Ah, well now...where do I begin?

First of all, I loved this fic. I had a sneaking sensation that somebody was going to die (my money was on Sam) but Dean was certainly unexpected. And the way he died was just... wow. That guy just doesn't get a break. I also loved how everyone got all commando. Building armies, rushing in, guns a-blazing, the whole shebang. Awesome.

Now with that said. Despite you had me crying (damn you!) I still feel there's a lot left unexplained here. Now I know since you probably don't want to make your own assumptions about certain things (The demon's true reason behind Sam) it just felt like, "Oh Dean's dead. Show's over!" kind of feeling. So the seals are safe simply because Alastair and Lilith were captured? It's a bit hard for me to describe what I'm trying to get across here.

It feels like they won the battle, but not the war. Although this fic was crazy awesome- it felt like it could be BIGGER. Crazier. I mean, you had Dean and Sam seperate, going off to other sides of the world, then suddenly coming right back. I felt jipped out of a European crazy adventure. It's as if Voldemort was killed in the second Harry Potter book. Now what the heck are we suppose to do for the rest of the series? You set it up, but then decide not to knock it down- you just move to the one next to it.
Y'know? Am I making any sense? But don't get me wrong. Loved the fic. Loved the drama. Glad to know it ended happy. Sorta.

I've read a lot of death fics in this fandom (I have no idea why, I'm a sucker for torture, I guess) but this is the first that made me CRY. It wasn't the sadness of the moment that did me in, but rather, Dean's relief and his happiness at finally being able to let go. I completely agree with you that Dean was completely crapped on during S4, and it was really painful to watch someone who beats himself up so relentlessly on the inside get beat up from the outside, as well. It's like reverse validation, or something. Hopefully things will get better.

Also, the FACE! I wasn't sure you were going to go there, but you did, and it was appropriately horrific and I had to block it out of my mind. Kudos though, because I think it would take some courage to write something like that.

Ah, you made me cry again! I hesitated at first 'cause I had a feeling that this tragedy would turn into a death fic... I don't usually do death fics. Then I though, what the heck, and started reading. I've enjoyed your stories before so I couldn't just not read this. I loved the use of memories! I also thought that young Sam noticing the spirits of adult Sam and Dean was very cool. I'm kinda against the brothers being separated (sort of) permanently like this but I ended up liking it here 'cause you handled it appropriately, made it believable. And the thought of Dean stuck with his nightmares, deaf and blind, was terrifying after you revealed that it had been the worst torment for him. Like the Trickster once said: "Sometimes you just gotta let people go." The brothers' bond was genuine and palpable. And you potrayed Castiel well, too. Thanks for the heartbreaking read!

Honey, I cant tell you how much I love this story. My poor English fails me. Just I really want to translate it into Chinese and post it on so some other Chinese spn fans can read it. Please, may i do that?

Thank you.

All I can say (through my tears, no less) is BRAVO! This story is so fabulous. I am literally typing and crying. I loved the way you wove in the Impala ride with the ending, I loved the way you wove in some backstory and made it fit with the current situations.

Adding to memories and going to pimp this story out to some friends on my LJ, if you don't mind.

Fantastic. :-)

Just read your entire story in one day. Started it this morning and came back to it after work. It is amazing. You handled the ending so very well, taking a tragedy and allowing the reader to see the good part of it and appreciate the relationship between the brothers. The part where Sam wonders why time doesn't stop when you've lost someone really struck a chord in me and you have perfectly captured those feelings so well on the page. A great story and thank you for sharing it! Loved it (even though it made my heart hurt)!

I just can't get over how well done this was! You are a truly talented writer! I could actually FEEL every moment of the story, and the ending was absolutely perfect. The characters were spot on. The plot flowed smoothly.
So, wow, just, wow! I'm speechless! I even almost cried- unheard of for me.
This is by far one of the best fan fics I have ever read... on this entire site!
If the writers of Supernatural were looking for the perfect ending to the series, I think they should come look this up and air it!
I honestly can't give any higher praise than that.
Perfect. Absolutely perfect.

At first don't know whether want to read or not. In the end decided want to find out how you gonna end it.

Sad to let Dean go but he's is in peace.
The scene in the Impala between Young Sam & Young Dean where their older version sitting in the back is sad and beautiful.
Dean showing Sam where he let Sam go on with his life without guilt and live it to the fullest and Sam letting Dean go so heartbreaking to me. Dean could fly didn't he hate flying but nice touch there. ;)
Dean such an awesome brother.
One thing though what happen to Ruby?

Like the continuity of your fic, sort of fill in the weeks between epi.

But since I did watch epi 15 & 16, showing Dean at the breaking point, he's kinda need a boost from Sam but Sam is missing the whole point. Where Dean unwavering belief the good in Sam, Sam is doubting Dean strength to pull trough.
hm, could you write some brotherly moments between them, could you?

If not mistaken you've got 2 fic to work on right?
Couldn't wait.

One more thing, I know rambling here, but if you could write some of Dean solo hunts and Dean & John moments it would be awesome.
Love some Dean & John, where John showing his fatherly side.

