you are wery taladted.

It was clear that the writer of this fanfic was somewhat inexperienced with writing, but the story overall was a success. Characterization and diction were well-done, suspense was adequate, and even the liscenses you took, though a bit clumsy, were interesting.

Some hints that might come in useful:

-Do not write out spells unless necessary, and if you do, be sure to use consistency. The multi-lined spell was verbose and distracting.

-Your theologies kind of ran into each other; granted, I do the same thing in Chapter 8 of Path of the Hero, but I'll need to justify that to my readers in my epilogue, and I was subtle about it. The combining of Judeo-Christian elements with the polytheistic Zelda religion isn't undoable, and you didn't do a bad job, but you could have done better.

-Your description of the Link-Majora battle was almost too descrptive; merely touching up on the ferocity of the battle and not truly plunging the reader into it until the Fierce Deity scene would have been more effective.

-Your sometimes list actions (i.e. "and then... and then..."). Try to avoid this kind of writing; spice it up with more variety in sentence structure and pacing.

That's all I can think of right now. Overall, well-done. I enjoyed it.

Wow! I'm really impressed. You should make this a book. This is really awesome! I can't wait to read the other ones!

I LOVE IT!

You know, I just love reading the Imp of Fate Trilogy because it's perfect! You should Gon on and finish that sequel you were talking about!

MROW!

WHHHEEEEEWWWWWW!

One rarely sees good Majora's Mask fics nowadays. Good job.

A pleasant and long read, grammatically accurate, free of glaring/bad/noticeable spelling errors, in short, a very, very, very good fic.

Please, do write more.

Ja

heh... that was really good. although every word was predictable (cmon... link wouldn't kill mido) and i think the epilogue was just utterly pointless... it was nice. me like. much. it's tought to find good stories on fanfic these days... but i think it has been found. i like how you twisted the plots of the stories, instead of making everything fit excaclty how it is in the game. that's boring. very very good.

This is such a great, wonderful, insightful story! I love the concept of Mesmoria and the fairy city and everything. Wonderful! Continue writing!

Alrigight! That was really something!