You've definitely nailed the Fight Club way and its characters.
And I was one of those who had their eyes squinting for slash.

It is so refreshing to see bookbased Fight Club fiction. Narrator/Tyler is totally cannon.

o luvved the ending

Your writing style is interesting. It was a little too jagged/short for me to fully enjoy, but I like the fact that you purposely confused phrases (as well as adding the indecisive, "I mean, maybe") to show the narrator's mentally unbalanced state. So this story was a mixed bag for me; not bad, but not overwhelming either.

I love how in the first paragraph you connect birth to **, thats so fight club.

Beautiful story. I could almost believe Chucky P himself wrote it. :)