Salut Lyxie,
Voilà, je viens de lire cette histoire tout d'une traite, et j'en suis encore toute retournée.
Par où commencer ... Tout d'abord, magnifique prologue qui nous donne déjà l'atmosphère et envie de découvrir la suite.
Ecrire cette histoire sous forme de journal personnel (du POV de Hutch)est une super idée. Toute l'histoire est bien construite : de la vie sans nuages, on passe à la tragédie, puis à la lente descente aux enfers de Hutch. Celle-ci se fait par étape, et on plonge lentement mais irrémédiablement avec lui. C'est terrible, ça fait peur, ça prend aux tripes, mais on aime ça, avoir peur.
Quels magnifiques chapitres que les 6 et 7 !
C'est le souffle de Starsky qui sauve Hutch ... sa présence est-elle réelle, ou simplement fantomatique, télépatique ? Le mystère reste entier, c'est très bien.
Les phrases très courtes, voir faites d'un seul mot, donnent un rythme pesant et haletant à la fois. On a le souffle court, on est à ce moment DANS la peau de Hutch.
Très bel épilogue, enfin, qui referme cette histoire sur une note d'espoir, une lueur positive, sans tomber dans un euphorisme extravagant.
Un grand bravo à toi Lyxie ! Pour un coup d'essai, c'est un coup de maitre !

Bonjour Chers prolixius:
Je suis content que j'ai lu les déclarations prospectives au texte, d'abord.
Un chapitre lourd d'émotions brutes.
Magnifiquement couches!
Authentique, multi-Angst dimensions.
Tu tisses dans des éléments tout aussi habilement que le chef d'orchestre d'une symphonie.

Merci.
L.

Encore Merci pour tes histoires...Tu es vraiment un bon écrivain (je ne sais pas si ça se dit au féminin).
Continues comme ça, j'apprécie beaucoup.

Bisous

A bientôt sur le forum, je pense que je pourrai y faire un tour bientôt mes journées seront moins chargées.

I'm finally catching up on reading this very dramatic and angst-filled story. I think you brought it around by the end to a very sweet, teary moment--a lovely reunion. So glad to see my honey Hutch out of his agony, and that Starsky gifted him with getting out of that wheelchair. I did get a little choked up right there. Hey- and congrats on finishing your first multi-chapter story and for taking the leap to post in English! Welcome!

you did a great job with this! I think you learned a lot by the time you finished this story and I'm already looking forward to your next one.

Thank you so much for posting this.

becky

That was so beautifull...think I need a tissue now! You did a great job and don't forget to write a sequel!
Big Hugs
Nicole

just knew it would work out in the end brought tears to my eyes well done, waiting for your next one.

I really can't wait for the story I'm so glad that Starsky came back to Hutch now I will have to wait for the sequel until then thanks

WONDERFUL-WONDERFUL-WONDERFUL As I contemplate writing my life,s story I could not have written THIS piece any better. Lyxie this entire story was wonderful,Thank you for sharing this with us ALL.Regards XOX Robert A. Collins ( The Sheriff)

Ah, that was a beautiful ending! I think you did a great job of describing what was in Hutch's mind, and the ending was just perfect. Thanks so much for posting this, and I look forward to the other things you've got planned :-)

Hugs,
Emma

I just love this chapter you could really fill his pain I only hope that Starsky will be there to help him.

There definately is a future for you as a writer! Your stories are true to heart and vivid with details!Always as if I am there. BRAVO! Regards,The Sheriff

I am really enjoying this. It's creative and different and I can't wait for more!

Please update soon!

Becky

Yeah, been looking forward to this chapter! So glad that this was why it went dark at the end of the last chapter. Really enjoyed this chapter, a lot of interesting thoughts in it. Can't wait for the next.

Wow, you're really getting into Hutch's head. Can't wait to read more.