So very sweet! I love seeing my favorite couple so in love like this! :D

This was a really cute relationship story for Chie and Yousuke. I would like to see you write more for them, because I feel like they don't get much love from other writers. (We are part of a very small writing fraternity, I think.)

Lots of great brief moments of description throughout all of these vignettes that will stick with me for a while.

Writing teenagers in love can be angsty, but I like that you leave them as fun-loving and lively young people who are finding themselves and each other in their own romance.

I'll add this one to my favorites!

Some very sweet memories for the two of them here. I like the fulfillment that Chie offers to Yousuke, and vice versa. It's a nice marriage of conflicting personalities and values for them.

And envisioning Chie on her first date with him is adorable! :D

I'm curious why they're fighting Shadows here, after endgame and Souji's departure. Maybe you could expand on that...? It would also be interesting to know how Yousuke could (or maybe could not) face a Shadow that takes his form and spouts fearful or angry words about Chie.

Critique:
"The mingled smell of sweat and perfume engulfed his [senses]."
It's a great line, though - I really like it - just fix the last word.

Nice job!

A quite sweet moment between these two.

The last line is great - that image will keep coming back to me.

Well done!

More adorable-ness from my favorite P4 couple! (I know that I am reading and reviewing these all at a clip, but I just found this story, and it's short enough that I can just zip through it all...plus, HanaChie does not get enough love around here! We supporters have to stick together!)

I really like where Chie hugs him from behind - that's a very nice little heartwarming moment. Dreamy, too, in the setting of the rain letting up.

Critique:
"The umbrella slipped back to reveal a lightening sky with rays of [sunshine] breaking through. Bright yellow light [was] filtered through raindrops."
You could also just say:
"Bright yellow light filtered through raindrops."
That's a slightly less prosaic way of saying it, in keeping with the dreaminess of the moment.

Nice!

Hmm, I thought that they kissed in the first chapter. I suppose the real point here is that SHE makes the move to kiss HIM first, a nice first step for them.

It's kind of jerky of Yousuke to point out how much he had to spend on her, but I suppose that that's part of that Hanamura awkwardness shining through. And it is their first Christmas together as a couple, so I'm sure Chie forgives him.

One writing critique:
The possessive of "it" is "its" - when you write "it's" that means "it is". Just one of those pesky English grammar rules.

Again, very cute!

I take it that this takes place during their last (third) year at Yasogami.

I like the mention of Souji - and his departure - being the impetus for Yousuke to ask out Chie, at last. The phrase "triggered Yousuke's courage into high gear" is an especially good one - evokes just the right amount of tension and nervousness.

Good!

Very sweet - but (again) it would be great to get more than just a little glimpse into the thought processes going on here.

These seem to be primarily from Yousuke's point of view, which is a nice switch for me. (I write from Chie's.) I like the way that he's really sweet but kind of clueless. Cute!

Ha ha! Of course Yousuke would react that way to Chie eating a banana! :D (I did something of the same thing in my HanaChie story, too, except it involved a topsicle.) Quite cute, but I would like to see a little bit more than just a vignette here.

This is a cute start - Chie and Yousuke are my favorite (OTP) couple, as well! I like that things don't move smoothly for them at first - sounds like a problem that they would have.

I'll read the rest!

aw that was cute...

aw that was sweet...*sighs*

hahahha lol that was unexpected...pikachu...hahah they were totally in character i was wondering when the pointless arguments would start lol

Aww that was a cute thing for Yousuke to say and especially for Chie!

lol aww poor yousuke i bet he thought it was for something else hahaha i love this pairing! thanks a lot!