aahaha yea she deserved it for badmouthin him XD team outcast how did shino and lee find out bout kyuu? o.O

yay more garbage. why is it that all the anko fics no matter what the story are junk except like 2?

Issues

1) learn to spell

2) go back to school and learn about proper grammar

:D

no really thats all thats really wrong with the fic, its a very interesting idea and plot, ive never written an outright flame (to nice to do it) so i wanted to give it a shot. how'd i do?

theres a few spelling errors and grammar mistakes i.e. punctuation run on sentences etc. but those tend to happen in writing. other than that its a good read so far.

(First signed review appeared unsigned due to auto-logout. Feel free to delete.)

Where to begin?

I was slightly intrigued by the idea of Naruto losing to Kiba and becoming a 'renaissance-nin'. I had thoughts of him gaining some humility from his defeat and learning a large swath of skills and abilities from the 'Gallant Jiriaya'.

There is no excuse for what this fic truly is.

I understand, as I am also a Pennsylvanian, that it is an utter MIRACLE for a Philadelphian to be literate... much less able to write their own name. Therefore, I was willing to cut you a slight bit of slack with the occasional typo. You went far beyond the typographical, however, and then past misspelling deep into the realm of 'this is so stupid I cannot even begin to decipher it'. I thought at one point in this chapter Naruto threw three kunai and somehow hit Ebisu in the back with a pet shop. I actually had a laugh at the utter absurdity before realizing this was NOT a parody fic... and that you were indeed serious.

Let us leave your buffoonery with basic English at that and go on to other matters. Storytelling is an art which is sometimes subtle and others tumultuous. A good writer knows to set a scene, their audience must have their attention grasped completely and have all sense of self absorbed by the tale you weave around them. This connection between writer and audience is a fragile thing, and it is the writer's job to make sure their audience's level of immersion is always at its peak. Therefore, directly addressing them out of narrative 'voice' is a universally BAD IDEA. (AN: There is no excuse for author's notes cluttering up the body of your work. Especially when it provides us nothing useful!)

Characters... another cornerstone of writing. Development is a huge part of the character because the reader needs to be able to identify with them. The character also needs to struggle and grow in order for the story to be interesting in even the vaguest sense. Emotion may be even more important than development because without emotion there can BE no development. Human beings are ruled by their desires, and the two chief desires are to avoid pain and gain pleasure, in that order. A skilled writer will use a delicate balance of emotion to nudge a character into making choices that fuel their development into what that author wishes them to become. It is a slow process, with drama, angst, love et al threaded delicately throughout the narrative. Where a skilled writer is an artist... you would be more likened to a house painter with a dirty brush and watered down paint in a building condemned for unfit living conditions. This, I think, is an analogy any Philadelphian could understand. There was neither development nor genuine emotion in this fic, and thus I did not feel the least connected to your characters save for being likewise stricken by your terrible writing.

In conclusion, "Renaissance Nin" is utterly loathsome. To improve, I recommend you bolster whatever little you have gleaned from your perfunctory socialized schooling with something - ANYTHING written by a skilled hand and creative mind. Filled to bursting with unforgivable ignorance and the hubris to actually think the world would give a damn to hear it... how sad it must be to be you.

Where to begin?

I was slightly intrigued by the idea of Naruto losing to Kiba and becoming a 'renaissance-nin'. I had thoughts of him gaining some humility from his defeat and learning a large swath of skills and abilities from the 'Gallant Jiriaya'.

There is no excuse for what this fic truly is.

I understand, as I am also a Pennsylvanian, that it is an utter MIRACLE for a Philadelphian to be literate... much less able to write their own name. Therefore, I was willing to cut you a slight bit of slack with the occasional typo. You went far beyond the typographical, however, and then past misspelling deep into the realm of 'this is so stupid I cannot even begin to decipher it'. I thought at one point in this chapter Naruto threw three kunai and somehow hit Ebisu in the back with a pet shop. I actually had a laugh at the utter absurdity before realizing this was NOT a parody fic... and that you were indeed serious.

