Not too shabby, though you really need to fix the inconsistencies with the spellings of characters' names and other elements (ie, Ushio's age, the confusion of Dee and Ryo's backstories - and while you're at it, it actually would make much more sense for Ryo's mother to have married the man Ryo considered his father after breaking up with Ushio's father than to have it that she left him to her friends). And fyi, the female Kamaitachi's name is Kanari, Ushio's surname is Aotsuki, and the official transliteration of the names of the FAKE kids are Bikky and Carol.

Also the time-frame is far too rapid; you have Ushio going to America within a few days of his father's death. This just wouldn't have happened. Aside from funeral preparations and whatnot (though I'm not really sure how soon after death the cremation happens and how soon after cremation interment happens - ), there's also the issue of passports and green cards, and, of course, contacting Ryo. The more likely process would have been Ryo coming to pay his respects and set affairs in order, then taking Ushio with him back to America. There are other logical issues with the time-frame too but this is the biggest one.

Also watch out for ethnocentrism and theocentrism in your writing; you're writing about a completely different culture, so it only makes sense to do a bit of research and to avoid American and Judaio-Christian idioms. Christianity is very much a minority religion in Japan (about 1% of the population), so using phrases like "cross to bear" doesn't make sense. "Six feet under" is an American phrase, and again, doesn't make sense in Japan (never mind that in that situation it was a rather bastardly thing to say anyway). And while saying that Ayako was "with the spirits" shows that you got that they aren't Christian, it also shows that beyond that you were guessing instead of looking for the right answer.

Yeah, I know I'm picky, but the stories in "Ushio to Tora" are heavily rooted in Japanese folk lore to begin with; it just completely baffles me when fans of this kind of Anime - especially ones who write fanfiction - don't do their research. But then I'm a perfectionist and take writing very seriously, so...

Well overall I really like it but it does have some problems. In the writer's notes in chapter 1 it says that Ushio's 17 & then in the story his age pretty much constantly changes between 16 & 17. I've only read 1 chapter of book 1 of Fake but Bicky's name changes several times in this. Also in the anime it says that Ushio's mother is dead, the sea monster episodes & in this she's alive & divorced from Ushio's father. Hope these points are helpful.

Wow! This is great! I hope you make a sequel to this one.

*looks around slowly for any chapters hidden from her*

**Blink...blink...**

That's it? What the hell do you mean by 'that's it'? Hell, I even put up an Ushio and Tora fic, cause I like the series so much, and you're ending this good story right in the thick of things? You do know that means you are trading a proven good story for my sucky unproven one, right?

I don't care what you do as long as you either continue on this one, or get that other one you were talking about onto the net. Hiaku!

Oh! O_O; after all this waiting, you end it so bluntly? I COULD KILL YOU! but i wont, since you have another fic, i'll wait... ; anyway, i loved the human-Tora part! it sounded really- exsotic! _

Thanks for finishing. I, of course, would like it to be even longer but then again, I feel that way about all fics I like. Now for the critique overview: I noticed a few discrepancies you might want to work on, they would be easily adressed by a beta reader or even if you read over the finished product yourself. Some of the flashbacks were a bit confusing or could have come in at a better time. I certain places it feels rushed, but, on the whole, its not bad and is an enjoyable read. For a while I had thought you gave up on it' I'm pleased that you did not. Once again, thank you.

OH! so that girl WASENT Mayoku... it was just a big ugly blob thing? Ew... and the story is already ending? ;_; no fiar! after all this time you're gonna end it? O' well... it's your fic... but please make the last chapter juciy, wont you?

I had nearly given up hope for an up date. I eagerly await the next chapter. I would like to see more the everyone's reaction to Tora and Rashin.

Any reasons as to why that shifter haunted the wielders of the Beast Spear? I'd be interested in knowing, but if you don't put it in your story, I won't mind. I'll just pout a lot. Looking forward to new chapters!

Its been, what, months since you've updated this fic? What are you waiting for? Asako to resurrect? Get on with the story!

By the way, I really like your fic and am waiting for the next chappy.

Okay, so it's late, and I have not the brains to dance around the basic meaning every review has... so... You MUST WRITE MORE! BECAUSE THIS IS A GOOD STORY!

-SVR (falls asleep on keyboard...)

ALRIGHT! so Tora is back and was abotu to KILL ushio? girl what were you thinking? T_Tx glad things went fine.. i wonder if the kids are gonna be alright after this... cool intro for Tora though i love it! it was- unpridictable!

Yay! This chapter is everything I could hope (except longer). I noticed you used a line in this chaper that you use in the last chapter ("that went well"). I thought it was a nice touch, it brought the two conversations together. Please keep posting!

A chapter long time coming, but worth it. I was stuck to this chapter like glue. Very good reading. Keep up the good work.

LOL! *falls off the chair* I loved the part when Ushio jumped off the roof! poor Ryo! n_n;;

as for the other two, how dare they think that Ushio killed his oun father? T_TX what's thier problem anyway? can poor little Ushio have a little peace in his life?

(and where's Tora from all of this?) you're getting on my nervse here!