|Reviews for Concealed Scars|
| Conjuring Rain 4/8/13 . chapter 1
Oh, I really liked this. I like how you wrote it too. It was very enjoyable to read.
| Renohan 1/2/13 . chapter 1
Excellent! I could honestly feel Amy's emotions there as she unleashed her feelings. What a great portrayal and well written! It was really impressive. Keep it up!
| sonamylover111 10/21/12 . chapter 1
awwwwwwww thats so cute XD this is so much like amy i could even see it happening XD :P
| Darks8728 8/4/12 . chapter 1
Wow, this story was very emotional. I feel really bad for Amy...true, Sonic's been pretty rude to her all these times (especially in Generations). Why can't he stop to realize that she really cares about him?
I really love how you ended the story. It doesn't need to be continued; the important thing is that Sonic does care, and that Amy doesn't have to run away from him. Although, I'm still pretty mad at Knuckles and Tails. Tsk...the youth don't understand, do they?
Beautifully written as always. :)
| Guest 7/5/12 . chapter 1
Darn it! I really hoped someone would die in this story. T_T. I hate you all.
| red-ysetgo 1/5/12 . chapter 1
Hi again. Why haven't I reviewed this yet? XD
First, off I must say I love how you write shipping stories. It's so unique. Instead of all the other romantic slop (which I don't like but don't hate either) on here or dA, it explores issues with relationships and character. It seems more... realisitc that way. Relationships happen, but they're not always perfect like how I see them in so many other stories. It takes time and character developement.
Ahem... On with the story! :D
The word was an exhale of terror, two syllables that I wasn't even sure had come from my own mouth. If there was screaming around me, I didn't notice. Somebody could have put a knife in my shoulder and I wouldn't have noticed.
I was petrified to the spot. My vision suddenly became limited – very limited. I could only see him. Tails and Knuckles no longer existed. They had been wiped off the face of the earth. My earth, anyway. For that long, torturous moment – which in reality was not too long at all – my eyes were for Sonic's body only.
Sonic's bleeding, still body…
What a way to start it off! Intense, sudden and in character. :)
Love how several of these lines have their own paragraph. Gives it more impact. :)
Also, the line where Amy says someone could've put a knife in her shoulder and she wouldn't have noticed is great. Powerful.
Someone who had seen Sonic once or twice in his or her life would not even recognize him now. He… was hardly even blue anymore. Where there wasn't blood, his fur was caked with dirt and dried mud from getting slammed into ground time after time after time…
Oooh... Great way of descibing things. Poor Sonic. (I can just see that)
I had to see him. I had to see him.
Love how you repeated the line. :)
And then I was peering down into his face, which happened to be relaxed – far too relaxed. No… I thought, and my mental dictionary shrunk itself until only that single word could fit. No… no no no. No. No.
OOH! XD Love the lines here. Nice.
He was the only person I had ever loved. People always thought it was a silly teenage infatuation, that it wasn't real, genuine, mature love. Or perhaps they thought I just wanted to date the superhero. But after three years, he was still the only one who ever made my heart ache when I looked into his eyes. After three precious years, after I had turned fifteen, I knew I could trust myself when I said, 'he's the only one for me.'
D'awwww... "melts" I adore the way you said, "heart ache when I looked into his eyes." Aw. So cute and well done. And something that is true and that bothers me is that many people indeed do see it as ditsy, fangirl love or just wanting to be with the hero. No. I see it as geniune love. :)
Could I keep my emotions in check long enough to help, or would I break down?
AW. Great character here. :)
I felt my eyes widen, and, as I stared into his torn up face, I knew the image would remain etched into my memory until the day I died.
XD Nice wording. Really stark and hard hitting.
It had never been this bad. Never. Eggman had succeeded in outsmarting him, outrunning him, and overpowering him. For a brief moment, my ridiculous optimism faltered; was he actually… was he… actually…
OMG. Love how it trails off. :)
Sonic's eyes had opened, and he had cried out in… surprise? Fear? Agony? I didn't know.
Aw. Poor Sonic.
. "No! Don't try to get up…" I got on my knees and placed my hands on his shoulders, trying to push him back down from his sitting position. "You're really hurt, Sonic! Take it easy… just lay down…"
Love her concern for him. Aw.
"Sonic," another voice called. Both Sonic and I whipped our heads around. It was Tails. Behind him, Knuckles was holding off Eggman's newest E-series robot. "Hey, Sonic, you all right over there? That was quite a blow!" The fox said.
