Aw, so sweet. Well, most of it. some of it I could have lived without hearing/reading/seeing...Like uh, lust, choice, and revelation. O.o but other then that, kudos to you!
You should do more 20 sentences fics. Oh, I almost forgot, here's an idea for you: what if you took that kiss from episode 12 and made it into something more, still in a library?