 Skyyler 2008-12-12 . chapter 1Hey good first chapter! Good detail, and I love the advanture that's already beginning to start! The 'Call'.
Concerns: Oogwai is spelled Oogway.
If you're going to pue 'ass' in your story, rate it 'T'.
Other than that, you're good! No grammar or spelling junk in there... and... YEAH! Have fun writing, and i can't wait to read more!!
-Skyy. |