good story like the direction you are taking it very refreshing looking for an update

Pretty good :D the chapter was good!

what an intriguing story; it's very well written. I agree w/ the previous reviewer that using japapese honorifics is not needed. You should also make it a Clare x Raki too. They don't go well with them just being in a sibling relationship.

Overall, it's a very good story.

This seems like an interesting story, and I for one like the direction that you are taking it.

I think however, that you need to stop using Japanese suffixes or words.

The use of Japanese in the story not only disrupts the reader's 'suspension of disbelief' but also makes absolutely no sense.

Claymore is not set in Japan, why would the characters use Japanese at all? Who used it?

While the source material uses Japanese, it is more of a consequence of the manga being made in Japan and has no bearing on Claymore-verse.

Hope this helps.

Very good. I'm eager to see this continued.

Pretty cool. The story sounds kind of epic, and it's well written too. The bit with Helen was funny as well.

Well good fic, though i don't get why Helen keeps on saying nee-san to everybody and so the pairing is Raki/Clare.

Dude, all I can say is good story. I like the post-apocalyptic theme you got going, the kinda "Everything that could go wrong, did." It's fresh, it's new, and I haven't seen anything like it in the Claymore section so far.

As for the Raki/Clare sibling, eh I think you'll do good with it. Frankly I'm more of the Raki/Clare or Raki/Harem type of guy, but that's just me. That being said I am kinda looking forward to the next chapter and finding out just what happened to the poor guy, (and girls).

Well, as disappointed as I am that Isley died and you changed the chapter to accommodate said death despite this being a fanfic, you do good work. People seemed to be in character, and it's a nice take on the usual post-apocalyptic wasteland storyline.

And nice work with Alicia's rebellion. The Organization is a graduate of the Umbrella School of Business, and, as such, always makes weapons that are 1) Unstable 2) Unreliable and 3) Likely to betray and kill them. Alicia's problem was having to keep alive a static, human target in close proximity to a warzone.

I'll consider beta-ing the story. Odds are I'll have a good amount of time on my hands when I'm between stories, so I might as well keep my writing skills honed somehow.

The story started with the narration of Raki, i assumed? The fic is off to an interesting start, nothing seem too off canon-like, all in character and the OC are not to bland either. I like it ^_^, so please do continued to update it regularly…yes?

This is pretty good! Nobody seemed out of character to me :) me likes!