|Reviews for Stay With Me|
| randomteenager 1/13/13 . chapter 3
This was a great story. Amazing! So well done. I love the plot, I love the writing. You made this so realistic, I have hope in fanfiction writing. This was so well done! And with my favorite FFVII couple too!
I love how Cloud still has some insecurity, but he'll work through it. I love how Tifa is still hurt from him breaking her trust, and it will take her a while to get it back. I love how you explained how Cloud and Tifa began to get together (through various lunch dates, as you put it.) I love that though there was lust that fueled their physical relationship, they both truly loved each other. I love how the plot took course over several months, not like in a week or two like most romance stories.
The flow of the plot was great. The first chapter, with the engagement to Sephiroth, completely caught me off guard. And you made Sephiroth such a nice, admirable character! The second great plot twist was Tifa finding out she was pregnant. Definitely wasn't expecting that.
Zack and Aerith's roles were so cute. I love how good of a friend Aerith was to Tifa, and Zack to Cloud as well. All their characterizations were excellent and totally in character. I kept picturing the cute young boy Cloud from Crisis Core as I read the story heheh :)
The ending was so cute and so satisfying. Seriously, this is so well done, I would love it if you could write more CloTi in the future! I loooved this story, and I don't say that often. Excellent writing, lovely word choice, everything was so good, so realistic it was great. I kept waiting for Cloud to finally realize he was worthy! And he somewhat did at the end. Every interaction between the two had me wondering whether they were going to mend their relationship or if the situation would only worsen. Thrilling read, excellent, I think I've made my point that I really love this story.
Excellent job, keep up the great work! :)
| preettygabbysz 2/28/12 . chapter 3
Omfg I loved it
| preettygabbysz 2/28/12 . chapter 3
Omfg I loved it
| Strifegirl 7/16/11 . chapter 3
man, I so want to punch Cloud in the face! _ poor Tifa TT Cloud, you're such a dork for leaving her like that . but still, this was beautiful fic :3
I don't like Sephiroth u.u but you made him look like a very nice man and it's nice to know that finally they are together as they were meant to be
| piiyaya 7/9/11 . chapter 3
I soooooo love Sepiroth here. Can I have him? Haha. :)
VERRYYYY NICE STORY! This was the first time I liked Sepiroth, even though he's also good in other stories I have read.:))))
| xPhiieebeex-ayannaaki 9/9/10 . chapter 3
This is so cute, i love it :D
| S.Zix 3/26/10 . chapter 3
For some reason, you used the word "to" a lot. That sounds really silly, but do a find "to" on the first chapter, and you'll see what I mean.
There was also an instance of strange grammar:
"alerted her to his presence as she sat in the dark, her legs tucked under her, and with her facing the door as it opened"
Maybe write "she sat in the dark with her legs tucked under her and faced the door as it opened." Or some such. The "and with her" is a bit awkward. There was a similar circumstance later (I think in chapter 2), but I read this on my phone so I lost it.
In chapter 3, Zack thinks that it's ironic that Cloud is as stubborn as a chocobo because he looks like one. That isn't irony; it's just a coincidence. It would be more ironic if he had a shaved head.
The redundancy issue. Cloud states that he isn't good enough for Tifa, and Tifa recalls this just a bit too often. I think that, after a couple of times (Cloud says it, and Tifa thinks it) we can sort of get why he won't go back to her without you telling us.
Cloud's leg. It just sort of gets treated as an obstacle to Cloud getting out of bed, but what do Cloud and Tifa feel about the leg? Yeah, it isn't the most important thing in the scene, but I imagine it hurts. A lot. It might add more to the catharsis if Cloud ignores his leg to hobble after her even though he acknowledges how much it hurts. Can we get some more vivid description here?
In general, I don't quite buy their reconciliation yet either. Tifa says she needs to learn to trust him more, but then crawls in with him. This is believable, but I need to get there first. It might just be her lack of reaction to his plight and his circumstances as a SOLDIER who could have died if they got together earlier, but I think that you could use Cloud's leg/the position to ramp up some of the sympathy/empathy. Tifa's a caring person. She wants to take care of Cloud. The leg isn't the only way to do this, naturally, but it might be your in.
