I do not get the ending. Did Roxas disappear? How come Kairi doesn't know him? But hey, great story!

Amazing concept. It puts Kingdom Hearts into a much more realistic and disturbing perspective.

I would say that the story was really good but that ending made no sense! I suggest either creating one more chapter to make it clearer or going back and clearing it up...that and maybe making the story a bit longer...You really don't get to see any relationship happen...I mean sure we know that Riku knows Kai but you could add more to show that they were friends or something. There's not enough social interaction between the characters. It's hard to get to know them.

Things are moving fast...maybe too fast...but maybe not.

more!

Fantastic. Now let's see that ending.

I have enjoyed it immensely so far, and I do hope you'll continue with it. Speedily, if possible! This is one of the best mysteries I have read on a site sadly devoid of good writing, a thing which you seem to have in spades. Kudos.

holy balls guys u cant kill the main caharter in the first chappie!

This is perfect suspense. Yes yes yes! So glad I foundt this. Thank you.

WHOA

This is like...KHI! Kind of. In a really abstract way? Still, neat concept. It's smarter than most things I've seen before. I'm still a bit confused, bu totally hooked! Kudos to both of you, and I hope the next chapter comes soon!

It's Riku! :D

okay I have gotten over the Sora thing. kind of. next chapter now!

NOOOOO NOT SORA!

HOW COULD YOU STOP THERE

hhhm. this is moving pretty fast, isn't it? still, i like it. it's def. a mystery anyway, which is more than i can say for about ninety percent of whatelse is on this site.

whoa i have no idea what's going on but it seems cool?