I couldn't get through the first chapter of story...

It is really, REALLY pathetic...

Please stop writing and spare us...

good job on your stories

Ok now I'm going to try and put this as politly as possible; this story is rubbish.

I'm sorry to put it so bluntly but it's the truth, and I mean come on the way you wrote Bella's mum's reaction was shite. 'Bella you were raped. go live with your dad.' SERIOUSLY? And then Edwards reaction to seeing Bella again 'Oh look theres the girl I raped and took her V-card.' are you f-ing kidding me? Sorry if I seemed mean it's just I don't like to waste my time on fics that are totaly unrealsitic, poorly written and no consideration to those people who do have to endure stuff like rape and abuse.

Ok now I'm going to try and put this as politly as possible; this story is rubbish.

I'm sorry to put it so bluntly but it's the truth, and I mean come on the way you wrote Bella's mum's reaction was shite. 'Bella you were raped. go live with your dad.' SERIOUSLY? And then Edwards reaction to seeing Bella again 'Oh look theres the girl I raped and took her V-card.' are you f-ing kidding me? Sorry if I seemed mean it's just I don't like to waste my time on fics that are totaly unrealsitic, poorly written and no consideration to those people who do have to endure stuff like rape and abuse.

this was the most stupid story ever! I hate it, it sucked.

VERY POORLY WRITTEN.

COMPLEAT WESTE OF TIME

Um... Did you think this story through? It's like you made it up on the spot. I'm actually disappointed in this story. I skipped around a bit in every chapter, and honestly...

You didn't do so hot. Are you sure you're 18? You write too unrealistically and cliched for one. Hopefully you'll do better as you get older.

P.s. If you wanna get a hold of me my username is AshKake. I was too lazy to log in.

Okay, there is something seriously wrong with your story. Your premise is just plain creepy and not in a good way...

First of all, couldn't Renee make herself a cup of coffee in her own house, it ain't that difficult. And I think that no matter how selfish a mother, no mother would send her kid at midnight for a cup of coffee.

Second, using an iPod during the night on the streets? Way to be street smart Bella. You would figure that her being someone who has actually lived in a city would know that's a big no-no. Then again, she cut through a dark alleyway... I'm pretty sure this is how slasher and porn films begin... Tragically stupid.

Third, you beta isn't doing you any favors, the spelling and grammar in this thing is atrocious, I can see it and English is my second language.

Fourth, I've never been raped, but I'm pretty sure that I wouldn't eventually fall in love with the person who caused me so much mental anguish. This is just wrong and pretty ignorant of you. You should try researching before unleashing your writing into the poor populace, it isnt so difficult now a days... I'm pretty sure you can type rape on Google and you would get accounts of rape victims (let's say it all together: VICTIMS, I wasn't sure you got that) and tons of support sites where you could be a responsible and GOOD writer and research the subject you are writing about.

Fifth, parental compassion much? I'm pretty sure something like that could've sent Bella into a panic attack just by telling her her mother is getting rid of her, instead she just nods. Real realistic of you, mate, you really hit the nail with that one gritty and hard reaction...

Sixth, there's no way I can nicely put this, and believe me, I tried. I even was good enough to put a list of reasons why you suck, but the cold, hard truth is that you suck. You are supposed to be eighteen but by the quality of the writing (and I'm not talking technicality-wise) I would've pegged you for twelve or thirteen. I mean you wrote this crap a couple of years ago, but aren't you embarassed to be linked to this sad piece of writing? I know I would be...

Lastly, this one is not for you, but for the rest of ignorant losers that actually thought this was a good idea... You guys make me loose my faith in humanity, good job!

OMG U MADE BELLA PREGNANT DIDNT U!LOVE THE STORY!

Omg that story was amazing haha it made me laugh and cry...so great job with it. It was probably the best story I've read in such a long time

..I'm not logged in but I'm vampiressuckandwerewolvesbite. It both mine and my friends take a look at our story...although its not twilight unfortunately my friend isn't a fan

Omg that story was amazing haha it made me laugh and cry...so great job with it. It was probably the best story I've read in such a long time

..I'm not logged in but I'm vampiressuckandwerewolvesbite. It both mine and my friends take a look at our story...although its not twilight unfortunately my friend isn't a fan

Ok i love the baby boy he is so funny but i would love to hear what happen to them when they get older it was a very funny and amazing story i loved it lol keep up the great work

Marisela stokely

love it

amazing

love it

amazing