You did pretty good with the story. I just want to say that you misspelled necesito, not necisito. Just advice if you're going to use Spanish in any other stories. Otherwise it's awesome.

good job elaine.
*sniff* im so proud!

*nosebleed* O/O that's... awesome...

-estan is the 'they' form of estar-the verb 'to be'.
_estar:estaoy, estas, esta, estamos, astan
-trabajo is the 'self or yo' form of trabajar-the verb 'to work'
_trabajar:trabajo, trabajas, trabaja, trabajamos, trabajan
-tambien means 'also' or 'too' so the form doesn't change
-comer is 'to eat'
_comer:como, comes, come, comemos, comen
-nececitar is 'need to do'
_nececitar:nececito, nececitas, nececita, nececitamos, nececitan
-I don't know if ver is a Spanish word. you're probably thinking of 'ir' the verb 'to go'
_ir:vo, vas, va, vamos, van
-juego-you're probably thinking of jugar 'to play'
+ Sorry. I'm taking Spanish right now, going on to Spanish 2 next year and I just couldn't but correct you. Sorry.

That was pretty good for a first lemon! I enjoyed it, keep going. :)

Gah! Sasori is teh Sex-God! LOL! I so agree with that! :D

I really enjoyed it! You're a good writer! ^/^

omg, that was ur first lemon? IT WAS GREAT! VERY WELL DONE!!

Congratulations on a well typed, easily understood story.
Deidara is amazingly attractive and you portrayed his naivety extremely well.

Not bad at all for a first lemon, keep it up. =] You're Spanish is horrible (not yelling at you lol), but that's ok/understandable hahaha. If you haven't studied it in a while forgetting a language is very easy. If you ever write a sequel to this, I'd be more than happy to help correct the Spanish XD.

Please you can't just stop at one lemon. More please.

You got the sex part down! Yay(: Good job and Oh yeah, I'm a good beta :D