"I'm okay, bro, thanks!" Sonic hollered back with a thumbs-up. I looked back at him then.
Nice dialogue. :)
And I saw everything in a different light, quite literally.
The dimness of the dark sky had made Sonic's condition look worse than it was in actuality, and now that he was moving around, I could see that his wounds weren't deep. His fur was dirty, too, but not nearly as bad as the light (coupled with my overactive imagination) had made it look.
He was fine.
Aw. Poor Amy.
He had thanked Tails earlier when he had gotten hurt; why not me? I cared about him, too.
watched him exchange a glance with Tails, who had that here-we-go-again look in his eyes, and Knuckles, who looked extremely amused. I shook my head in disbelief. None of them took me seriously. None of them thought I actually cared about him – they just thought I wanted to get him in my house. And they had no idea… how hard it was… for me to make that offer.
Aw c'mon guys. Poor Amy.
"Every single time!" I exploded. "Every time, this is what I get! News flash, Sonic: I actually care! Every time you get injured, every time you're in a bad mood, Sonic, I feel your pain! And I want to do everything I can to make you happy… that's all I've ever wanted…"
I began to cry openly. I didn't know what their faces looked like anymore, as I couldn't see past my own ocean of tears. I didn't care. "But you never reciprocate! You never… you never even thank me for anything! Sonic, you care about every other person in the world but me! That's what I've always loved you for, is how selfless you are and how brave you are… but now I understand… none of it applies to me, does it? Does it…?"
I adore the dialogue, and how Amy isn't afraid to speak her mind. :) Great character here. :)
P. S. (Those are the qualities that make me love him too. ;))
"I don't chase you… to be a p-pest, you know… I just want to sp-spend some time with you now and then. Know why I hug you every time I get a chance? 'C-cause… I never know when I'll have another chance after that. That's… that's why. If… if you would just stop and talk to me maybe once a week… if you'd just give me a chance… you might actually like me, Sonic. What is it? Why don't you like me? Why don't you care about me, too?"
AW. Love the "I never know when I'll have another chance." So true.
I blinked, and saw that his head was bowed slightly. I wondered if it was remorse.
"You would realize… that I love him so much more than you c-can imagine. Despite the way he treats me… I don't give up on him! So, Sonic—" I addressed him directly, meeting his nervous gaze "—if that's not love, what is?" I didn't even wait for an answer.
AW. I adore this. It's so sweet and heart warming.
If he really is a hero… he'll be my hero too. If he really does feel bad, he'll follow me. He can catch me; he's fast enough. But… if he doesn't care, I don't want to be there to see his reaction. So… sayonara, Sonic the—
I adore her inner thoughts here. :) And the callback to SA2. Intentional?
"Hey." His calm, confident voice pierced through the wind and reached my sensitive ears, and almost immediately euphoria exploded within my being. That one single word… unless I was only dreaming it… it had to be the most beautiful thing I had ever heard.
I came to a halt and turned around, tears still streaming down my face. And there he was… the only love of my life. My hero, after all.
:) Nice ending that leaves things open to the reader.
I really like how you use and exploit Sonic's less positive character traits in this, all while keeping it in character. That is something seriously lacking in the shipping fanfics department. So many authors make things perfect, to the point where it's out of character.
Nice work. :)
| Tailsfan55 7/19/11 . chapter 1
I think you expressed Amy's love for Sonic, super well! Even though I'm a boy, I still have always enjoyed love stories like this. I guess I'm just a big softy.
| dib07 7/7/11 . chapter 1
Wow. So direct and SO powerful. I can completely understand Amy's point of view, and the building, renting frustration that you can clearly see from Sonic X from her, yet the show never expanded upon.
You give me the motiavtion to improve. Your writing style is unique, addictive and like no other. The only problem I have is that I wish the chapter was longer! Then again, that might have destroyed the magic.
| Dreamweaver the Writer 1/13/11 . chapter 1
Aw! This is so sweet! I really like the things you brought out in Amy. I felt so in line with her, and it seemed totally in character for her. I know she doesn't normally get down or upset the way she does here, but I think in context her outburst makes complete sense. So good. Love it! :D
| SilverDawn2010 7/3/10 . chapter 1
I first wan to apologize for faving this and not leaving a review, as that's a big pet peeve of mine (I figure, if you like something enough to fave it, you should be able to put together at least one coherent sentence about it, right?) but it was late when I read this and didn't think I could give you a proper review. But now I can. ;)
First of all, it's been a while since I read something made me shed tears as much as this did. I've now read it twice, and I cried just as much as the first time. There was something about when Amy offered Sonic some kindness, and Tails' and Knux's reactions (and Sonic's, of course), and how Amy said they never took her seriously...that's something I never thought of before, but that's very true. Amy has always been a bit of a tagalong, a bit annoying to the three guys, and I'm sure she's hurt being treated like that.
