Aww I absolutely adored it! You turned lemon into a sweet and poetic moment between two lovers, which is combined for a beautiful and unexpected contrast. I'm no english teacher, but that my friend was really REALLY good. You are on my favorites

You know, I never realized how potentially sexual your poem was until I read it here, with all those volcanoes and iron giants and chalices being filled with myrrh.

Still, I liked the passion between De Nam and Anais Nin. It was very clear that there was a great amount of love between them. I liked that your scene came across as more sensual than sexual. I think it fit better for them.

Nice job on your (first?) Mount Kilanda story.