|Reviews for The Lay of a Broken Winged Sparrow|
| Karano 4/16/13 . chapter 24
I think I've read this twice already. What do you want more? From your writing style, I can see you're a good writter, so you already know how nice this whole story sounds. But, PLEASE, in the name of Aion and Lady Ariel, please, I beg you, update already! It's not like we can read another Aion story while we wait for the next update, because your story is the longest and the only story that I can read with actual joy, not by stressing my mind about "what this word/sentence/ part/etc means". So please, in the name of Fregion, Maslametida, Tiamat, and for the love of both the Elyos and the Asmodians, PLEASE UPDATE.
| Wolf-Pup31 3/29/13 . chapter 24
This is really good, please update soon, i comand it of you! ;3
| Quna 3/15/13 . chapter 24
Argh, I tried to be patient, but I really miss reading this. I know you're busy, but just so you know, I'm still waiting holding my breath (yeah, despite all the criticism I unleashed the last time I poster a review). I hope you post a new chapter soon. QQ
| Hunny 3/14/13 . chapter 24
Holy god, people, start reviewing! How do u think she'll post another chapter if you don't review? Anyway. Sorry for reviewing only the 2nd time I read this. I observed that you don't have mistakes (there are a few spelling mistakes, but I barely noticed them). And, well, what am I supposed to say? The cliffhangers are nice, and the plot is solid, so yeah, nothing to complain here. Well done, and I wanna read more :D
| Karano 2/26/13 . chapter 18
Look, I don't wanna be mean or something, but I didn't get it. Trist and Kiert are gay? No offence intended, I'm just confused.
| Nessya 1/23/13 . chapter 24
Damn, I just finished reading all chapter in a row and now I've come to the end. You have to continue the story!
| Eleneri 12/17/12 . chapter 24
There exist, in the world of fanfiction, a scant handful of stories which are flawless, glorious creations. This is one of them. Thank you for sharing your art, because that is what this is. Literary brushstrokes in a master craftsman's hand. I've never played Aion, and now I don't want to, simply because the world in the game could never compare to the eloquent, breathing richness you've put on the page. Bravo.
| Quna 12/12/12 . chapter 4
You've done a grave mistake. You haven't updated for so long, I had time to come up with more critique, so here it goes:
1. Jaya keeps repeating herself a lot when she's talking about eyes. "his black eyes to my silver ones" or "his golden eyes to my silver ones". Okay, we got it, we know you have silver eyes, Taion has golden and Oros has black eyes, no need to remind us in every chapter.
2. Another thing being repeated over and over again: "clever fingers" - I don't remember it being mentioned in later chapters, but boy she kept saying it, and I couldn't help but start thinking about all kinds of ways how his fingers could leave that impression besides playing with weapons... ehem (unless I'm not far off the mark and that was a hint xD) :insertandextremelyinnocentsm ileyfacehere:
3. And I've already written about the last chapter, but let me come up with something more detailed: Jaya didn't ask, and Jareth didn't find any need to explain why Raum had needed to fake his own death, or the fate of Avarran Carcaron. Jareth didn't inquire anything of Jaya's position and life in Elysea, or who the Furiae were, when she mentioned them, or how come she looked like an Elyos, her ASCENSION? How could he not have nticed that, he figured out the powers of The Last Word without so much as a hint, not to mention, Jaya was able to tell that he had ascended, and Jareth is a powerful sorcerer now, so he should've had even more ability to see, yet there's no mention of it. Also, the fact that in spite of seeing her being accompanied by an Elyos, he still thinks she was sent by Raum throws me off.
4. The last but not the least, Oros looks just like his father, but he has his mother's eyes... You know what I'm getting at ;)
That's all for now, update soon or I'll find more things to complain about XD
| Wait 12/6/12 . chapter 1
oh please write another one! i have been waiting for far too long :/
| Quna 12/4/12 . chapter 24
I guess I'm cursed, or bring bad luck to the stories I love. Will this stay unfinished forever? :(
| The Stolen Deity 10/25/12 . chapter 24
I'd stopped reading this fic a while back and when I came back to it I saw that it's already up to chap 24! Wow this fic has come a long way and I am amazed at the progression of the story and it'sit's character development. So much has happened since where left off that I'm still trying to take it all in! All I can say though is you are a wonderful writer and I cannot wait for the next installment!
| Cas 10/4/12 . chapter 24
Hey, I just read this,
And this is crazy,
But here's a review,
So update, maybe?
Oh yes. I went there. I REGRET NOTHING.
In all seriousness, this was a fantastic read (your writing style! your imagery! your characterization! LOVE!) and I had a moment of panic when there was no next button. It jolted me out of Atreia and back into cold, harsh reality. (Though honestly, reality is much warmer than Asmodae.)
So here I sit with a fanfiction hangover, unable to move on, thinking, "I can be patient. This doesn't faze me. I can be a rational being. I'm sure the author will update soo-WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT'S BEEN FOUR MONTHS?!"
But I can do it. I can sit here and cheer on your writing from the sidelines. Patiently.
Thank you SO MUCH for writing this!
| Guest 10/3/12 . chapter 24
As usual you did a wonderfull job! I come every day, looking for a new chapter. It is great fun to read your story and see how the characters and their relationships slowly change. How many days does it take you to write a chap like this? Or do you just get insane inspirations and do it at one go? (in which case that would make you a genius, nothing less)?
| MinniMuffin 9/13/12 . chapter 24
This is definitely the best written fanfiction I have ever read! Your writing is amazing, the plot is great and every single character is interesting. It's been a while since I read a something with a strong female protagonist. I couldn't stop reading during the last few chapters (though I have to get up in about half an hour...) The flow of "The Lay" is perfect. I'm looking forward to the next chapter :)
| blackroseaerith 9/12/12 . chapter 22
With all the hints so far i kind of expected him being a half. It seems like Aeril isn't very liked, haha but on the other side i can understand her actions. She wants to protect all of her people, even if some of them have to suffer for it. Another great chapter!