Please continue

This is a really good start! I'm excited to see how this turns out.

I like the direction your story is going. Although, there is quite a few grammer mistakes. It will also be helpful if you seperate the diaologe from the actions. This chapter is in first person so the observations (thoughts) that Inutashio made of the servants and of Izayoi during and in the afterglow of Inu's birth, don't need to be differenciated. Like many fanfic authors italize thoughts so that they don't get confused with the speaking dialoge that the character says to another character.

Example:

"We're going to school today." She smiled brightly at Julie.

"I hate math," Joe said as he slumped down in his desk,"I don't understand any of it."

Don't forget to re-read your work after you finished it. Spellcheck does not pick up all of the errors you could have made i.e. their when it should be there or even they're.

Also, having a second pair of eyes can catch plenty of errors and make helpful suggestions you can use to improve. Even three or four eyes i.e. other people if you haven't figured it out. You can ask someone to beta-read your chapters.

I hope I helped you out a little bit. :)

This sounds good so far! has alot of potential, but will the conversations written how they are now?

So far so good ;)

Awsome idea here! You may want quotes though, if not it is a bit confuing. Other than that awsome idea and work. Update soon.