Ok, seriously? Don't listen to what those horrible reviewers are saying. They're just being mean. Yes, the writing wasn't fantastic, but you got your point across and I thought it was very cute. I am a huge fan of this movie, and a hardcore shipper of Jim/Selena, but I didn't feel like this was a betrayal of their relationship, or child abuse, for that matter. That's just a ridiculous accusation. This wasn't a romantic story. It's ok for Hannah to have a crush on Jim, that's normal, and it's not like it's unheard of for an older guy (and Jim was what, like, 20? And Hannah was about 14, not that much younger) to be nice enough to do that for her. It was slightly cliche, but I thought it was cute.

Aw how adorable! I loved it. It put a smile to my face haha

*facepalm*

Jim is in love with Selena. Jim, a grown man, would not kiss a teenage girl. Your grammar and writing needs work. Also, spouting "no mean reviews!" in your summary only attracts us. ;)

-Elodie

Okay, first off the bat, there's no description, the lines just run almost the same as a transcript (that's not good, by the way).

Secondly, the dialogue itself is out of character. Jim just asks to kiss Hannah, despite the fact that he's (apparently) in love with Selena? He has no thoughts on the fact that he's committing child abuse? No sense of guilt for her father's sake? I'm not saying that its not possible to have romantic fluff between the two of them, but it would have to be handled very carefully.

Lastly, and perhaps most importantly, if 'mean' reviews are unwelcome, you have no business writing fiction. Constructive criticism is how writers improve. If you can't handle that, you shouldn't be writing at all.

Aw! I can't stop smiling!

A little cheesy, Yes. But

very cute none the less.

Simple and effective. Very cute.

hehe. That was adorable! Please write more Jim/Hannah stories!

While it's a cute concept, it was executed poorly with uncharacteristic forced dialogue and minimal description. General sentence structure is unappealing as well.

Also, this exact type of fluff has been done before, and better.

haha, I ejoyed this:D

A great story. Very funny.

That was really cute. I liked hannah's character and wished they had done more with her. Great job!

Awe, that was cute!

Who taught you how to write? A drunken two-year-old?

This steaming heap of garbage could be written by an illiterate illegal immigrant and still be better.

Please, delete this and pray to your deity for forgiveness.