Ah, and if I may add, my cringing wasn't due to any misrepresentation on your part, but my own perception of these characters, namely Yami. But I seem to acknowledge him for the teenager he was bound to be, not for the self righteous, arrogant, proper, yet pitiful tool of Destiny that I left him at.

I had reservations about reading your story, but I was never one to ignore an author's commitment in the form of chapter length. Though I never had liked the set couple of this tale, I've been taken aback and thoroughly pleased with it. Not only is it convincing in its own right, but it was enjoyable to see you have fun with it. I enjoyed - though admittedly cringed - at the voices you've given the characters and find myself excited to the close of this story. It will be sad to see it come to a close and, much like Pegasus, I would hope to stay with the adventures of the virtual world you and your buddy had taken time to breathe life to. I hope to meet the next update soon, and hope you are well as well. Thank you for taking this story to heart and seeing it through to even this point. It bring me the same melancholy and satisfaction of the original tale of Yugioh.

Your fic "Newly Revised Book of the Dead" has been on my favorites list for a very long time. It's immensely difficult to find decently written YGO fanfic, and even more difficult to find one that's original and complex. Your works are usually all three.
This fic was one I didn't want to get into for whatever reason, likely because the premise didn't grab me at first, but I did when I saw that it had been recently updated (after a reread of NRBotD). I think your strength is in character development and world-building, and these are the best aspects about this story- the world has rules and you follow them, and a lot of those rules bring interesting and funny features to the story. I think your weak point is plot advancement- as much as I'm enjoying reading this, I'm going slightly crazy waiting for something big to happen (and for someone to explain the darn worm beast). I have to say I'm glad a monster finally came out of a summoning rune... They have to learn not to stand in front of those. Finally, I'm proud that I predicted that Pegasus didn't plan on leaving when he first entered the game, and that that would be the solution to the Yami/Yugi split. I think your story leaves lots of questions, but enough things are predictable that the reader feels like they're clued in.
How many chapters do you think there will be in total? I almost wish I'd waited to read this when it was complete, so I wouldn't be wringing my hands about what's going to happen.
Best of luck completing this one, anyway.

This story has got to be the best one I've read on ff. I love your technique and writing style. Also the way you have built the cheracters and plot are just...amazing! The challenges are great as well as the romances. I think I'm in love with your story. And I'm not one for gushing but hear it is...*gushes* I defiantly love the whole Kiaba/Seto and Yami relationship. Please continue to write because I'm addicted to this drug that is your amazing tale of friendship, love, sacrifice, and adventure.

Excellent chapter as usual. The interaction between Kaiba and Bakura was interesting. I guess Bakura should have reeked his vengence on Kaiba since high priest Seto's father was the real culprit. The talk between Grampa and Yami was interesting. Gramps was right that Yami had developed his own moral compass starting with the duel on the tower against Kaiba at duelist kingdom, becoming more independent from Yugi's influence.
Looking forward to more!

Wonderful stuff, it's always worth the wait :)

I like the further exploration of the similarities between Yami and Kaiba, especially with Sugoroku also noting them. Yami just doesn't realise how equally culpable he is at times of underestimating the importance of his own needs. His life has value and is equally precious, instead he puts others before himself too much - even though he often deprecates that in Kaiba. Both suffer from plenty of self-doubt too, despite outward arrogance. I very much enjoyed all this - and the foreshadowing of blue-eyes and Bakura revelations too.

I think Yami has hopefully come to the correct realisation about Pegasus...it would be cruel to take him away from his only chance to be with Cecelia, that's all he's ever wanted and he's devoted his existence since her death to making it happen. He has the right to make his own choices as much as anyone else.

Another great chapter, can't wait for the next, looking forward to the events to come ;)

I get why Yami would be upset about "stealing" Pegasus' chance at life in order to gain it for himself, even though Pegasus isn't really making it a choice - he's staying regardless of whether or not Yami goes back. I guess it took some time for it to really sink in, and for Yami and Kaiba to find time to talk about it.

I never thought that there'd be much in common between Kaiba and TK Bakura but you have a good point: Kaiba understands the desire to achieve a goal like revenge, to the point where nothing else matters.

The funny thing with Sugoroku's section is the CSNY song "Teach Your Children" keeps running through my head everytime I read it. I love his observation that maybe he's just there for troubled young men to talk to, and I like that he really tries to get Yami to consider what he wants, outside of Yugi's influence.

Kaiba made Bakura doubt and think. I wonder if they will ever figure out it was Seto's father who ordered the massacre. He was punished by Zorc. I hope that Bakura can leave his vengeance behind and find peace.

It's taken me a while to review this chapter. Not that I didn't like it, just alot to think about.

In someways Bakura and Kaiba are alot alike. Each carries around their ghosts. Kaiba is in the process of ridding himself of some of them (he can't get rid of them all, otherwise he wouldn't be himself) while Bakura holds on to his with all his might.

