Reviews for How many Hufflepuffs ...

Reviews For: How many Hufflepuffs ... - Reviews: Page 1 of 16

Alia Lynn Riddle 2006-10-29 ch 12,	abuseHello. I love the jokes so here's some I made up. They're horrid. By the way, I agree, Slytherins are the best. How many Slytherins does it take to light a wand? 3. Draco to light the wand (cuz he rocks) and Crabbe and Goyle cuz they always follow Draco around. How many FanFiction authors does it take to light a wand? There wouldn't be any of us left, we'd all die of shock from finding out we were magic. How many hot Hogwarts guys does it take to light a wand? Umm...3. Cedric, Ron, and Draco. How many Harry Potter haters does it take to light a wand? All the HP haters to make mean jokes, and me in disguise so I can Avada Kedavara them.
Asmodeus1389 2005-07-29 ch 1,	abuseOkay, I might be going overboard now...but I promise I'm finished!! How many Marauders does it take to light a wand? ~Four - one to betray the wand, one to have his wand blown up, one to be falsely accused of lighting the wand, and one to turn the wand into a wolf. How many Viktor Krums does it take to light a wand? ~Too busy doing doing Wronky Faints...err, Wronski Feints to even try. How many Aidan Lynchs does it take to light a wand? ~Too busy falling for the above said Wronski Feints. How many Unicorns does it take to light a wand? ~Dunno, but it might help if someone stopped killing 'em. How many centaurs does it take to light a wand? ~You try getting a straight answer out of them!! How many Flamers does it take to light a wand? ~They don't need to try, they're already on fire!! (Yeah, lame, I know, but as no one else had done that one yet...) How many Bertha Jorkinses does it take to light a wand? ~Only one, but first she has to gossip about who else she saw lighting the wand first. How many Percys does it take to light a wand? ~He has to finish his report on Cauldron bottoms first. How many fanfiction Ginnys does it take to light a wand? ~Just one, but first she has to stop snogging Malfoy.
Asmodeus1389 2005-07-27 ch 12,	abuseHow many Gryffindor's does it take to light a wand? ~Zero, they're all to busy saving the day (again) to try. How many Order of the Phoenix members does it take to light a wand? ~one to hex everything in sight, one to change what she looks like and knock something over simultaneously, one to be locked inside the house, one to go crazy about a sparkplug, one to turn into a wolf, one to yell at Fred and George, one to sneer at Harry, one to be a secret-keeper, one to mislead the search for a mass-murderer, one to steal a bunch of frogs, cauldrons, or anything else not bolted to the floor, and one to insist that she can actually see dementors. (Ten points to your house if you kept up if all of that, and an additionally 15 if you can correctly identify all of those members.) How many Professor Quirrells would it have taken to light a wand? ~One, p-p-providing he could st-stop st-st-stuttering long enough to s-say lu-lu-lumos. ~one, if Snape stops threatening him long enough to let him do it. ~He doesn't have time to light a wand, he has to steal the Philosopher's Stone. ~Four, one to let in a troll; one to faint; one sneak up to the third floor; and one to arrange for Snape, and not himself, to be bitten. How many Professor Trlawneys does it take to light a wand? Only one, but she promptly puts it out because she is thoroughly convinced that she sees the Grim in its light. How many Ravenclaws does it take to light up a wand? ~Ravenclaw? That house actually exists in the books?!?!?! How many Diggory's does it take to light up a wand? ~Only one but he's far too noble to actually take the credit for it. How many Hufflepuffs does it take to light a wand? ~One, but by the time he finally gets it lit, his five seconds of fame are stolen by none other than a Gryffindor. Tough Luck, guys.
Asmodeus1389 2005-07-27 ch 11,	abuseHow many Gryffindors does it take to light a wand? ~One, but then, to make it worthwhile, he has to go to the Forbidden Forest, after curfew.
Asmodeus1389 2005-07-27 ch 10,	abuseHow many Peeves does it take to light a wand? ~only one, but he'll run away at the very mention of the Bloody Baron. How many Mad-Eye Moodys(ies?) does it take to light a wand? ~Oh, only one, but be careful not to make any sudden moves in his presence. How many Snapes does it take to light a wand? ~It depends upon whose side he's on this week...