Let us leave your buffoonery with basic English at that and go on to other matters. Storytelling is an art which is sometimes subtle and others tumultuous. A good writer knows to set a scene, their audience must have their attention grasped completely and have all sense of self absorbed by the tale you weave around them. This connection between writer and audience is a fragile thing, and it is the writer's job to make sure their audience's level of immersion is always at its peak. Therefore, directly addressing them out of narrative 'voice' is a universally BAD IDEA. (AN: There is no excuse for author's notes cluttering up the body of your work. Especially when it provides us nothing useful!)

Characters... another cornerstone of writing. Development is a huge part of the character because the reader needs to be able to identify with them. The character also needs to struggle and grow in order for the story to be interesting in even the vaguest sense. Emotion may be even more important than development because without emotion there can BE no development. Human beings are ruled by their desires, and the two chief desires are to avoid pain and gain pleasure, in that order. A skilled writer will use a delicate balance of emotion to nudge a character into making choices that fuel their development into what that author wishes them to become. It is a slow process, with drama, angst, love et al threaded delicately throughout the narrative. Where a skilled writer is an artist... you would be more likened to a house painter with a dirty brush and watered down paint in a building condemned for unfit living conditions. This, I think, is an analogy any Philadelphian could understand. There was neither development nor genuine emotion in this fic, and thus I did not feel the least connected to your characters save for being likewise stricken by your terrible writing.

In conclusion, "Renaissance Nin" is utterly loathsome. To improve, I recommend you bolster whatever little you have gleaned from your perfunctory socialized schooling with something - ANYTHING written by a skilled hand and creative mind. Filled to bursting with unforgivable ignorance and the hubris to actually think the world would give a damn to hear it... how sad it must be to be you.

I was actually liking the story, too.. But you had Naruto become a little bitch around Anko, when she totally did deserve what he said. Especially after how she acted when he asked for training.

It was a good start, but Naruto torturing Ebisu in front of the masses sort of blew it for me. Not Ninja-like at all. More like a kid who thinks he has enough power to make people who hated him sorry for their actions. Just a kid. And the "Anko-hime" and "Naruto-kun" development was out of the blue. Just sympathy for what the other has gone through isn't enough for Anko to call Naruto "Naruto-kun". And Anko's rejection doesn't exactly foster feelings of affection. I would have thought that Naruto would lump her with the rest of the Kyuubi-brat-haters.

it was a good idea...but sadly you've lost me with this chap.

In the same way his plan was a EPIC FAIL, you can also count this story as another EPIC FAIL. Good lord this suck so much is not even funny. One chapter you show Anko as a bitch the next she is calling him Naruto-kun and he Anko-hime, he is little friends with Kyuubi, I'll stop here becasue I dont want to start in a real flame. A little advice, delete this shit, think better of what you want to write, eliminate the overly cliche of fox mask, flames in coat and shitty writing or just everything, look for a beta and ask him for help to estructurate this shit

Great

Excellent story so far.

good story

very good chapter much better than the original. I wonder why sarutobi did not even try to comfort Naruto.

Awesome you did a great job on this and that flashback was freakin heartrenching I cant wait to read more especially if saskura is going to get it also I hope the Kurenia redemption is going to come up soon

Kurenai bashing thats a new one, i kinda like narutoxkurenai fics but i also like nartutoxanko fics so i can get over the kurenai bashing, with that said i kinda wanna see where you are gonna go with this fic it's been intresting so far.

Keep up the good work

SHIT, this is utter fucking SHIT. People breaking the law of Sandaime in his face , even daring to attack the Hokage, Naruto I-am-so-fucking-good-that-I-can-fly is shit. This is like reading one of those retarded five years old kid fanfics. Delete this shit and start again with proper character development (no angst that sucks). I very much doubt that someone would accept Anko so easily after what she told Naruto at the dango pub. Find yourself a beta, originality and a proper FIC. Because this honestly fails

Wow. The reborn ninja. Hm. That's awesome. I will totally be adding the to favorites and waiting for updates! Thanks for the great read.

good chapter

interesting chapter. i liked it. narutos gonna kick ass and take names woop woop