I think you've given a good juxtaposition here in showing this.

I'm sure I've brought this up somewhere, but as far as I can recall Bakura is the only Yugioh character that is never saved or redeemed. Not counting Gozabura who never faced Yugi/Yami , Peagsus, Dartz, Noa, Seigfried, Malik(I can never remember which one is the yami side so if it is the wrong name, you still know what I'm on about) Amelda, Ralphel, Valon, all are redeemed in the end. I'm not going to count Akunadin in this because he too never faced Yami and Yugi together. But Bakura has in the present.

So what is it about Bakura that can't be saved. Is it the fact he can't let go or the message that somethings/people are beyond saving.

I'm still kinda hoping here that some of the things that Ryou said to him will sink in. After all if Ryou can rejoin the world, perhaps his courage in facing him will get him to at least think, if not rethink what he was told.

Really an emotional chapter.
Hope all is well at your end
bahen

As fun as a more literal dungeon would've been, this makes much more sense as a foundation, and I appreciate getting a sneak peak of Kaiba's past since it's something we get very little of in the anime and yet really shapes who he grows up to be. And it obviously makes much more of an impact on Yami to see just how harsh and impersonal and unfair life had been, than if he had simply heard about it. It just make their lovemaking scene that much more special, because it drives home the point that their relationship is about emotional fulfillment as well as physical attraction.

Then of course Yami has to bring up his earlier conversation with Yugi, but I think Kaiba understands better than anyone what it means to place someone before one's self. So although it would've meant Yami breaking his word to Kaiba to go back to how things were, I think Kaiba also expects Yami to stay true to who he is, and respects Yami for that. And although Yami's wishing Kaiba didn't place his own welfare last, that's just how he is, even before Gozaburo or the orphanage. Yami's the same way; he's just not thinking about that.

Poor Ryou Bakura, I keep forgetting he exists in this story (even Honda got an avatar, even if it's completely plain). But at least here Ryou's getting the chance to confront his past so that he can move on - the spirit of the Ring is unable to do the same. I know I should say more, but let's face it, my eyes are always elsewhere : )

Excellent! I read this far in one sitting, can't wait to read the rest!

I'm sorry I haven't been reviewing lately, the real world likes to keep us busy in the funniest ways.

Any-who.

What a splendid job you've done my dear! I loved the idea of Kaiba and Yami making love in the orphanage. That was truly a beautifully twisted image.

And Ryou! Oh my dear little Ryou. I was very happy to see you made a scene where he and the spirit actually confront each other. I wish it was longer, I wish there was more detail, but in truth you said all that you could and illustrated it wonderfully.

So as always I enjoyed these chapters immensely, and I applaud you for your never ending originality. Thank you so much for keeping up with this fantastic story, and I once more apologize for my lack of praise. You deserve a lot better, and I promise to try harder to deliver.

This chapter was just fabulous.

The exploration of Kaiba's orphanage memories was such a great choice. His past with Gozaburo was so awful and had such obvious effects that it is easy to forget what his other childhood experiences might have done to his psyche. I have always thought about his abandonment issues in regard to this, but you were spot on that the helplessness and sense of disregard would have been possibly even more powerful for Kaiba and have shaped him in some ways. I utterly agree with the sense you created - that in some ways he could deal more easily with the pain of life with his foster father's cruelties than the feeling of being nothing at all, of not mattering. Once free of all of it, those memories would still add fuel to so many of the traits and struggles we know he has now.

Loved the Yami 'comforting' method, the scene was very sexy but also full of emotion (I'm taking notes lol), Kaiba's desire for the closeness and reaffirmation of their bond shows how far he has come. I liked the exploration of Yami's actions of the last chapter too, as I thought at the time that he was falling into the same mindset he wants to save Kaiba from. It is not surprising that Kaiba would understand - perhaps even more than Yami realised - Kaiba is used to considering himself second, but in this case he did recognise that Yami (and previously himself) had made mistakes...and Kaiba's last line, just mmmmm... wonderful stuff.

I enjoyed the Ryou/Bakura interaction too. I find it interesting to speculate how Bakura could be if he had a different past, or could let go. I also think that in the same way that he had an effect on Ryou during his 'tenancy', there would be some effect in the other direction...even if he doesn't realise it. Fascinated to see what comes of this.

Another brilliant update! As ever - I'm now greedy for the next though - thank you so much for this ;)

It took a while, but the wait was worth it. I like how you are slowly revisiting those with a harsh past, and allowing them to move on in their own unique manner.

I hope Bakura takes Ryou's words to heart. It would be of great advantage to Seto and Yami. In any case, I am glad that Ryou came there and they are going out for burgers. I think, Seto is starting to believe in Yami's love and is accepting of his faults and mistakes.