But that's not all. When she said that she really, honestly truly cared about Sonic and wanted to offer him some comfort, but the others thought she was trying to get him into her house...it just touched me deeply.
The real kicker, however, was when Amy said, "You care about everyone else but me." That sentence started the waterworks, and the rest of the story was read with blurry vision. Every single thing she said was true, and I could picture it vividly.
And don't get me wrong, there are plenty of scenes like this, where Amy yells at Sonic's (seeming) carelessness, but this one for some reason stands out to me among all the others I've read.
And the ending...it was a little bittersweet, and I liked it. Of course, Sonic's not going to let one of his best friends run off crying like that, so he goes after Amy, and she couldn't be happier. The only thing I didn't like is that you ended it right there. I would have liked to see Sonic say something else, just to make it more heartwarming. I don't know if you were looking for that effect, but having Sonic go after her after that tearful outburst warmed my heart.
But then again, I'm sort of torn, because you left it open ended what Sonic would go on to say, and that can be a good thing. As a diehard SonAmy fan, I'd like to think that Sonic confessed that he loves her, but I recognize that would take a heck of a lot more character development on Sonic's part, so I think that if you do add to it, it'd be Sonic saying, "Hey, sorry, you're a good friend to me," and then take her up on the offer. But of course, you're probably not going to add to it, so this is just pointless babbling by me. _
Other than that, it was a good read, despite all the tears it gave me. We all need a good cry once in a while. _
And I want to add one more thing: I saw on your profile that Sonic is your favorite character and that you love every facet of his personality. Just know that I couldn't agree with you more in that respect; Sonic is my favorite as well. I just love his attitude, and yet he's so nice and kind and witty.
So thanks, and sorry for how long this is, but I really needed to get that off my chest. _
| Shadet 4-ever 3/23/10 . chapter 1
AW! That was one of the most beautiful stories I've ever read!
Keep it up!
| GlassSuicune 3/8/09 . chapter 1
Sad but well-written. The only other thing I can say is you're a good writer!
| ladyamalphia 2/8/09 . chapter 1
Hellohello :)!... I know what you're thinking, 'go away, you scum-sucking leach', but I'm here to kiss some BEHIND! ... I'm sorry. One of these days, I plan to get back to Faster than You Think ;m;. I really will!
BUTNO! I'm here to review this here piece of magnificence. Oneshots are good for me, because there's no way I can get behind :).
This was so well done all around . Good work!
I can't really think of much to point out as far as critique x), but there was something about the first bit that seemed a tiny bit off. Just how you put such nice descriptions and everything into the whole, 'he's never getting up D8' thing, but then it was like, 'oh wait, he's fine.' I mean, I understand how that was important - you definitely needed something eventful enough to make Amy particularly concerned - but I just feel like there needed to be some sort of transition between that dark, emotional 'he's dead' to 'never mind'. Y'know?
Oh, and this is just a tiny thing, but some of Amy's soul-pouring didn't feel quite right, even though it was just the words. I just can't see her saying, "reciprocate" or "pursue" or "despite" while she's bawling her eyes out.
Other than that, though, I really liked it. There were definitely a few great moments. I especially liked, 'You care about every other person in the world but me!'. The first couple words have us thinking, 'you only care about yourself', which would be a really silly thing to say to Sonic, but that last bit was suucch a nice touch C:! And the end felt a bit too abrupt, but Sonic's 'hey' was so faabbulous (:.
LOFELY WORK! Thank youu !
| JV's Jack 2/8/09 . chapter 1
i like how you wrote this without it being too contrived. It is pretty good, I like reading romance conflicts and I could almost know how Amy feels in this story. I really like it. The ending was okay, but I wish you could've ended with a little more of a kick, but it's still pretty good overall. Hope to read more from ya!
| at pie 2/5/09 . chapter 1
the only sonamy fic i've ever read that i've -truly- enjoyed.
not surprised at all that it came from you. :)