|Reviews for When I Don't Look|
| BobbiInAction 11/25/11 . chapter 1
I love the story. I always loved the idea of Bernardo and Anita together before they came to America. I wonder, if you could possibly make this in bernardo's point of view? Or another story of them together, something cute like this. I would like it if you used this idea, but it is completely up to you. If you could, think on the idea? I look forward to more from them, and you. :)
| Marian'sAmazing 8/28/10 . chapter 1
Wow! This was amazing! Extremely well-written! One note: you might want to ease up on the italics. Other than that, nothing! Good work!
| justalittle l o o n y 8/1/10 . chapter 1
I loved feisty young Anita and charming young Bernardo. They are so in character. And I love this story! So faving this!
| RhapsodyInProgress 2/9/10 . chapter 1
OMG, this story was so great! Despite my love of all things Jet, NAita's always been one of my female characters, but she doesn't get a lot of attention so it's SO EXCITING to see, not only a story written about her, but a story by an awesome author person like you! YAYNESS.
The little details in this story were so fabulous. You obviously did some reasearch, which is hardly surprising onsiderin git's you, but still awesome to see. It really helps bring a story to life.
Anita and Bernardo were perfectly in character, and absolutely adorable. I like reading about them young and innocent instead of all angsty-like. I loved that Anita likes to dance in the rain, and the detail about her wanting to cut her hair.
Very, very well done m'dear! I loved it muchly!
| KEEPTHEFAITHDBSK 2/8/10 . chapter 1
This was so good/cute/adorable! I want to read more! Would you plez write another chapter? That would be awesome :) good job 5/5 stars for you!
| xXc0okieSsNcrEamXx 2/7/10 . chapter 1
Wow, LC, wow. THIS WAS FREAKING FANTASTIC! Well-written, descriptive, SO in-character. It had it all! It was definitely interesting to see a fic about Bernardo and Anita while they're still in San Juan. And the fact that they hadn't met yet made it even better! I thought the story went perfectly with the quote you chose as well, and it really set the tone nicely. I really liked the foreshadowing you used, too. Bernardo with the gun, Anita dancing in the rain and talking about how she wanted to cut her hair short. It made the story even more believable! And I also really liked how Anita reminded Bernardo of Maria. I thought that was sweet! It was also intriguing that Anita could've possibly been engaged before meeting Bernardo. That was definitely a cool twist!
Bottom line: this story was amazing! I'm thrilled you chose to write it! I'm expecting even more fantastic stuff from you! XD
| viennacantabile 2/6/10 . chapter 1
OH MY GOD. OH MY GOD. THIS WAS FREAKING ADORABLE, I SWEAR. I LOVE IT TO PIECES, OHEMGEE. They were SO in-character and SO cute and OHEMGEE I WANT TO HUG THEM, GAHH. I swear I could picture and hear this playing out in my head, it was so in-character. I love the hints of Bernardo's future character in the gun and the lecture, and Anita is so good as a younger, more innocent version of herself-still fiery, but more idealistic. I also love the detail about her having a younger sister once; it's totally why she's so close to Maria. It's really hard to write Anita, but you did it PERFECTLY here.
Lines I love:
-“My God, it’s hot,” Anita sighed, fanning herself off. “If Hell is hotter than this—which I doubt—I will go to mass every day to stay away from it.”
-“I know that your father is Inigo Palacio,” he said at once, smirking as Anita flushed again. He continued, “And I had heard that he had a lovely daughter, but no one has ever told me her name.”
“Her name is Señorita Palacio,” Anita snapped, quickening her pace. “Now please leave me alone.”
-He grinned, triumphant that he had gotten her to take interest in something. “Abuelita. My mule,” he explained, nodding towards the mule. “She is a grandmother, you know.”
-Bernardo smiled once more, straightening up in his seat. “But you are not really married yet. Besides, it is hot out and the road is long; even married women accept kindness from charming strangers once in awhile.”
-She kept looking at the darkening horizon over the distant mountains, pretending it was far more interesting than the boy beside her. “My name. It’s Anita. You’ve already ruined my reputation, and so you might as well know my name.”
SO GOOD. And for some reason I just love Bernardo going, "HERE HAVE A PAPAYA IT WILL MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER I SWEAR." Heh. XD Anyway, I ADORE THIS, thank you so much for writing it!