Yay! a Deep BLue romance story!

You used REBORN! WOW! Absolutley no-one uses it even thought it's the correct one!

Praise on your TMM knowlege my freind!

GREAT JOB!!

Oh, my God, that was such a saddening piece of confused pairings... I actually believed Deep Blue was there aswell until she realized it was all an illusion... did you win the competition? This rocks!

friggin' finally

i love this coupling :)

not only did it make me blush to high heavens, but it was just so well written. darling, you never ceased to impress me.

What a haunting story that leaves you thinking! They would make an interesting couple, you are correct... though I somehow can't really imagine them together (like standing side by side, and that wouldn't be possible because he's "dead"). I'm too freaked out by Deep Blue to even think about that. XD;

It left me with shivers running up my arms. The detail you put into the story was really great, too! I felt like I was actually in the decrepit old church. Loved reading it. C:

I wish you the best of luck in the contest!

You know, one of the few things I liked about Mew Mew Power (besides the one scene where they made Minto think of Zakuro when all the others were thinking of boys, which will always be my favorite dub moment) was the suggestion that Zakuro was some sort of cool Dark Magical Girl before joining the team. Your fic reminded me of that in a lot of ways, except, y'know, yours was well-written.

I also like that you didn't try to show the start of their relationship. That's usually the biggest hurdle with crack pairings, but you nimbly avoid it by treating Zakuro's hallucination-inducing obsession with DB as an established thing.

What I like most about this story, though, is the mood. You know I love me some darkfic, and the atmosphere in this one was just absolutely perfect. You used a good balance of description and thoughts/dialogue, and I quite liked your inclusion of the definitions of your title. They could have been quite jarring, but I think they were an ingenious way to partition your fic, and they even made it sort of... scholarly, somehow, as though I were reading this in a big old dusty book instead on my laptop. That's how freaking immersive your atmosphere was.

The only error I noticed was that at one point you describe a "cooing owl." That's not really the sound owls make, but this is a very minor concern and didn't much distract me from your lovely story. You did a great job with this couple.

erm...strange...I love your wrting style though. Splitting i up into three parts with the three definitions of the word, that's really cool! :)

Wow... this is really good. Better then mine... well I haven't started my yet X3

That was really good. Good Luck.

~IP~