Asmodeus1389 2005-07-27 ch 8,	abuseOkay, time for me to hop onto the band wagon. How many Blast-Ended Skrewts does it take to light up a wand? ~Why would they need the light, if they have blasts on the ends of their tails? How many hippogriffs does it take light up a wand? ~Only one, but only after it's been provoked by Malfoy. How many Death Eaters does it take to light up a wand? ~Only one, but he was definitely under the Imperious Curse How many Ludo Bagman's (Bagmen?) does it take to light up a wand? ~ Five, one to bet on whether or not he can do it, one to lose the bet, one to make another bet to pay off the first bet, one to lose the second bet, and one to run from the goblins. How many Crouch's does it take to light up a wand? ~Three, One to break his son out of prison, one to impersonate an auror, and one to light it while under the Imperious Curse. How many framed mass-murderers does it take to light up a wand? ~ Well, I'm not sure myself, but once he breaks out of prison, I'll let you know. How many James Potters does it take to light up a wand? ~Well, only one, but he has to be sure to do it when Lily is watching
Asmodeus1389 2004-02-19 ch 6,	abusei know your not the one who made up the jokes in this chapter, but ollivanders is in Diagon alley, not hogsmeade
Asmodeus1389 2004-02-19 ch 3,	abusethese are great. i'm not that funny, but when i think some up i'll tell you!
dracolover99 2004-01-31 ch 2,	abusethis is kinda a sucky fan fic uhoh! i'm gonna up your rating to pg-13 this is kinda **! just my opinion
MyGodIsMephistopheles 2004-01-24 ch 1,	abuseThose were really bad...but whatever just my opinion.
medelia 2003-11-20 ch 12,	abuseare you still doing this? If so, here's my contribution... How many Umbridge's does it take to light a wand? Four. One to write to Fudge and ask for a Decree so she can be the only one at Hogwarts to do it, One to say "hem hem", one to flaunt the decree in front off all the other Proffessors and one to actually light the darn thing. How many Tonks' does it take to light up a wand? -Three. One to drop it, one to trip over while trying to get it,and one to pick it up and manage to do the spell.
Nihtferhowyn 2003-10-12 ch 11,	abuseI forgot one, How many wand-lighting jokes does it take to light a wand on fire? ~Well, 12 chaps, 227 reviews and counting, one author, MANY jokes, over 100 reviewers and I STILL haven't been able to light my wand!
Nihtferhowyn 2003-10-12 ch 12,	abuseHey let's see... I know these are bad but... How many Harrys does it take to light a wand? ~One, but first he has to fall in love w/ Ron, then realize he has feelings for Snape and then make a heart wrenching desicion about who he should be with. ~One, but first he has to realize he's an all powerful wizard who can do anything How many Snapes does it take to light a wand? ~One, but he'd rather blame Harry for it and take 5 points off of Gryffindoor ~One, but he says Malfoy did it and awards Slytherin 50 points ~None, he frightens the Hufflepuffs into doing it for him How many Mary-Sue haters does it take to light a wand? ~Why light a wand when you can light a Mary Sue on fire? ~None, they light the Mary Sue instead How many Flamers does it take to light a wand on fire? ~None, they can't, which makes you wonder; why are they called "Flamers" if they can't light something on fire? ~None, they perfer screaming at the author How many Agrogs does it take to light a wand on fire? ~Ron: "you mean there's more than one off them?" Faints How many students does it take to light a wand on fire? ~None, they're not allowed by degree 273 of the minestry of magic. Signed, Cornelious Fudge ~IF they COULD light a wand on fire, then they WOULDN'T be at Hogwarts LEARNING to light one, WOULD they? How many Death Eaters does it take to light a wand on fire? ~I didn't stick around to find out! ~I'd perfer not to get close enough to figure it out How many Voldemorts does it take to light a wand on fire? ~I'm not crazy enough to get close enough to find out! ~I don't have a death wish, thank you very much. ~There's more than one! OH GOD! CLONE HARRY! WE NEED MORE HARRY'S, /REAPEAT/, WE NEED MORE HARRY'S! ~They've multiplied? RUN AWAY!
dot dot dot 2003-09-19 ch 12, anon.	abuse-How many mudbloods does it take to light a wand? ~None. We actuall do it but they get the credit.~
Kopi Maverickgean 2003-08-13 ch 7,	abuseHow many tri-wizard champs dose it take to light a wand? 4- one to light it, one to spy and steal the spell, on to cry when she cant do it and one to learn how to count.

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