I knew I should have checked for an update earlier! I’m so glad I kept on reading this fic despite the character death warning. It’s been such a rewarding experience. The death was handled beautifully, and even though I was crying by the end, it was still so good (Or actually, it was so good I was crying). I know I mentioned how great you write sibling relationships, but the way you write the other relationships on the show were just as believable. I especially loved how Castiel was able to give the support Sam needed without being preachy. And yes, I think your sense of his humor was spot on. Castiel was able to laugh at Dean’s “Tet Offensive” remark in “It’s the Great Pumpkin…” after all.

I’m definitely looking forward to your new fic. The premise is intriguing, and I’m already fascinated by Paul Reade and his visions. Thanks again for sharing your wonderful stories, please keep writing (and update soon)!

Ha, I got a mention! ^.^ But it really is something that I think I enjoy reading almost as much as you enjoy writing- the religious aspects add a depth to your stories that I'm hard pressed to find elsewhere. Not to mention that you write the boys issues with faith(struggles with or lack there of) so wonderfully.

My favorite part:

“I told Dean before,” Castiel said, “That there is no imagining my Father's capacity to love, to give, to forgive, especially those who loved and gave as freely, and those who sought remorse. He is well where he is. When I told you to see him home, I meant what I said.”

Perfect, beautiful paragraph. I don't think I could have asked for a better reassurance that Dean was truely safe. You also pulled no punches here- his death is going to take a brutal, painful toll on Sam. He knows this, Bobby knows this, Castiel knows this.(His portayal was excellent- I think most of us feel he has a sense of humor in him somewhere) But the one remaining Winchester is not without hope. He knows where his brother is now, and he knows that it is possible to reach him. After all, his brother went to Hell for him- I think Sam can walk that careful line for a lifetime. I applaud this fic. Tremendous job.

That being said, the snippet for Heaven and Earth sounds extremely intriging, and open, shut should be a great flushing out of those flashbacks. I honestly cannot wait : ) Take care!

I thoroughly enjoyed this story. You made Dean's death, acceptable, peaceful and palatable.

I agree with you, sometimes I feel so much weight on Dean, you just wonder if ending it all would be the best thing. Things never get easier, he never catches a break.

I chuckled and then groaned that I remember having the 45 (that's a record ;) of the original song, Last Kiss. Always made me sad -- so I stopped listening.

Thanks again -- and I loved the preview.

This was honest to God, the best work I have read in a long time. YOU ARE A GENIUS. It was so beautiful and sad (I cried!)and just generally well done. I especialy enjoyed the way you portrayed the brothers dynamics towards each other,(btw pure GENIUS)! Please continue to write more fanfics, perhaps one were both of them live? Once again, Amazing work!!

I am still not too sure why I like Deathfic so much, but I do. Perhaps because its so rare :)

Thanks for the awesome resolution chapter and great fic. I'm holding thumbs that Show doesn't go this route AT ALL but yeah, this is what fanfic is for.

I enjoyed the final conversations between Sam and Bobby and Sam and Castiel. Excellent characterisation as always!

Can't wait for the next one

You warned us...and I am still here crying my eyes out. This story was every bit as wrenching as I expected it to be, and it was beautiful. In reality, we all need to let go. In the SPN world? As 'healthy' as it should be, I never want to see it. If one brother goes, I want the other to follow. I can't stand to see them apart, but if it had to happen, I hope it would be as well-portrayed as you have shown here.
Lovely and yes, very agonizing story, but well-written and engrossing...I couldn't NOT finish it once I'd started. Thanks so much for sharing, and look forward to reading more from you!

Thank YOU for creating and posting this wonderful tale. I, myself, have never been aversed to Dark!Fic - and I truly enjoy it when it has a purpose, point, moral and satisfying ending. All of your fictions just bring the characters to life for me - I can see, hear and FEEL each moment as it passes - and as a reader, this is what I live for.

I am Wiccan (though an ex RC) and while my experiences with the Church haven't been the best - your loving, detailed and masterful depictions of Faith fit ANY religion - whether it be Jehovah, Yahweh, Muhammed or Herne the Hunter. THIS is how it should be - it rings true, speaks to the heart - and truyly shows the capacity for love and forgiveness that should be in EVERY religion.

Your Castiel was fantastic - your Dean, Bobby - well ALL of them, SPOKE to me, as they always do in your tales - and once again, I thak you for a wonderful read that I fully intend to enjoy again and again.

I personally feel that Dean's recent confessions, depression and horror of what he'd done is truly classic Dean. I think he has placed to much upon himself AGAIN - and in his condition (just raised, vulnerable and frightened) he is susceptible to the buffeting emotions and judgements that swirl around him. It's almost like he WANTS Sam, Castiel and Bobby to fear and hate him - that way he feels more at 'home'. Think how frightening being back on topside must be after your lifetime and THEN some in endless torment? Wonder if he even thinks it is all a dream to be yanked away at Alistair's whim.

Speaking of - I found your depiction of him to be chilling, fascinating and horribly, terribly 'accurate' on how this character must have been! He just seems so TRUE (despite what little we see of him!) - this is the perfect personality to place against Dean, as you can see how his indifference and glee at inflicting untold terrors upon his victims would eventaully wear Dean down...

*Laughs*

DARN - longest review I've EVER given...and you can kinda tell I love Dean, right? It's the justification, isn't it?

*Hugs you*

Thank you, thank you, thank you. Your words are a balm, a revelation and a joy to the senses...

Your biggest Fan~
Mandy

(Seriously, if you wrote a book that they were charging 6 dollars for - I would pay 12, no joke!)

*Extra Smishes*