awww, that's so sweet, I just love Bellandy and Kecheii!

awww, that's so sweet, I just love Bellandy and Kecheii!

awww, that's so sweet, I just love Bellandy and Kecheii!

Great story Dana, oh yeah this is my new login name, bt Sapphire still works.

well actually to the Sakura reviewer Oh and Ah are actually both correct, originally it was Ah! Megumi-sama which translated to something to Ah! My Goddess when it was made into the english version the creator (keep forgetting his name) translated it to Oh! My Goddess to paraodize the commonly said "Oh My GOD!" so yeah it's both oh and ah, as for Keiichi's name being spelt wrong...well it is...oh well 1/2 isn't so bad, right?

Spacing. PLEASE use it. It would improve ones ability to read your story a great deal.

Also a proofreader wouldn't hurt.

Example So Bellandy concrete on Her power and began to Make her wish.

I think that "Belldandy concentrated on her power and began to make her wish" makes a tad more sense, unless of course she was planning on pouring a slab of cement.

A nice concept, storywise but rather rough in the presentation. Keep trying, you'll get there.

It's Ah! My Goddess, not Oh My Goddess!

It is Keiichi, not Kecheii.

I have the Ah! My Goddess movie, so I should know.