 Expecting Rain 2009-08-06 . chapter 8This was a cute idea - I love that his surprise party is the one and only mystery that Tintin can't solve! Everyone was very in-character, and I especially liked your Snowy - you convey his attitude perfectly. I liked your Calculus as well - I loved him mistaking Chang's name for "Champagne." I have to say that I consider Tintin to be a good deal younger (late teens/early twenties) but his age is definitely ambiguous so I have no problem with you making him a bit older. If you write another fic I'd suggest making longer chapters - this one probably could have been condensed into one or two. Your grammar is a bit iffy too, so you might want to have someone read over your next story for mistakes. Overall though I really enjoyed this story, good job! |