I think this is good the way it is. This pairing is very rare, but that's what makes it great. I say you should keep it as it is. Wonderful fic, keep it up. BG

ACCEPT HIM! I LOVE THAT PAIRING!

Haha, I can just see Ryan doing that. XD

I like this story alot. Please continue!

hahahahahaha! your disclaimer is awesome! I was thinking the same thing! update soon! it was cool

Don't sell yourself short, this isn't all that bad. The chapters are a little short, but it's understandable. It can be difficult to churn out thousands of words for one chapter, after all.

Happy to see you try to include all of the ghosts in the conversations. All too often it's only the fan favourites-Jackal, Juggernaut, Prince, Princess-who get any attention. And oh my god, Jimmy shouting out "Deal what about a deal" was classic. You've certainly got a knack for dialog, but be careful and try to remember-many of these ghosts were born in different time periods, and would speak differently from the others, in a less modern way, if that makes sense.

A tip-don't caps lock exclamations. They're distracting and sort of silly, generally, and an exclamation mark at the end of a sentence is sufficient notice to the reader that the character's voice is raised. Only other thing I could think of to tell you is to try to beef up descriptions(of thoughts, settings, whatever it may be), and to not try to develop relationships too quickly. There's no rush after all.

Good luck, and don't give up, you're doing great.

Who ever told you your writing's bad was talking out their ass.This is awsome.

love you're story. please continue

Thank you for your review, now I feel like writting some more, so here's a review for you =D:

Ohhoho! DanaxHorace? Now this is a paring that I've yet to read about, I wait patienly for the next chapter, and don't worry about the length of the chapters, for me, it's the writting that counts, and this story's got potential, especially because it's unique... and, y'know, Ryan's in it. Typing of the Jackal, Susan had better be nice to him and Horace 'less she wants an angry fangirl on her heels. mrawr.

From one 13 Ghosts fan to another: Keep up the good work =D

O. A cliffhanger. They are fun. I can't wait to see what happens ^.^
I don't see why you are so iffy about your writing. Its well done.

Nice story. I hope you update soon ^.^