Your writing style is improving! Keep up the hard work. I look forward to seeing what you have for us next. :)

The idea was sweet, but I think your execution could use some work. First of all, you are not writing in complete sentences and there are many punctuation errors. These are simple issues that any good beta would be glad to help you with.

Secondly, I would sugest that you have your characters actualy do things rather than just talk about the characters doing things. Instead of saying "The goblins were very excited" say something more like "The goblins jumped up and down, cheering wildly."

Also, please never say anything like "He was so bored to death" every again in a story, unless it's in the dialog. "He was bored to death" wouldn't be great, but it would be better. Even better might be something like: "He rapped his fingers against the arm of his throne and sighed heavily. Everthing had been so dull, he reflected, since the last Runner had left. Even the golbin's antics could not keep him entertained."

On a less technical note, Jareth is out of character compaired to the movie, and I know that this is a fanfiction, but please try to give more of a reason for the way he is acting. Maybe he is actually a very kind person who loves children and only acted crule to Sarah because that was his job, or something like that, but you have to explain that to set up the story.

Also, Jareth lives in the underground, so you may want to explain why he celebrates Christmas (a very Chirstian holiday) most especially if he is a Fae, as you suggested. Fae are creatures of celtic myth, so they would proabably be Pagan (likely Wiccan), and would thus celebrate Yule instead of Christmas (although this is a mistake that many fanfic writers make).

I think the idea of Jareth being an Underground Santa Clause is a very sweet, and your writing clearly shows that you have the imaginative potential to be a very good writer. It is true that you have a lot of things you could work on, and I hope my review helps you become a better writer. I look forward to seeing you progress in the future.

Merry Chirstmas, Happy Yule, and Blessed Be
)O(

Aw that was sweet