wo! omgomgomg lol. good chappie, fight scene!

That was so refreshing to read. Its different in a good way. I'll be waiting eagerly to read more. (: Jeffery Gaines Dark Love Song.

It's been a while since I last saw something new posted here. I'm glad to see someone's still alive.

Spelling and grammar are good. Which is a nice change.

Do you know your beta, personally? Because it's a good idea to get betareaders whom you DON'T already know. They're less biased.

Good luck with your writing.

Well done on posting another chapter. :) It's great you put a lot of time into revising it for yourself.

omg! nearly 3mths new chapter! id stoped hoping for more! good chappie, good cliffy in the end. please write feaster! k

A chapter! Ahaha, that was cute :) Cant Wait for the next to come out! :)

I'm glad you finished another chapter! As I said, it's nice to see the plot moving along with the introduction of the CGIs. :)

Hhehe... This is my 3rd time reading, yet I forgot to review! This was definitely entertaining. :) I'm stund.

Hey there nice fic! I like fics that redo the canon in some way.

yay update! u rock! i am so thriled they made it to connestoga, going to da carnival. i like the brother n sisters relatinship. i wonder what adventeres will raven have now?? best chapter so far, i want MORE.

Woohoo, another chapter! I am very glad that this is being updated and am reading with great interest. Congratulations on continuing the writing. :)

Why do people love it so much? Maybe it's because we're Ace fans and we love reading a new story set in the fandom. Maybe we just want to see the answer to the eternal question: 'So what happened next?' Anyway, I *do* find your story worth reading. If you don't agree, maybe you could edit it, solicit more constructive criticism, or start a different Ace story, or rewrite it from a different point of view? No story and no author is perfect but I want to read more of your work. I hope this isn't too fandom-evangelistic of me, but if you want to show up at the messageboard or download episodes from the livejournal community, you'll be very welcome. (Also: nice dolls you linked from your profile!)

I think that the way you wrote the children as having different reactions to moving to Conestoga Hills was quite good. I also like the characterization in Zero's line about Pete's heartbreak. I suppose she's the character dating Pete? Saying she expects her boyfriend to be heartbroken at her departure shows an interesting aspect of character. I was also very happy when you described the job offer as Fiona's rather than Simon's; respecting Fiona's career is really lovely to see.

It's also rather realistic to see a character showing interest in working for the Carnival (much like Sam briefly did!). To briefly go into faultfinding, I'll point out that the Carnival didn't even open until a day or two after Mark moved in, so Raven probably couldn't have spent her money there, though getting a job is fine. Overall also, when you write, you could try to specify more things, eg. make it clear whether Raven or Zero is dating Pete, maybe add in a few more details. For example, instead of "I walked down our street...[and] a dog started following me", "I walked down the American street through a row of brown-painted houses that all looked identical to me. A small, weasel-like dog started yipping at me; I looked back to see disgusting lumps it had left behind on the pavement." But too much detail is just as bad as too little, so it's not at all a bad thing that your writing style is relatively sparse.

Anyway, sorry for the long review! Good luck for future writing.

Ahh, keep up the good work! Great way to leave us wanting further. I'd be well freaked out if I was Raven and knew what was in the series.

This story has potential, you should continue it. Please update soon, so I can read more! Quite a different view point. I can't wait to see where this goes...

While I'm still struggling to put my appreciation for this story into words, I would just like to say that your contribution to the section has been thoroughly digested and more is awaited eagerly.

hi, this is like one of my faveorites in the hole section, i want to find out what happens next, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE continu if u can. i want to know how they get on w/ mark and who they end up with. twins r such a cool idea. rockin story!