|Reviews for If Love Could Light a Candle|
| Capricorn75 4/27/09 . chapter 1
Pastiche! I've been waiting and wishing and hoping and praying you would start something new with Edward. I love this first chapter, it's amazing how much history and emotion you've covered already. I can't wait to read more of this!
| Via 4/27/09 . chapter 1
The beginning of this is promising! I've always though Edward should be a psychologist. It just makes sense. lol D Please update soon I want to see what happens next!
| Unintended-u 4/27/09 . chapter 1
M..i'm already hooked up. (: Can't wait for her first appointment too!
Thanks for writing this.
| Jenn With 2 Ns 4/27/09 . chapter 1
Gorgeous. Thorough. Intriguing. Evocative. Vivid. Yum!
| AvaAnne 4/27/09 . chapter 1
I like your story so far. Are you going to have flashbacks of Edward's life before Bella throughout your story or is it just set up to get the gist of Edward thus far?
| Felacia Cullen 4/26/09 . chapter 1
oh very good! i'm liking this one already! looking forward to more
| michswan 4/26/09 . chapter 1
Intriguing new story PP. I'm anxiously awaiting more... :)
| Lyssie Len 4/26/09 . chapter 1
I loved this Edward. He's just the right mixture of darkness, good intentions gone wrong, a bit uptight, 'caught' between seventeen and a century...I live for good Edward characterization. This one goes on the favs.
I loved the imagery throughout the chapter. This line was one of my favorites: "Edward’s throat burned, and his eyes flicked uncontrollably from red to black, black to red every time a human passed by."
The past murder was very well done. Enough details to be dark and a bit creepy, so we understand how horrible the man is, and how Edward, whatever his intentions, is no innocent either, but it never goes over-the-top into melodrama or squick...it was done tastefully.
Your Carlisle was adorable. His excitement over Edward being a psychologist was nicely done, and his brief curiosity over 'doctor fantasies' made me giggle.
Edward the mindreader as a psychologist is an interesting premise, and I look forward to seeing more of his dealings with those whose minds he can read.
You have a unique take on Jasper, and it's interesting to see his accent still in place. I'm not American, so I can't comment on how accurate it is, but it never threw me out of the story, which some people's attempts at writing dialects have done in the past. His interaction with Edward was really good. Telepathy and empathy are sort of different sides of the same coin, so I always thought they'd talk a bit about that, and you never really see them interact a lot in AU, non-human fics. And the music battle at the end of that section was adorable.
Edward's annoyance at Alice's 'I've seen it in my visions!' is palpable, Alice really does come across as annoyingly confident in her own abilities, and they do seem like siblings in that bit.
Shrink reconaissance missions are the best thing ever. I giggled. Edward goes about it so seriously. I wonder if he has a little log book where he writes down the results of his stalking. Is the parallel to his Twilight stalking behavior intentional?
"On Wednesday, Edward took a mental break." - I lol'd. Poor Edward must get headaches at the thoughts of so many messed up individuals. Despite the mindreading, Edward doesn't really relate well to humanity. He likes humans more in theory than in person.
Imagining Edward showing up at that lady's house, saying hello and leaving again cracked me up.
I liked that Edward had Jasper and Emmett to try and prepare himself for facing Bella. Usually it's the 'Bella walks in and her scent suddenly hits him and Edward must resist the urge to snack' deal, and it's nice to see a unique twist on it.
Loved the brotherly teasing when they realize that Edward is a bit jealous over their appreciation of Bella.
I'm looking forward to the next part.
| 10thandrose 4/26/09 . chapter 1
Can I just say that the way Jasper's speakin is EXACTLY how my Texan friends speak (and I used to before I moved to Chicago). LOL. When he said sangers, I just about fell out of my chair. Now just add a 'git,' 'fir,' 'goin ta,' and 'howdy,' and he IS my friend Mike. :)
| blahblahblah246 4/26/09 . chapter 1
This is going to be a long review, but this chapter (and I feel the whole story) will require this length.
The fast being as long as it was, Edward’s throat burned, and his eyes flicked uncontrollably from red to black, black to red every time a human passed by.
-This line really pulled me into the world you're writing here. I was already intrigued, but this line hooked me.
The worming feeling had been growing in the man’s chest for some hours, pain coming from one new corner after the next—from depths in his body that the bum’d never felt before.
-Very raw, immediate. The way you write this. It's nearly painful to read.
Taking away his pain would be stealing a sliver of his humanity, and no matter how flimsy the sliver may be, Edward would not despoil a drop of his mortal blood.
-Aww, very conflicted the emotions you are trying to get across here. Edward's being noble while also being kind of horrible. He wishes to not steal the life from this person, yet, I'm sure the bum might appreciate death reaching him more quickly. It's...conflicted. Yet, very Edward. And you have me quite conflicted thinking about it. Like, why couldn't he show this man some mercy and kill him? But, then is that mercy? What is mercy? Brings up questions of when it is right to take a life as well. I'm sure you're not meaning to touch on these issues, but that's the way my mind works.
As undead killing machines, vampires derided human religion. “Christ dead and resurrected in three days—me, too!” was the usual joke. Edward hated that joke—but that wasn’t why he ill-favored churches. He avoided churches because of the intensity of emotion there: love, self-righteousness, blind joy, fear, and loss concentrated in the vaulted chambers. Humanity at its best and worst.
