Oh awesome! I love how you circled back in the ending to that same training exercise. It represents a true circle, now complete, whole, the troubles overcome and now both Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon can start anew.
Obis meditation sounded awesome, his little imaginary place sounded gorgeous, though Master Daec-mar kind of ruined the scene, but it was really nice to read and I liked how Obi felt Quis hand but because he was in his own imaginary scene in his mind he didnt see him. Its difficult to explain, but it sounded quite intriguing, that he could tell Quis presence by touch and then hearing him, even when he was so far into his mind, into his meditation. It just struck me as important and extraordinary.
Obis journal entry was a nice way of explaining his improvements without having to go through that long period, if you can call two months long. Its a nice way of wrapping things up and theres been shown enough of Quis helping and kind side to imagine how that period had passed by.
And then the training excercise was just plain awesome, the way Obi was working on it for 2 hours straight with not one hit and nowhere near exhausted only some strain in his muscles but also his joy at the realization of how strongly he was connected to the force that he was not just dodgind-blocking but dancing around, it was super cool.
All in all, this story is WICKEDLY COOL! Ive enjoyed it from beginning to end, heck, I enjoyed the entire series as you probably noticed from the many reviews.
this whole series ,but especially this one, has been a rollercoaster of emotions, both the emotions I shared with the characters as my own emotions at every plot twist and turn of events. It had me on edge, had me relieved, had me cheerful all at the same time. I fele like I went on this journey together with Obi and Qui, I felt really pulled into their world, into their troubles and joys and it was an amazing journey.
You are a brilliant writer, nothing anyone says will sway that thought and I am super thankful for this wonderful series you wrote and I hope you wont stop writing. Im sure you can come up with some more wonderful stories, either with similar plots or completely different plots, I jsut hope it will be about Obi and Qui, especially Obi for he is the most awesome character ever XD
Yay they did it! I'm so relieved. Poor Obi, he never catches a break. I loved the duel between Qui and his master. It was excellent! the bombs were a shocking twist and FORCE...Wui certainly took it a bit too close. I've never read or watched a movie where a bomb reached zero and did not explode because it was in that split second of switching form one to zero dismatled. Usually they cut it a few seconds, but you went all the way. I was chewing my nails and when I read the bomb switched to zero and then didn't explode, I sat wide eyed for a few seconds, frozen and unable to read on and then I let out a huge sigh of relief.
Of course, then my anxiety returned as Obi-Wan got to work on his bomb. His frantic thoughts as he tried to think of the password but realized he knew near to nothing of the man were quite worrying. I was beginning to fear that Qui-Gon would be needed because he would know more of the man ,but I'm very happy to find Obi did know the most important thing of the man, the date when his revenge began. It was definitely nerve wrecking, but excellent piece of writing.
this whole, HUGE, chapter had me at the edge of my seat, bend forwards to my screen and I'm pretty sure nothing could have distracted me from reading XD
This was an amazing chapter, a nice climax to the whole story and the way Daec-mar died was rather unexpected but true to his character. He would not have letten Qui get off easy, but in a way the idiot saved Qui from having to do something painful, he wasnt aware that dying would not hurt Qui as he hoped it would, Qui just didnt, couldnt do the deed himself.
I absolutely loved this chapter, you did an amazing job. the plot was well thought through and both simple as complex. You can be extremely proud of this accomplishment.
thank youf or this wonderful chapter. Im now off to read the final chapter!
Oh no! this can't be happening! Why did i insist on reading this chapter too before I would go to bed? Now I'll have to wait till morning to read how this continues!
You really are amazing with cliff hangers XD
I really liked this chapter a lot. It was also much longer than the others. I liked Obi's reasons for not telling Qui-Gon who hurt him at first and I liked Qui-Gon not falling into the same feeling of betrayal he had with Xanatos because now he has Obi-Wan. Both their reasons/thoughts were incredible, both complex as simple and it was all well thought through and just shows how amazing a writer you are.
It's also surprising to find out WHY Qui's master did all this, and I have to say, his entire revenge plan is quite ingenius, I have to give that credit, well to you actually as the writer whoe invented this guy. You have a strange mind, able to write about the loving characters Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon and with that same mind of yours you think up this brutal, cruel sort of mastermind.
When I found out about the recording, my breathing stopped for a few seconds, my eyes widened at my screen and I gasped out loud, no lie. If someone had bene here with me - which they ar enot sinc eit's now almost half past 2 in the night - they would have thought I had read something horrifying instead of a sneaky move by a character in a fanfiction.
I was actually hoping in my mind that I hand't read that, cause as soon as I read the word "recording" I knew Obi-Wan was already taken away. But before the recording was revealed, the words the man spoke of hoping Qui had enjoyed his "last" moments with Obi, I feared he may have poisoned Obi or something, but no, it was far worse. Once again, the man slipped by everyone and got to Obi-Wan.
