I think I've read this before, not sure why I never reviewed it. I loved it! I love the little twist at the end, it was brilliant!

*PPT*

I love it! 3

I loved the way you worded everything in the story, and how Draco acted. It was great ! (:

Lia, this is uproarious! I have so many favorite lines:

-He then let his right hand travel downward and surreptitiously pulled at his collar, allowing three buttons to pop undone. Only three, mind you. It was a rule. You show them three, and they beg you for four.-

And basically, any mention of buttons after that because it's one of those character quirks that so perfectly encapsulates cracky!Draco. XD

Then there's:

-He would have to check his ego lest he adopt obsessive-compulsive behaviourism to combine with his acute narcissism.-

Which is brilliant! Way to capture the near-stream of consciousness rambling of a narcissistic pretty!boy.

And then this the part where I died. DIED, I tell you:

-He wasn't about to sit there and watch this girl tease him until his gentlemen below fired a twenty-one gun salute in his cashmere Egyptian-cotton trousers.-

Best crack!fic I've ever read, my dear! Terrific job!

I love this one, I love everyone you do but this one is Deffinitely one of your best. I would love to see the same storyline from Ginny's perspective like you mentioned on your profile.

Love Always and Keep Writing!

Unlaced xxx

*faints*

I think I haven't read anything yours before, but I'm glad I did now.

Your Draco is such a poser, so seemingly shallow and automated that actually resembles a robot. Which is why I love it that Ginny kind of shakes him out of that universe

You have some pretty fantastic lines, also. Really creative, and witty... and they fit perfectly!

But, back to the point; your descriptions of Draco, his way of thinking, of acting, all of it until the very moment he starts interacting with Ginny is, probably, a very accurate way of showing what I think would be canon Draco, had Rowling shown his personality a bit more (which, of course, wasn't going to happen).

Because, come on! Canon Draco is not really what I have in mind when I think of Perfect! Draco. But your characterization was really "gettin' there" (to canon) .

Confused? LOL, sorry.

But it was all perfect, to sum up.

...and I always love him a bit dazzled, bewildered, at some point ;P

Wow, Lia, that was wonderful! You're such a gifted writer, I hope you know. Even in a ligthearted, hilarious fic such as this your talents as a writer become quite obvious.

You really have a way with words! And I love that you use words like 'castigated' in your fics. :D

This one was HILARIOUS. I have to say, this is not my idea of Draco AT ALL - seriously, *make-up*? - but I love the fact that despite Draco being at his sleaziest, slimiest, most representatively Slytherin in the worst of ways, you STILL managed to make him likable to me.

I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE your description of Ginny through Draco's eyes, and I especially love the voice you gave her. It's great to see a Ginny with a back-bone, one that convinces me beyond a shadow of a doubt that she can hold her own against a Malfoy and even beat him at his own game.

I love that she turned the tables on him, and how he starts out dripping self-confidence, completely sure of himself, only to end up sounding like a beffudled schoolboy.

The thing that intrigues me most about this fic, however, is why this Ginny would want to be 'something more' for this Draco - what did she see in him that made her want to pursue him, other than the challenge, and the fact that he's gorgeous? If she had offered him an amazing shag, no strings attached, I would understand why she'd want it, and I would also hope that they'd ultimately become something more. But the fact that she wants something serious with him ALREADY implies that she must have seen something in him, someting beyond the smooth-talking playboy facade, some specific qualities that make her want him for a partner. I wonder what it is! *squints at Draco*

Definitely great job with this one. I think my favorite part was the bird shit line. That whole part was funny as hell. Great job! _

LOVED IT, Lia! XD That was the most excellent way to display your Clawness. :)

I loved Draco in here. He was so confident, so self-assured, so CONCEITED-it was hard NOT to like him. ;) His complaints about the different houses had me cracking up-it was too funny. LOL.

"Right. Smirk. Merlin had nothing on him." I really liked this statement. I was laughing so hard-that is SO Draco.

I really liked how Draco was all pissed at himself because he kept thinking about Ginny in a way that was not deemed appropriate for a conquest.

"Hmm, well perhaps her hair wasn't thatorange, and maybe he had judged too quickly when he made the comment about her complexion. She had a peasant charm to her that made her somewhat attractive in her own subtle way – for a Weasley, that is." I liked this one-I could just hear the reluctance and hidden lust in Draco's voice. LOL.

Draco's panic when Gin wasn't falling for his sexiness was hysterical. I could just hear the hysteric tone to his thoughts as he tried to reassure himself he was still sexy-and that something was clearly wrong with the Weasley. LOL.

You have BIRD-SHIT on your SHOULDER! -collapses into hysterics- Oh, that was classic. I loved it! XD

Oh, Ginny, that TEASE. That's my girl. -proud smile- I never thought that she would have it in her to do something like that-but once again, she surprises me. Poor Draco, having to be on the end of that torture.

Draco's shock at being discovered was nice to watch. Karma's a bitch, and all that noise.

Oh, Ginny's beautiful AND observant! Kudos to her!

