AW! i love zero! why is he being such a jerk? why wont he tell her? ah! i hate this! he should just go up to her later and apologize and tell her what he knows. stupid idiot. anyway! i like this story! i love that toga is her dad! i look foward to your next update!

This sucks. Firstly, making all your words bold shows that you don't know how to use Microsoft Word or whatever writing software that you are using.

Secondly, your grammar sucks. Go and get an English teacher. Or a good beta that can catch all the mistakes in each of your sentences.

Thirdly, OOC-ness is obvious. You evidently have never read the manga or watched the anime. Looking at the characters and thinking that "omg they hawt 8D!" does not mean that you can write a story on them.

P.S. I take things like "plz no flames" as a personal challenge.

I don't understand. Why both Toga and Cross are her fathers while we all know that she's a pureblood ?