Force only knows what he'll do to him now. I'm sure my dreams will be filled with this story, thinking up scenario's of what could happen in the next chapter and not being able to find out NOW is driving me nuts! but it's really getting late and I swore to myself I would only read one more chapter this evening, or well night, it's far past evening XD
So, with much releuctance I will go to sleep now. My reviews will continue tomorrow, cause I'm so not doing anything else until I've finished this story. I faintly remember this series was going to be 7 stories long, but I can't remember if that was correct, I might be mistaken. but if it is true, I'm even more nervous for the last two chapters in this story. I sincerely hope you aren't ending this story on a mayor cliff hanger and I will be forced to wait for the next story.
Anyway, I'm loving this story and I'm beginning to babble and get off topic. You write amazingly, I never came a cross a part in the story that didn't read easy or was boring and all I can say after this whole mouthful is that this story and your entire series - even though you mentioned it could be a sort of stand alone story, I'm glad I read all the others in order as it gave me a sort of insight into your version of Obi and Qui -but both the series and this story are superb, splendidly and definitely worth a thousand reviews, at least!
A good night, I'll be back tomorrow, Mark My Words XD Sorry, must be the sleep deprivation that makes me a little funny XD
Dun dun dun... Sorry I couldn't resist. Well at least Qui knows something now, he's progressing. Poor Obi, his fear is palable and it's so sad to read about his reactions as Qui-Gon tries to sooth him only getting the wrong results.
I was just as grateful as Qui when Obi finally spoke, although what he was saying wasn't anything close to comforting. I missed Obi-Wan in the previous chapters and it's great to have him back again, and the angst in this story seems to be very much present still.
I can hardly wait for some kind of explosion to happen, not a literal one. Either Qui finding out who his attacker is or maybe even meeting the man and then finding out the identity.
I'm in love with this story and despite the fact that it's 20 minutes to 2 am, I cannot stop reading. You've done an amazing job!
Ah frustration, frustration, frustration! The answer is right there, yet qQui can't see it nor grasp it and Obi isn't telling and this is so painful! I wish Obi to be save and qui to not have to hurt and this whole story has me captured and won't let me go!
I'm loving it, even though it's frustrating and suspenseful enough to drive me insane. It's only worse because I can understand both sides, Obi's reluctance to tell because it will hurt Qui to know the identity and Qui needing to know cause he wants to protect Obi and can't if he doesn't know the enemy and he's hurting because Obi is injured.
Talk about turmoil! You sure know how to torment these poor characters and I can't help but love the story all the mroe for it. You capture everything splendidly, your characters come to life as I read them, I sometimes forget I'm reading a story so caught up I get in it.
It's fantastic beyond words and I'm dying to read more and luckily I can XD Amazing job!
Oh thank the force that is over. The vision was horrifying though I could easily read it since Angst is like my favorite type of story. I know, I'm crazy, no need ot tell me XD
Poor Qui though, having to see all that. Obi showed real courage not giving in to the man ,but how I wish he'd called for help. This is so horrible yet at the same time addictive to read.
The story is progressing nicely and you mentioned this was one of the weakest part of the story and I have to disagree. It was, to my opinion, not weak at all and in fact quite a strong part of the story. Not only did Qui find out a little more, touhhg he would argue with me that is was closer to nothing, he found out mroe of Obi's torture tohugh that isn't exactly a happy thing at least he knows something more of the story and he found out how strong his padawan truly is and how brave.
Even the frustrating conversation with Yoda was well done.
So far I haven't come across one weak moment in this story or the entire series for that matter. Sure I miss Obi's presence in the story, but I know he'll soon return and I had lots to occupy my mind with while he was "away".
As always, the story is easy to read, clear and written light, meaning no super big chunks of text, but nicely sized parts of text. Hope that makes sense, I can't find the right words here, must be my sleep deprivation.
Still, no matter how tired I am, as long as I can sit up enough to still see my screen and as long as I can keep my eyes open and my brain works enough to understand what I'm reading, I'm gonna keep reading this. That's how addictive your story is XD
Thanks again for the wonderful read, I'm off to the next chapter again XD
Oh cruel much! Raise poor Qui-Gon's hopes and crush them an instant later.
I love Tahl's involvement so far, she really is a good comforting presence to Qui-Gon and a great help.
I'm now itching for some news on Obi and very maybe his waking up, I sooo miss him.
The suspense is killing me, still, though now rising rapidly. I want Qui to save Obi ,to protect him, but everything is working against him. And I have a feleing that won't change quickly.