Oh, that was a NICE kiss. -licks lips- Me likey. Ah, Lia, you bring out the voyeur in me. ;)

Draco's was PLAYED. That's my girl, Ginny! Get your man!

Fantastic job, Lia. I loved this! Kim should be pleased. u_u

Sid

Genius. I loved it. The right amount of romance and the right amount of believability. You did your characterizations excellently. Excellent work!

I love this! If you ever decide to write another chapter then I will be waiting for it :)

Lia, I think this is one of your best. I actually had to cover my mouth to stop from laughing out loud. (That wouldn't have been a good idea where I am right now...) The dry wit really came through on this one, and you did an excellent job with it. I especially enjoyed Draco's little "Checklist" in the beginning and the bird droppings on his shoulder. Very fitting, and very funny.

Both Draco and Ginny were very much in character, and I like how you didn't write Ginny as being overly attractive. That lends the story a bit of weight to see how she changes in his eyes and makes it more believable. That's something difficult to do in a one-shot which I think you've achieved quite well here.

Also, the teasing scene with the strawberry and Blaise's "Draco, you lucky bastard" comment made me laugh. I could definitely picture what was going on and to see those two Slyths all worked up over a Gryff was great. Lioness indeed.

My favorite line: "Humans were meant to shag, eat, and sleep. Rinse and repeat."

Overall, great job. Two thumbs up!

Lunar Fire

Haha, this was AWESOME! It was perfect, Draco was a jerk and he was adorable, Ginny was amazing, the strawberries were tasty. :D

Totally, loved it.

"Patented Malfoy-smirk? M yes, love. Wink, wink. You know that's a definite 'Check'!"

LOL.

"Right. Smirk. Merlin had nothing on him."

Definitely not.

"Humans were meant to shag, eat, and sleep. Rinse and repeat. What more was there to be had?"

Rinse and repeat? LOLOL!

"His mind had tumbled back into that those murky waters of – what was it called again – praise"

Hehe! Draco isn't that familiar with admiring someone else, huh?

It was so stupid, the way he was trying to flirt with her and how it didn't work! And yet it was totally Draco. Kudos!

"He looked over at his left shoulder and cursed under his breath. He did have bird shit on him."

Laughed hard at that.

Good job!

Okay, reviewing as a I read, so it might sound a bit disjointed...

I'm loving the way you started this. I've been snickering away to myself since the first sentence, but a few of my favourites:

"Cheek bones high and softly tinted with a manly shade of rouge? Check."

Of course, it's a 'manly' shade of rouge.

"Patented Malfoy-smirk? M yes, love. Wink, wink. You know that's a definite 'Check'!"

LOL! Need I say more?

Hahahaahahaa, oh gosh. I don't think I'm even going to be able to describe to you how much I'm enjoying this. I read on and start laughing even more. I love it how you say being a player is so 'plebian', and then the whole part about what they call him in the heat of passion. *snorts*

"He would have to make do with his Italian and French hand-tailored clothes. It was a burden he would have to bear, but as for wearing it, he would wear it well. It was the least he could do for the females of Hogwarts."

*wipes away tears* This is great, and I just LOVE it when people throw in lines like this. It's so Draco, and just so adorably cocky.

That line about the buttons was brilliant! You capture his voice perfectly. I can just imagine him thinking that!

"It was time to dig his well-manicured fingers into the warm pie of something a bit more spicy."

*snorts* My brain took that so dirtily I think I may have dipped more than a toe in the gutters of EL.

Haha, his assessment of Hufflepuffs is hilarious. And I love the fact you add the little part of it being his 'sensible opinion'. It adds a nice touch.

"She would keep her moralistic gob shut. She wouldn't want the others to know that she had been rooting in the nest of a snake."

Lol. I don't think I need to even explain why that one made me laugh.

"Well, not too quick mind you. He wasn't known for his stamina due to his circling of the Quidditch pitch, if you caught the drift."

*SNORT!* That is classic! I really think you're doing a wonderful job of capturing Draco's arrogant thoughts, mixed with the more dry, witty inserts of the narrator. It makes a lovely combination, and I am enjoying it immensely.

I love the description of Miss Weasley. This one had me cracking up:

"She had freckles and pale skin, which – again – could have been labelled as cute if it didn't seem as though her tanning method was simply lying beneath a screen door."

You certainly have a knack for descriptions, but what I love most about this is that it is not gushy and overly poetical. I hate it when people have Draco waxing poetic over Ginny's looks. Yours sounds like something he would say. Love you for that.

Hehe, Draco the stalker. I like the fact you note it is a 'disturbing' fact. It gives a hint that something is different with this girl, but that he hasn't quite realised it yet.

"This would simply not do. He would have to check his ego lest he adopt obsessive-compulsive behaviourism to combine with his acute narcissism. There were far too many isms and not enough asms for his liking!"

LOL! That is brilliant!

Ha! His attempts at denial are wonderful. I like the fact you call them 'murky waters' of praise. O, I'm liking this. You're showing that he's caring a bit more for her (or at least finding her a bit more attractive) without having him lose any of his character in the process. Beautifully done.

