wow that was one of the best stories i have ever read, i loved it

I seriously have to tell you how amazing this story is. I only have two critiques, and the rest is all just amazed and how well you've written your tale. My heart broke for Edward and his family, and for Bella. They were all so realistic, their problems were realistic, and yet this small portion of their lives was also strangely magical. The pacing of Edward and Bella's relationship was specifically great. There were no unnecessary ultimatums or grand realizations. It was organic and wonderful.

In regards to the two things I mentioned, the first is wordiness. It was difficult sometimes to weed through sentences filled with unnecessary words. For instance, you had your characters doing a lot of things "silently," but if you don't mention them talking, then we already know that they are silently fulfilling their task. I really admired how you switched up your sentence structure, so it didn't read "see spot run," but they were bogged down. Less is more and all that. Never say in forty words what you can say in ten, unless theirs a very specific reason for doing so.

The second thing is more preference, since I've actually heard people say the opposite of me. I tend not to get as emotional as I should when theirs a warning at the beginning of a chapter. If you say I'll need a tissue or I'll laugh my butt off, I simply won't because I'll be expecting it. So yeah, haha. Take what you will of this one. I've heard it said both ways. I'm a lover of spoilers in a factual sense, but not emotionally.

One specific part of your story that I must point out was the chapter where Edward talked to his men for the first time over the radio. I even read it to my mother (who hates twific) and we both teared up. It was such a beautiful scene and I think depicts the way I feel about the story in its entirety. Thanks so much for writing it!

This first-second chapter is so good. I'm a bit nervous reading it, poor edward...

Yeah. I went ahead and read it. :-)

I truly loved this story. So much, that I have not slept a full night this week. I'm behind on my masters course assignment...the final paper. Geez. But I wouldn't trade it for anything. I loved the story so much. I'm so happy. Now I'm off to take a much needed nap, get some work done on this paper, shower and eat and then read the next chapter. It will be my prize. Oh, who am I kidding. I'm most likely clicking next and reading now. Lol. You are so talented! It was an honor to read this story. Thank you so much for sharing!

Awwwww!

It's almost over. *sniffles*

Only you could portray this with such perfection.

Yay, yay , yay!

I see sparks fly!

I love this story for so many reasons. Right at this moment I love how beleavable it is.

As I said before. Intense.

I see how this story has to be written from third person though i usually don't like it, it works here.

Lovely.

I want her to be there when he wakes up.