The story is amazing, very suspenseful, very exciting, very angsty (I love Angst XD) and very addictive. I cannot stop reading even thought I should be going to sleep right about now. It's already past midnight now, but I have to read more and so I shall continue. Sleeping can be done later XD
thanks for this wonderful story, I'm off to the next chapter!
Oh dear, you really have me worried nowand that horrible, well vision or whatever it was, was beyond cruel. Poor Obi, this is heart breaking, no heart wrenching, you get my point.
I think I'm slowly understanding the secret now, though I can't be sure, yet.
I hope Obi wakes up soon, I miss him already XD not that Qui-Gon isn't fun to read about, I jsut love Obi-Wan.
This story is really exciting and now slightly horrifying and immensely suspenseful cause Obi is in critical state, Qui has no idea who attacked Obi and why, the council and Obi are sharing a secret and I'm super glad I can kepe reading cause otherwise I would be screaming in frustration cause the suspense is killing me!
NO! What an ending! Luckily this story is finished otherwise I would go nuts the way you left that chapter hanging there.
I love how Tahl once more set Qui straight and then Qui's panic when he realized Obi was missing and something was very wrong. What happened! I will find out.
Oh and the part with Yoda and MAce was really funny XD
Ooooohhh! Talk about bad news! This is sounding quite dangerous. Poor Obi! He's sure to feel nervous and stuff now, wonder if he can block those motions well enough form Qui-Gon.
It's a great start to the story and I'm so happy I finally made it as far as this story and the first chapter is awesome, just as I was hoping when I found the story and was working my way up to this sixth story.
first chapter and no complains or disappointments from me. I'm already in the love with it!
i had been trying to work out his attacker and the fact that you gave quite a number of clues int he first chapter alone...unfortunately i couldnt quite remember where they pertained to and began to think that maybe i hadnt read your stories as closely as i thought. And then the fact that he closed off the bond and it was said that only a master or padawan could close the bond off. the fact that jinn recognised the voice and that apparently the council and yoda was closely related to whatever happened made me think that it had to have occured with them nearby i.e. on coruscant. I was pondering and puzzling and wracking my memories of the previous fics and finally cam to the conclusion that his attacker had to be Jinn's former master. Its the only person and conversation that really stood out when Obiwan was trying to save his father and master at once, plus its the only thing that fits (except that Yoda stated he was dead...but i suppose if he's been banished from the Order i was he might as well be). That figured I tried to figure out why he'd be such a problem to Obiwan well I got the inkling that 'maybe' Obi had him as a master for a time...course then i reached line 5 up from the bottom of chp3 (i'd stopped after Jinn recognised the voice to think about all this lol) and realised that i'd gotten it...spot on! excellent...love puzzling out a good mystery...not that this answers everything of course ;P
You know...its funny but i barely remembered the name of Jinn's master you mentioned so when Ram-Cead came up I was a little confused until the mention of 'changing names' was brought up. I'm ashmaed to admit that the revelation in Ram-Cead didn't occur to me until nearly the end of chp5, wherein i vaguely recalled that the name Yoda mentioned was also double barrelled and began with a D and had an M in there somewhere too. Next thing i know i'm staring at the name and thinking 'hang on...it does look similar' It came to me (though i went back to the RtB2 and checked anyway)..its backwards! Anyway...i did really enjoy this one. the revelation, angst, stress, characters and of course the twists and turns and mystery of it all weaved beautifully together...So glad i remembered your fics so I could read this one! Sorry about the long explanation of working it out but I felt like sharing it lol
Oh and by the way, have i ever mentioned how WELL you do these guys with angst? No? well you do...this RtB series is one of my favs for Obi/Qui angst as it hits all the right buttons and the makeup is never too mushy or cheesy. Thanks _
Wow. Just... wow. This fic is amazing. You're style is different and refressing, the Obi-Qui relationship is beautifuly played, and your stories are phenomonal. There were a number of twists I did not see coming (the whole thing with Qui's old master) and your descriptions, or lack there of made me feel phisicaly ill... I have a hard stomach too. Unlike many authors on the site you got the feel of self doubt down to a point. The character development is realistic, and for being in first person I didn't fall asleep. (If your writing wasn't so enticing, I never would have gotten past the first few paragraphs. I hate first person O_o) I've spent two nights up far later than I ought to just reading your work. Out of the 5 thousand plus fanfictions I have read, your's quickly climbed to the eleite group of the best H/C on here.
Ok, it's a really, really, really long time this story had been published, and it's may be weird I let a review just now, but I don't care!
I just pass my day to read all of the 'RtB series', and I really think your work deserve a comment, even after all this years.
I really enjoy your story, I was... completely in, like I was drawn in characters' personality and feeling - worry, fears, pain, concern, warmth... - and I rarely felt that way before another story. You really have a great writing style, in my point of view of course.
So, thank you for writting this, I really enjoy the reading, it was a really good time for me.
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