I apologize beforehand, but I've gotta say ... I keep rereading this fic and I feel like rambling about it some more, so I hope you don't mind!
I think the POV I like best is actually Yuri's, but mostly because everything Yuri does doesn't seem to be utter jerkass-ness, whereas it IS when you look at it from anyone else's POV. Other than that, Luke is so ... cute? Eager? Trying to do his best but slowly crumbling under it all? This came to a head in the AU of your fic (AU of an AU ... AAU?), but I can't wait to see the other's reactions to Akzeriuth (as horrible as that is for Luke...). There's mentions of them in that AAU, but reading about it happening will be all the more poignant...
Your messing with geography and history is kind of funny. I played Abyss, but not Vesperia, so I'm playing "spot the Abyss reference!" throughout the fic. You make it work pretty well, for all that they're almost mutually exclusive systems.
What are my favorite bits... I liked it when Luke got his "new" costume (or, for us readers, returned to his original costume!) XD I also liked it when Yuri actually expressed some concern for Luke (in the beginning of the last chapter).
I find Guy's inclusion interesting, but his interaction doesn't meld that well with the rest of the party members. I like Guy, but in this fic, his lines are sparse and come only when the others have nothing to add.
On the side, I think sort of treat this story as an experiment on what would Luke be like if he actually tried, rather than be a spoiled brat for the beginning of Abyss. I like the Luke in this fic. It's like ... post cutting-hair already, except without a few major realizations.
Wow, I completely blabbed your head off XD I think this should be all!
PS: Were there originally section dividers in this fic? The POV jumps takes a bit to get used to.
Haha, I just read your AN. Rather, I read that fic first, and then this one, and I had a moment of "Ooh, I get it now!" XDDD
I really like the way you melded the two universes. I think it's interesting that Luke (here) is more ... Asch than Luke is in canon. I mean, he's more snippity, less selfish, etc. Yuri honestly bothers me a bit, but I think it's because of his core personality, even in (what it sounds like is) canon, so your characterization is probably spot on XD
omigosh : D i am so happy to read this. i started reading it and loved it from the beginning and its not until this chapter that i noticed it was written by-you! ive also read some of your other fics and completely loved them. no wonder this story was so good i cant wait to see more of it! 3
Re-reading this chapter I have to say I love how much time Raven has been getting. He's a Ves character I happen to like a lot and I love seeing all the hints you throw in about his role in your story. Such as knowing about the God-Generals or the Yulia hymns (oh I'm going to be happy if/when you reveal he just might be related to Yulia... even if it gives me a wierd image of him singing in Tear's place for Luke, which is actually turning out to be cool). You've definetly given Raven a unique role here with his blending of Ves and new Abyss history (which I find done well so far) and I am interested in seeing how this affects his character choices in the long run. I'm also curious about how he might change due to his invlovement with Luke's problems. Raven, for the most part, seemed to have issues with commitment and here early on Luke is already pulling him in without meaning to and later on (I think I forgot to mention this in another review) asking for real commitment to him. You certainly have put Raven in more of a mess early on since none of the other Ves cast at this point have put Raven in a position of truly needing him like Luke does. Bravo. Put that man to work (unlike lazy Jade).
Asch is another little mystery here. I wonder what you plan on doing with him and whether or not he's going to be more loyal to Van here and what his feelings of Luke are. In canon one of the main reasons Asch switched from Van was because he hated replicas more than he loved, anything, and often saw Luke as a mirror to take his place but try on occasion to accept him. But here Luke is a little (a lot) more reliable in performing his Fabre duties and Asch keeps looking like he wants to plan with him for something (well when his mixed feelings don't come in the way) but he also seems to be pretty much in God-General mode (though this could be from seeing only from the Ves's views). I' wondering if your going to go the canon route and make Asch (if he's even going to show up a lot that is) an allie or go a different/original route and make him a tragic (anti)villian - (anything with Asch is tragic from what I've read. Even at his happiest. I find it sad). /
Yuri wasn't here too much but I'm happy with whatever development/insight he gets when the a Abyss element shows up. I like his zeroing in on Asch and Daath. It makes me wonder how he's going to react to places outside the Empire where the culture is heavily based around the score (I don't know where I would put Yuri in my favorites, but his development is defintely one of the main reasons I like this story since you will be focusing on things Yuri either didn't have to put up with or wasn't focused on too much in canon).
