

8/10!

I'm glad to see this type of story, since I've been wanting to write one for a while. You have a few spelling/grammar mistakes, but nothing really bad. The only real thing is that I think you could go a bit easier on the geography. People like you and me know where this stuff is, but generally it's better to let the readers imagine it for themselves.

I realize this review is a couple months too late, but...

It is a wonderful game, and not at all conducive to making good grades, (or making it to class at all, for that matter).

But... there's two fics... each with one chapter. If you have ideas, then keep writing. The game leaves so much room for it, and I'd love to read more fics.