That's a definite win. You portrayed Vegeta's character accurately, focusing on the internal changes he has gone through the years, after the destruction of his planet, his habitation in Earth, his death and sacrifice etc. Goku's quote about the new race they created fitted in rather nicely and I'm glad that you used it. It seemed to me that the during the entire story, Vegeta came to an understanding; that at some point in our lives, no matter how important (or not) we are in this world, we have to step back and let the next generation take over the reins of the world, because the future is waiting for them to claim it.

I cherished the entire story, and mostly the moral behind it (though you may never even intended for it to have a moral to give, but that's the magic of literature and art in general; anyone can interpret things in a completely different way). You writing style is very unique and the words you used were

loved it! it was incredibly well thought out and coherent while being so completely out there (in a good way of course!)

This was amazing. I enjoyed reading every single word of it, and getting this glimpse into Vegeta's mind through your eyes. The lyrical aspect of it was so lovely- you have a way with words that is spectacular. Kudos!

Wonderful. I could just imagine Vegeta sitting there and watching children be children. Enjoying it, realizing how neccessary it is, and then in terms of Goku. Everything about the writing and the image we're given was beautiful.

An excellent fic.

absolutely beautiful

beautiful so in character many fails to understand the change in vegeta post buu...keep writing nothing bad except 'twilit' is spelled 'twilight' but im sure you already know with the vampire sensation infecting us...lol

This was an amazing story, absolutely amazing! I loved it. Wow, shabam, ka-ka-powie!

I think this is your best DBZ Fic by far.

Fantastic story! A great read. Thanks!)

Wow.

I just found this story, and boy am I glad I did. This simply one of the best pieces of DBZ fanfiction I've read, period. The characters are dead-on, the writing is impeccable, the detail is wonderful, and the introspection comes across as completely natural. Nothing seems forced.

I particularly enjoyed how disjointed Vegeta's thoughts seemed at times. It had an almost stream-of-consciousness quality to it, but was still remarkably easy to follow. Again, it came across as completely natural, rather than contrived or artificial. Perhaps most impressive, though, is how you portray the relationships between the various characters. You switch from one set of interactions to another absolutely seamlessly. I've always found Goku especially difficult to write, but you've captured his character to a T. The fact that you do so through Vegeta's eyes makes it all the more remarkable.
It's obvious how much time and effort went into this piece. This is truly excellent work. Well done.

Oh wow. That was excellent. And THAT is how the entire Dragonball Z series should have ended. No GT. Just this. Amazing. Simply amazing.

this story feels a lot like a collection of wishy washy mumbo jumbo

i love it to bits for that!

seriously though the way you've constructed the one shot is very much like looking into the abstractness of thought- an even more complicated, the thoughts of someone such as Vegeta. very enjoyable, beautifully written and deeply appealing. Reminds me of fifth business for some reason, but without the tinge of overbearing arrogance, just pure speculative thoughts and some conclusions made without being too obvious about it.

How in the world can you think that it fails! It's amazing! Everything falls within what one would expect Vegeta to think... or at least it's presented in a way that allows you to think that.

Not only that, it's constructed so well and your style of writing is practically flawless!

I nothing left to say other than Bravo!

(favorites this story too as he nods in approval) Boy, Vegeta is one Hell of a complicated character, yet you write him like an expert and you've only recently become a true fan of Dragonball Z. I have so gotta start watching the DBZ episodes on the Internet sometimes. I need to expand my list of interests.

Yet another comparison to make Vegeta and Goku's rivalry seems awfully similar to that of Yugi and Kaiba's. Amazing how the characters from both Yu-Gi-Oh and Dragonball Z can seem so similar when you stop to think about it, don't you think?

Once again, outstanding work on getting inside Vegeta's mind. It is somewhat confusing how someone who was once an enemy can become an ally and still be almost exactly the same way he was while being influenced by evil. Psychology of the human mind can be a very mysterious topic, huh?

I hope you write more of these soon; they're so fascinating! Keep up the good work with your writing!

huh, this is pretty neat. I didn't hurt my head this time though! XD I really have no clue about this fandom, but, from what I've read from this, Vegeta is like Dragonball Z's version of Bakura and Goku is kinda like Joey... I think... *frowns* okay, now I hurt my head. DX Awesome job with this, these DEEP things of yours are really neat. It's odd how we both churned out the same kind of style at the same time my creepy "I should be Pharaoh" was started a few weeks before I went to Toronto and was completed on the trip back. I guess great minds do think alike... but I wouldn't have the strength to pump them out like you do. keep it up and talk to you soon!