|Reviews for Broken Veronica|
| radiate689 9/6/10 . chapter 1
| missshay16 8/30/10 . chapter 3
arent they just perfect for each other.
| missshay16 8/30/10 . chapter 2
someone should put out a hit on Jake Kane. I mean he didnt even apologise for the way he kicked Keith out of office.
| Alece 8/21/10 . chapter 3
Interesting story! Can't wait for more!
| adambrodylover 8/19/10 . chapter 3
Poor poor Veronica! I had tears in my eyes the whole story seeing her pain. I look forward to the next chapter.
| missshay16 8/18/10 . chapter 1
sorry i havent review at all. i jst found out. i moved recently and the internet hasnt been installed yet. so sad and boring. like the story though it was sad keith was dead
| LoVe.always.and.forever 8/15/10 . chapter 3
ahhhhhhhhhhhh love it!
thank you for fulling my need for LoVe!
| Beeski 8/15/10 . chapter 3
Another great story for you! Where do you come up with your plots... Can't wait to see where this one goes, but I really hope you finish off 'Veronica's Second Chance' when inspiration strikes!
| Vmarsfan73 8/14/10 . chapter 3
I love it. It made me cry 3 different times. (
| Riley-the-Sadist848 8/14/10 . chapter 3
Really emotional story. Brings tears to my eyes :'(
As always though, absolutely superb.
| holly 8/14/10 . chapter 3
This is an interesting idea and I'm really enjoying it so far.
I do want to give you a bit of constructive grammar criticism, though, if you don't mind. I've noticed it in all your stories and it doesn't seem like anyone has ever mentioned it, so I figure I might as well. Here's a sentence from your most recent chapter:
"Back Up hearing someone coming raises his head."
The main sentence here is "Back Up raises his head." The phrase "hearing someone coming" is basically a modifier, thus, you need commas around it:
"Back Up, hearing someone coming, raises his head."
This makes it much easier to read and understand. Here are a couple other examples from this chapter, with commas added:
"Wallace, sitting in his mother's car watching, breathes a sigh of relief."
[Here's one with the phrase at the beginning of the sentence-you need a comma after the introductory modifying phrase.]"Totally stunned, Logan says a little wondrously, "I'm so glad I met your dad.""
Anyway, editing is what I do for a living, so I just wanted to help you make your writing even better. I'm looking forward to reading the next chapter!
| starcrazed 8/14/10 . chapter 3
If your goal was to have me sobbing...mission accomplished! Wow, poor Veronica. I'm glad Logan was able to get her to let out some of that pain, he even got her to smile a little. I always love it when Back Up adores Logan :) I'm glad Veronica and her dad already knew about the paternity thing. Wonder what Logan has to say to DK? Can't wait for more :)
| epic sweetness712 8/14/10 . chapter 3
please update soon, i love this story, its completely sad but i just really want to know what happens next. very good with end of the chapter, you wrote really beautifully. good job!
| Dani 8/14/10 . chapter 3
This was heartbreaking. I'm glad Logan could help a little and got Veronica to open up.
| p2880 8/14/10 . chapter 3
This is one of the best chapters you've ever written. I'm in tears. Thank you so much for your superb writing!