wow you did a great job updating it this is supposed to be a review for your second chappie but i already review it... -w-" anyways good job and keep it up w

I realy like your idea of adding a girl to the story i rly wanted a girl to like some one here except for Maki's "girlfriends" ( ya no the 1 from Jun's school :/ ) anyways plz continue it i rly wannted to read teh next chapter _

this chap so far is awesome! i just read the whole volumes of cafe kichijouji that my cuz gave meh and its awesome! plzz continue it! :D

1. How would she speak Japanese?

2. I'm guessing YOU are the Louise character, so it's a self insert thing?

Try to keep continuity safe, to keep grammar ordered, and the characters in character. And don't make a Mary Sue out of "Louise"... that's so easy to do with OC's so be warned!

There's not really meant to be script form stories but I won't tell if you won't.

Anyways, this is a little OOC and a bit too crazy. I mean, there's a fine line between funny and lame and you sorta failed. But that's ok! Improvements can be made! Crusade on! Though I'd get a beta just in case.