In love! you have to finish it! Hopefully it will turn out bsolutly amazing!

This was an interesting piece. I'm more interested in how Ashleigh is going to deal with her grief and where her support is going to come from. The pace of these first two chapters was good but I would recommend these being made into one chapter - they are short enough to be combined, and can be considered too brief to be split into two. I enjoyed the element of surprise that Ash didn't win the Derby outright - I was expecting her too! However, the clever twist of the filly who does win obviously makes Ash and Pride win by default. Is winning by default going to be an ongoing theme here? It could be an interesting structure if you use it.

On a different note, your dialogue is good - the conversation between Ash and James is particularly good and flows well so well done. Not always easy!

please update this-its awesome!

i think the stroy was great

Sort of fast-paced, but it's stiil great:)

please please please write more

PLease update...please please please...please! :)

This story has potential! please continue writing...

I really like your story. please update soon!

Great start, I can't wait to read more. Would I be right in assuming that Brad is the saviour? Anyways, more please :D