ok so thats how unicorns are made we need to make more unicorns but u hav 2 die to make them?

That. Was. Fantastic. xD

"and lolcats" totally fucking lost it right there. I was already giggling but I had to step away from the computer for a bit to regain my sanity at that point.

I thought this was serious until 'red fruit'. So I guess that's the sign of an excellent parody xD

I love you.

God, I love you. This was the most interestingly descriptive fic I've ever read. I would love to see what would happen if I used your names while I was actually having sex. I'd like to know if he would stop or just ignore what I was saying and continue.

Just marry me.

Once I stop wheezing.

LYK, OMG! This totes deserv-

Forget it. I can't do the fangirl impersonation anywhere near as well as you can. This was a downright awesome parody of all the bad lemon fics out there, and I have to say that I was in stitches from beginning to end. I cannot believe that there are people stupid enough to believe this. xDD Then again, those are probably the people dumb enough to write shit like this right? xDD

Kudos to you, really! I haven't seen a parody this good and hilarious in forever! xDD

*gasps for air* ! *breathes heavily*

I think I'm okay now...

I don't even...I don't even know what to say. I'm laughing my ass off right now; that should suffice.

I love you. You're having my babies. Or I'm having yours. Either/or.

OMG, that was so Epic. i love your sense of humor. ;)

This killed me xD

omg! i finished reading the story in laughters and proceeded to read all the reviews to see whether there're ppl stupid enough to tot this as a serious fic and turned out that - there are! that's even hillarious! some even "comforted" you for your "first lemon fic". whoa. i am dying from laughing too much. you're a god!

OH! liek, OMG! This is totally the bestest ever story I have ever read! It's so romantic and beautiful! *squees* PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE write more! I loved it when Edward stabbed Bella's love wound with his mighty sword of Eros. It was, omg, like so descriptive but totally romantic and poetic! You're an awesome writer!1!1

LAWL! I cried. This was so utterly perfect. The number of fics out there that are pretty much ... identical to this is utterly astounding. I loved your fangirly AN's and the fic itself had me howling with laughter. heehee. This right here is the perfect 'how not to write smut' example! There are many authors who could benefit from reading it!

This is beautiful. /cries a river of sparkly tears

Love pillows is such a turn off. LOL. I wonder what would happen if she yelled out, "OH, YES! TOUCH MY LOVE PILLOWS!" during sex. o-o

And wow, those euphemisms are genius. :D

"Holy wand of man juice" and "mighty sword of Eros" are my favorite.

The ending. Perfect. :D

"riding his joy pole like it is the first day at the fair"

Holy shit I almost died when I read that. My boss is looking at me funny for cracking up at my desk... This was hilarious! Loved your fangirl pisstakes at the beginning and end.