-I love the way Edward sees things. He's so objective about many things (or tries to be) but then his opinions leak into everything... but in a way that is funny and "I hate to agree with you" sort of way. And you continue, to really paint the picture of Vampward here. The thoughts at the beginning of this chapter started it, but then the description of the onslaught of thoughts he receives at the church cements it.
...he spoke with certainty, his words cutting like daggers and punctuating like stabs.
-Like I said before, painful and so vivid.
Edward swore out a string of oaths. He wanted to slap the imbecilic sap for his incompetence.
-Sigh. Yes. Sad that incompetency existed then and continues today. And, I say this as a Catholic. Hopefully you or anyone else isn't offended by this review. (Okay, maybe not as sorry as I should be)
Edward punched him in the kneecap. He heard the crackling bits of bone and cartilage.
-Guh. Very raw. And I'm kind of excited to read Edward's chosen killees every chapter. Kind of sick that I am, but true.
He drank, pulling in the bittersweet stream, sweet like blood always was, but bitter from the adrenaline—a reason to kill quickly, even if Edward’s mission demanded that he punish.
-Really enjoyed this detail. Once again, because it is something that is passed over in canon (not that there was a place it could have fit) or in very many fan fictions. The way he kills. The physiological processes are very interesting, and more so because it's not like reading a science textbook.
Edward didn’t think Jasper had focused on the other feeling—the sense of comfort in the second vision.
-For Edward to sense the comfort of the vision is a pretty powerful second-hand experience. Or was it that he felt comforted seeing that vision or like I said before, that he felt himself as feeling comfort *in* that vision? Does that make sense? I ask because Alice's visions are a hot topic button in AU world, but for me, I always find it interesting how exactly Edward *experiences* those visions. I know that Alice can feel the force of a vision, if it comes quickly and has to do with death/despair, but does she actually feel the emotions of the scene and by his ability does Edward? Sorry. I'm rambling again.
The Pixies held a special place in the fuck-you corner of Edward’s psyche.
-Ha! Nothing else to add.
He played “Yankee Doodle” with atypical gusto.
-The dynamics you have between Jasper and Edward made me laugh. I find it refreshing to read a Jasper that feels...accurate. That is a weird thing to say. But, I feel like Jaspers have gotten a wee bit caricatured as of late and yours feels...correct in accordance with his background. To be honest though, at the same time, I do find it kind of off-putting. Jars me out of the reading. But, I think that might be my own fault. It might be because it feels new to me, and so I'm not used to it. And, it'll probably be something I'll grow accustomed too.
“Did you set it to radians?”
“That would be the problem.”
-That gave me a lot of flashbacks. Me and my graphing calculator. Good ol' Texas Instruments.
Edward would take the breath, then gasp, growl, and start to lunge.
-I see, once again, why you called this the story where "Edward is a vampire"
Edward rolled his eyes. “I hit you because YOU,” he pointed at Emmett, “were ogling her ass, and because YOU,” he pointed at Jasper, “wanted to eat her, too.”
-Too funny, but funnier that Emmett and Jasper called him on it.
He was anxious for her first appointment.
I really liked the bit about the candles. It's true that most churches have them, and then many of them require you to give a donation before you can light one. Cause you can totally pray on your own, but a lit candle will cost you a buck. Once again, not being offensive. Sigh. I just make fun of my religion a lot. I suppose.
In conclusion. First, yeah this was long and hopefully I didn't bore you. But, I really, really enjoyed this. It's refreshing. It's intriguing. But, it doesn't feel like it's trying to be that way. Does that make sense? It feels good to read. Like I'm not wasting my time (like I do with countless other fics I have alerted). I feel like I'm gaining something more here, about Edward as both vampire and now that Bella is getting thrown into the mix, perhaps man as well.
Thank you for writing, what seems to be turning into, a brilliant story.
| americnxidiot 4/26/09 . chapter 1
You *know* I'm excited about this one.
Really can't wait to see where you take this :)
| aschim 4/26/09 . chapter 1
I am totally into this story, and the level of writing that you have chosen!
I think Jasper's accent is funny, which is nice, since Emmet is usually the funny one solo.
love it, keep it up.
Oh, and I especially appreciated the realistic eavesdropping that Edward does; it seemed so much more real. Humans can be so foul, and so great. it was awesome!
| JulieToo 4/26/09 . chapter 1
Oh! I really really enjoyed The Nymph and the Waterfall. Can't wait for more chapters. But take your time; good prose isn't the same as immediate gratification.
| Decoherence 4/26/09 . chapter 1
Wailing—squealing, like the unearthly sound of a deer being ripped alive in the jaws of a lion—screeching like a rabbit in the talons of a hawk—making noise like an animal makes noise when it accepts that silence will no longer hide it from pain or death.
I really loved this line.
This chap was filled with noir but also very funny. Jasper's speech in ILCLaC totaly reminds me of the way my Mom speaks!
Uh...I was wondering if in the 3rd scene if the timeline was actually supposed to be Jan 2005 instead of 2004 seeing as how the previous scene was Dec 2004?
| AngstGoddess003 4/26/09 . chapter 1
WANTS TO BE THE FIRST TO REVIEW! YAY FOR FINALLY POSTING!