"He would have to have a chat with both his imagination and his libido later on. Attraction was one thing, but infatuation was an entirely different Quidditch pitch that he didn't want to play on."

First of all, the beginning of this line is great! I love the fact you use the word libido. It always seems so Malfoy-ish to use words that are, shall we say, less commonly used and show a bit more intelligence in vocabulary. But I also like the bringing in of a 'wizard' saying. Many fanfic authors (and I have done this sometimes too) use our own 'muggle' sayings and phrases, but, of course, the wizarding world wouldn't have that. I think what you have done here makes it seem more real and allows the magical world to feel real, as if it has its own sayings and such.

"(Weasley hues and Weasley flecks, which, of course, were unattractive)."

*snorts* Of course.

The encounter was everything I expected it to be. I love the fact he tries to pull out the charm and she is unphased by it all. I also love the fact that he then starts to worry if he has more than three buttons undone, and begins to doubt his game. And then, of course, he comes to the conclusion that SHE is the one who has something wrong with her. Typical Draco conclusion.

"“You have bird shit on your shoulder,” she said absently with a mild look of interest and then looked him up and down with absolutely no interest and walked past him."

OMG! HAHAHAHA! I was not expecting that, but that is brilliant! Poor Draco. Oo, yeah, he's so sexy all the birds want a piece of him. (*cough* yes, I know that was corny, and such a bad pun) I love the fact she just dismisses him. Ah, I'm just loving this!

Heheheehe, Ginny is such a little minx. Taunting him like that. This is hilarious!

"He wasn't about to sit there and watch this girl tease him until his gentlemen below fired a twenty-one gun salute in his cashmere-Egyptian cotton trousers."

Haha, I was very glad I wasn't eating or drinking anything when I read that.

Aww, I like the change where he realises he can't use his rehearsed speeches on her. Very cute, but still true to his character.

Nice banter. I'm loving Ginny in this.

SHE KISSED HIM! *laughs* And while he was talking. Yep, I love your Ginny.

"His eyes were still closed, and he was leaning forward with his lips swollen and pursed in the shape of one ready to either be kissed or one who was still expecting the kiss to last."

Aww, that's such a cute image. I love this even more because it's normally Ginny who is left in this situation. That's why I was so interested to see the roles reversed, and you've done that wonderfully!

"It was in that moment he knew that he had been deceived; he had been played. She, the hunted, had now become the huntress, and he, he had become her prey."

What a perfect way to end this!

Okay, so I'm sure you've realised now that I adored this fic. Draco was spot on, and you captured the transition of his thoughts perfectly. I loved the little snarky comments thrown in, and I loved the way you portrayed Ginny and had her steadily manipulate him into becoming the 'prey'.

This was perfect and was exactly the kind of thing I was aiming for. And you wrote it for me. *squee*

Loved this, and I am most definitely adding it to my favourites!

Thank you so much for writing this!

Okay, this has to be the funniest story I have ever read on here. Granted, I am quite new (to signing up), but I have read (and been read ) a fair amount of Draco-Ginny stories, and this has to be one of my favourites.

Some of your internal verbalising (in the narrative) is so scarily accurate that if I didn't see your name listed as Lia on your profile, I would assume you were a man. No offence meant by that. I know how your femme-types are [pauses] ... Yes, what I meant is that your Draco does think like a guy. At least a highly effeminate metro-esque (possibly gay) guy. [Refer to "Cheek bones high and softly tinted with a manly shade of rouge."]

Honestly, there are too many lines for me to go through and remark on how wonderfully witty and pithy they were. [I know, I can feel my lips on your ass as I type.] I liked how you worked the entire story off the lyrics [White Stripes kicks ass] and even worked many of the words and lines from the lyrics into the story itself.

There were a few lines that made me smirk, and which ultimately drew me into your humorous tale [dry wit indeed]:

"He never referred to himself as such as the term “player” was so plebeian, and a Malfoy was anything but. He was a Conquistador. What the ladies called him, in the heat of passion, was less imaginative – often breathless and elated moans and screams of 'Oh Merlin'.

Right. Smirk. Merlin had nothing on him." [You are such an ass. ;) Plebeian! HA! I think I actually snorted while reading this. Conquistador? Nice. I will now refer to myself as such.]

"He then let his right hand travel downward and surreptitiously pulled at his collar, allowing for three buttons to pop undone. Only three, mind you. It was a rule. You show them three, and they beg you for four." [Really? Shit, I need to buy me some of those Oxfords and make sure the first three are unbuttoned.]

“He wasn't about to sit there and watch this girl tease him until his gentlemen below fired a twenty-one gun salute in his cashmere-Egyptian cotton trousers.” [Twenty-one gun salute? I actually laughed fairly hard at that and then felt guilty afterwards. As someone who is in the Armed Forces, I don‘t think I will ever feel the same at funerals.]

As for the bird shit incident? Priceless. [Offers a thumbs up]

I hope you liked my review. It was my first. [Be gentle, I‘m fragile]

Keanan