| Reviews for Ivy and Roses |
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MackenzieW 11/30/02 . chapter 6This is such a good story-keep it up! You are a very talented writer, capable of keeping the audience entranced. I love it, I love it, I love it! *Mac* |
Ivory 10/25/02 . chapter 5 I do wish you didn't reprint every single chapter at the beggining of this one. It really isn't nessisary and makes reading a pain in the arse and quite unpleasant. But I will concede it is well written. I'm rather enjoying your plot anyway. Please continue soon. But don't repost the other chapters when you do continue please. (Try saving each chapter as a separate document. That way it CAN'T Upload everything.) |
Daemon Neko 10/9/02 . chapter 4PLEASE WRITE MORE! I am dying to find out what happens next! |
Lizzy 8/4/02 . chapter 4 Please keep going i love different forms of the basic fairy tales. I really like this one! |
MandELLA 5/28/02 . chapter 4 i can't remeber who you are anymore, only that you reviewed one of my stories...are u fufie? or something like that? Anyways...i LOVE this story! please continue it. i really don't know what else to say... PLEASE UPDATE IT! Thank you. |
loomber 5/27/02 . chapter 4Woohoo! A BALL! |
loomber 5/27/02 . chapter 3stoopid princeling... ...kisses anabelle secretly... ::mutterz incoherently:: o well... he's still better than meh dumbfounded one _... u noe... ze prince-without-a-name guy or does he have one? (I FORGOTZ HOW MEH STORIE WENT!) -_-' |
loomber 5/27/02 . chapter 2oOoOoOoOoOo... A pRiNcElInG! ::grinz mischeviously:: |
Threshie 4/17/02 . chapter 3ROFL, he hates his name, but he signed it on the letter! Cute fic thus far, and well-described and presented, if a tad confusing with all the POV-shifting. That's just the style this is written in, though. The storyline is interesting thus far, though I don't see the real curse that the castle and people had to endure short of having to stay there. ;; Maybe that's the whole thing. Interesting characters, and an intriguing story-please continue this! -Threshie |
Phasera 4/10/02 . chapter 3It's an interesting story. At first I wasn't sure why you would be telling it from the point of view of the maid, but that's cleared up now. Poor Summer. Oh, are you aware that you randomly switch from first person to third person viewpoints? It's not disrupting, but it's a little odd. Some suggestions: I saw you inserted a paragraph from the point of view of the princess, and it felt strange reading it, because you'd never really developed her as a character after the curse happened. I think you need to have her telling her feelings about her curse before you have her tell about her feelings for the Prince. And as for the Prince, i'd like to see his POV as well. He's rather obtuse, I can't tell what his MO is... Just one last suggestion, is to spend a little time developing details or descriptions. i know that's the tedious part, but I've found it can really improve the depth and mood of a scene. :) That's all. Overall, great job. I'll be looking for updates of this. |
Indigo Ziona 4/2/02 . chapter 3Aw! I love the way Summer and Cynric interact... I really want to find out what happens :) keep writing. |
Daemon Neko 4/1/02 . chapter 3WOOT I love it so far! Continue the story! _ |
fufie 4/1/02 . chapter 1oh fooey, no reviews for chapter 3 yet. O( maybe i should have waited to post it. it IS a kind of strange chapter, but since that chapter's necessary in order for the plot i have planned to work, i have to keep it. i guess i'll review my story now... i'm really bored and don't have anything better to do than eat more Jet's pizza, but i'm trying to LOSE weight, not gain it. so, let's see here. i think Annabelle needs to be more defined, because others (and me, for that matter) can hardly tell what her personality is like. i bet that sounds weird-me not knowing what Annabelle's personality is like. Cynric is acting pretty odd. well, not really, but that letter he wrote was pretty screwy. i think i better edit that. and Summer's just...different. i don't know what happened. okay well, i'm sounding boring. this isn't right. i'm reminding myself of my english teacher. (ahh) okay, that's it for the review i guess. i think im tired. that means i need some sugar and pop. and i need to torture my little sister now. . unless, of course, she goes AWAY. (hint hint, lauren) bye! ) -fufie |
chava 3/24/02 . chapter 2When you post a second chapter, it needs to be a completely separate document from the first. Otherwise, the site thinks you want to post the entire document, first and second chapters, again. Posting a different document for each chapter must get very annoying, I'm sure-but maybe the other fanfic authors know ways to get around it. I've only posted a couple of poems, so all I can suggest is to copy the second chapter onto a new doc and post that as chapter two, unless an actual author can tell you a shortcut around that...but I don't know, so ask around. As for the fic, you have wonderful grammar and an EXCELLENT grasp of word choice (and believe me, if I stoop low enough to use all capital letters for something, it must be good). I read this because I saw you mention it in your review for Anniya ("Thank you for reviewing my pathetic fic..."). I wasn't expecting much, since you called it pathetic, and was rather shocked when I breezed through without stumbling over grammar mistakes or awkward word choices; not to mention the great twist you've got here-probably the most original Beauty and the Beast I've ever read. You haven't developed Annabelle's character much, and it appears that Summer is your main character. If you plan on creating a romance between the handsome stranger and the princess, you need to tell things from the princess's point of view. That said, remember to be careful with changing POVs all the time, because it might detract from the story. Don't start a chapter with one POV and switch to someone else mid-chapter; stick to one person per chap. Really, you should try to avoid changing POVs altogether. I'd rather the stranger/prince guy get with Summer, since he's a prince, she's a servant, and the basis for a romantic relationship has already been established. One possibility is to create a relationship between Annabelle and a poor peasant, who may or may not be rather plain-looking. She could even fall in love with a beast, and break her spell by breaking his. The only problem with all that is the prophecy about the curse ending when a *stranger* came to the castle, which suggests that said stranger must fall in love with Annabelle and break the cursre. You could get around that by making Summer somewhat responsible for breaking the curse, or another related plot hole cover-up that I can't think of off the top of my head. Anyway, ponder it awhile. Do not just make Annabelle and the stranger fall in love and keep Summer, your main character, a mere on-looker. Your main character needs a love-interest too, but you're the author, so decide this for yourself: who falls in love with who? I'm looking forward to more of this story! Please get ch. 3 out as soon as possible! chava |
fufs the author 3/24/02 . chapter 2 GRRRRRRRRRRRRR! I finally get the site to upload more of the story-and it uploads the whole freakin thing again. what did i do wrong? please tell me! |