Not bad! Would love to see more on how Henry feels. And has he had sex before?

I agree with a lot of the previous reviews; this was an interesting idea, but the lack of accurate characterization and the poor spelling and grammar make it too difficult to accept. Eliza makes it a point to reiterate to Higgins that she is a good girl...good girls generally don't give hand-jobs randomly during meals.

It's a pity that there really aren't any well-written MFL smut stories out there, but, in all honesty, I doubt that the characters would really allow themselves to fall into the realm of smut. They're too stubborn. Hm.

Eliza and I. What an insult to Higgins and the English language. Psh.

Loved the film. So glad you gave one of my favourite pairing a happy ending. Thanks for writing and sharing.

I usually disregard stories I don't like, but here I am, writing this review. They were so out of character it made the story hard to believe. It's really choppy and the grammar, along with quite a bit of spelling, made it difficult to follow.

Henry and Eliza dance around each other throughout the entire film (and musical) so the entrance was...shady, to say the least.

The descriptions were beautiful, but are put on the back burner throughout the story.

Both characters firmly believe that they are right, and the other is wrong, so Henry should really have an internal conflict before he says something as powerful as "I love you."

Don't forget "to vs too" either, dear.

I hope they had such a happy ending after the movie finished. Great story!

Haha, ohy the trecherous banging. xD This was amazing. (: I loved it.

Clever, but how unlikely... Our 'enry and Heliza will have something better than what u can even imagine...

i like it. its not really how i thought how the characters would act but still its well written. i love the movie. haha keep writing ]

I am in agreement with the last two reviews, and the one thing that I can pick out that I think would definately help the piece is: change "me and Eliza", to 'Eliza and I'.

Although I agree that much of the behaviour is out of character, I do think that you have potential! I also think that for a one shot; it's worth reading.

Keep writing, and don't let yourself become discouraged. X

I suppose I am glad that you've shown the passion that I do believe is between Higgins and Eliza but I have to agree with Lili completely. It's entirely out of character. Higgins would never express his emotions so clearly and Eliza would never give up her virginity so quickly and easily. They're passionate but not quite in that way. Lili's also right that they would speak differently. You have to be especially careful with Higgins because he's a language professor and everything. I would suggest watching the movie and reading the other stories to get a better feel for them if you ever decide to write an MFL story again. Though I do get the feeling that this was just a smutty oneshot (which I am okay with since there wasn't one for MFL yet). Also, there are some grammar and spelling errors that could be easily fixed.

Sorry about that but this is a OOC story if ever I saw one- I usually dont comment on stuff I dont like but your style isnt bad, so it would be nice if you wrote more but if you do try and stick to the disclaimers, I mean what good is it to write about characters that already exist if you dont care about anything you know about them? The play the musical is based on is set in 1913, the characters talk differently and act differently than they would do today, perhaps you should re- watch the movie and try and adept some of the speaking terms and analyze what the characters might or might not do.

(Oh and there are more MFL stories, just press search and enter it as a keyword, you will find them at Plays/Musicals.)

Cool. I liked the film and always wondered why there wasn't a fanfic for it but now thanks to you there is. Love the story, and the lemon!