THAT was brilliant! I seriously have no idea how you come up with these ideas, and this was pure genious. I don't even know where to start because every sentence was amazing. I love the closing line, it was perfect.

You're insane. I kinda like it. :P

"I just had to get this outta my head."

If this were in my head I would have kept it there to laugh at and enjoy! Freakin' funny! Where are Jasper and Alice?

i feel deliciously de-canoned. that's cuz you're awesome. :)