Finally Luke's first talk to someone in the Ves cast abouut his past. I wonder in future chapters if you will have Luke's past about the kidnapping and/or amnesia to thoe others in order to bring up more mystery of Luke for the others (before the replica reveal).
Anyway awesome job Hikaru Irving. I'm glad with the amount of effort you've put in the story and characters.
A crossover with TWO of my FAVORITE Tales Videos Games? OH MY GOD. And Raven, of all people, as a seventh fonist? And the part where Guy came in, hehehehehe, that was fun. And I'm so glad that Judy got Luke out of all that armor. I like him in his normal outfit, you know?
And, HOLY YULIA! It's Jade and Ion! WEE! I totally knew that if Rita and Jade were to ever meet up they would bump heads. Tehee.
This is an amazing story. I like how you're twisting it just enough so that both of the stories can fit together. IT'S FANCY. And I can't wait to read more.
I really need to review more (but I want to do more than just say it was super, which unfortunately I don't have much time for but I'll try).
I think this chapter was extra good in that it was the one that really started speeding into the whole mixture more with Luke's prophecy coming out of the closet and Yuri including Luke's problems right along with Estelle's. It was really nice to see that sort of acknowledgement of Luke, ecspecially how he took it. (It made me wibble a little how even Guy never asked Luke's opinion... I'm kind of, sort of, mad at Guy now). Xp
On the other hand I kind of felt a little sad and amused. I mean Luke has got to be one of the more sad Tales Protagonists due to his, lack of past, and just what people and circumstances put him through. The majority of the Ves cast are civilians (unlike Abyss who were trained Nobles and military folk) so adding Luke's problems along with Estelle's kind of makes me feel sorry for them. Ecspecially when/if Luke starts becoming a member of the "family" so to speak. Good lord if you decide to be cruel enough to actually include the Tower of Rem or even let them gain knowledge of the Big Bang theory. (Eesh, they lucked out with Luke, Luke needs a Rita for his fonnon problems so they can be solved like Estelle's Aer problems were). XD
Anyway I thought this was a great chapter with good forshadowing. I ecspecailly enjoyed the Flynn part, I'm quite eager to see how you work him in this story, (are you going with the possibility of Flynn being a lost relative to Guy? Yuri may not let that down).
So the infamous Jade Curtis finally makes his appearance. It's about time, and I love how you make Yuri and Rita hate him immediately. And poor Luke,he's being pushed around so easily,but that's no surprise.
Oh yeah,are the 6 god generals going to do the same as the game and attack the tatarus? To get hold of Ion? And in this case Luke?
Wildfiredreams 3/16/10 . chapter 8
Ah, I'm also missing the Luke/Tear dynamic from the game as well XD I completely love those two together.
I liked this chapter for Luke's development. XD It adds a nice layer to him in that makes me excited for future chapters in how he will deal with overcoming the score (since unlike canon, he apparently grew up with it more). I also can't wait to see how his relationship with Van is more different/similiar in your story (for some reason I can't get the idea of Van also seeing Luke as a pet instead of just a tool, idk why). Xp
I also liked how this chapter showed more insight/development for the Yuri/Luke dynamic. They're both pretty different in a lot of ways but I like how you show despite their clashes they're both good people with Yuri still having concern while Luke doesn't mind the idea of being his friend. I like seeing how you've develped them so far and I'm curious how you might make them influence the other's development (well more for Yuri's since how Luke will be affected is more obvious).
The only thing that makes me kind of sad is the lack of Tear and Tear/Luke (but that's not really an issue).
Other than that Thanks for Jade, Anise, and Ion this chapter (though I am hoping for that is holy Luke doesn't get too trashed in the upcoming chapters.) DX
! Freaking awesome _ JADE! Jade, Raven, Luke all in the same fanfic _ heh Okay that's enough fangirling. Amazing chapter as always I can't wait to read more!
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