No one in this story was a bad guy really. I mean, you get the idea that Shinra is manipulating Tifa, but when she runs away, he doesn't do anything about it, so this just sort of invalidates the anxiety earlier. Sephiroth just sort of goes with it all over the place. You want to marry me? Okay. You don't? Okay. It sort of makes sense since he's portrayed as easily manipulated in the games, but I think that if he ever actually knew what was going on in those situations, he would have at least lost it a little bit. Otherwise he just isn't intimidating. Does he know Tifa was cheating on him? How does he react to this? Does he get a little attached to her? Similarly, all of Cloud and Tifa's friends knew about their relationship and were okay with it, offering random advice whenever. Do they ever try to take matters into their own hands? Not really, unless you count the Zack calls Tifa bit at the end, but I think their passivity is a little weird. Further, Cloud and Tifa's only real problems are the weird lies they invent to keep themselves apart. That's just-odd, and I don't quite get it since they constantly tell us that Shinra and Sephiroth are a problem. I understand that this is supposed to be a short story, but I feel like there needs to be an actual conflict here, not just conflict hype.
Now, that said, aside from Sephiroth being passive, I think that you had good seeds for his character. I liked the way you portrayed him. He has an agenda which he thinks is his own, but is actually the agenda of those who control him. This insight in particular is cool enough to make me wish you had brought it more into the forefront of the plot.
Cloud? I buy it. It's a bit dense, but then so is Cloud. My absolute favorite exchange is at the end:
Cloud swallowed hard, staring down at her stomach. "I… I remember what it was like to grow up without a father. I want to be there for this baby. I want to be there for you. I'm a First Class SOLDIER now," he said in a low voice.
"And this makes you worthy of me in your eyes?" Tifa questioned, stepping closer.
It's perfect because Cloud really hasn't learned anything. This makes me a bit sad, but it also tells us that this story is more about these two characters getting to know one another anc compromise. In reality, love isn't enough. They had to compromise to get there, and that doesn't always mean changing. Sometimes it just means figuring out what you have.
I loved the fast-paced nature of the last chapter. Tifa finds out she's pregnant, she rushes to see Cloud, who is already gone, goes to face Sephiroth, and flees to Kalm (it would have been really cool to read about some of the logistics of this and keep the momentum going, but I'll take what I can get since you're often busy : )). I seriously envy your command on pacing in instances like this one. Things work in a nice manner and flow together when we get to the fast, short-scenes.
I like your Tifa too. I didn't think she was being spoiled. She just had some stuff to learn, and her compassionate nature won out in the end. She couldn't expect Cloud to wake up, and that's a reasonable thing to expect, but she loved him anyway, and for once I don't think that that's weak or detestable. You pulled it off.
This was a sweet, short piece, and I wanted more, but I understand that all of your fics can't be epics. Thanks for posting!
| serenbach 3/5/10 . chapter 3
Ah, I'm so sorry it took me so long to read and review this, stupid RL kept getting in the way.
I'm so happy everything turned out okay. I'm glad Tifa didn't marry Sephy and that he was a decent guy in this as well. And their reunion was just so sweet!
Excellent job, as always. :)
| xandria 3/1/10 . chapter 3
Yet another good story from you! Well done! :-)
| Kohryu 2/28/10 . chapter 3
sephiroth acted cool again, which is a nice change of pace ne. Most times he is simply quiet and doesnt say anything as he is paired up with someone like Aerith or no one. oh well.
i get the impression that getting one's leg impaled by something would by far hurt a crap lot ne.
Cloud seems to always get pegged with the "i dont feel like im good enough" syndrome when it comes to liking Tifa eh? i wanna see something different one of these days where Tifa or Yuffie or hell, even Vincent gives him a real slap to the head...although with Vincents gauntlet...would be funny to see...
| Kohryu 2/28/10 . chapter 2
Sephiroth actually got to be cool for once...and not...moronically evil ne. cool.
BABY! THERE IS ALWAYS A BABY! good reason though, babies rock!
| Anon 2/28/10 . chapter 3
I like that mom calling just seems to like the blame the girl for everything. He walked away, even when she said that she was willing to give up everything for him. That must have been hurtful and very painful to her. I don't blame Tifa for getting angry, and doing what she did. She was only human, and people do irrational things. All that aside. Overall, cool story bro.
| Tani2 2/27/10 . chapter 3
I loved this story. It's beautifully written. Nice job.
| vLuna 2/27/10 . chapter 3
They both are stubborn idiots, but I'm glad everything ended well :)
| mom calling 2/26/10 . chapter 3
I don't give them much of a chance, even now. And I don't see that Cloud walked away-what else could he do? Tifa just doesn't send out clear signals and then gets upset that she's not understood. Even tho Zack got her to Cloud's bedside, she stubbornly kept back the information that she wasn't married. Same with baby news. I'm glad you fixed things up...but it really should have been Tifa fixing things. She's still got a lotta growing up to do. But what about you? I don't want to make sour-face-you roped me into the story and kept me interested even though I wanted to crawl into the monitor and do the scolding mom thing to them. So thank you. ciao mc