|Reviews for Ogre Battle: March of the Black Queen|
| TW 3/22/13 . chapter 25
Oh, how interesting, how fascinating, how wonderful! I can't believe someone thought to do this - and actually has a chance of doing so! I'm impressed, very impressed. More than that - I enjoyed this immensely. I think one of the most important things for all those who create is feedback, so to break the stillness I'm going to leave you a review. It might be long-winded, but I value text; hopefully you shall as well.
Your novelization does well both in keeping characters true to their inspirations, while not falling into the trap of attempting to keep everything the same as it was. Status quo is a quiet death, and by including references to other realms and possibility, you have created more fuel for future possible works, more possibility than a straight 'x went here, y died, z was recruited' ever could have done.
On that note... My favorite character you've done here must be the witch in pink. It appears that the maxim 'all witches know one another' remains true. So many comments, both simple and multi-faceted... She never fails to bring a smile to my face. Similarly in terms of complexity is that certain knight; whom I never particularly cared for but find myself strangely affectionate to this time, even empathic towards. Less empathic am I towards the seer, and that too is a work of good character-building.
This is in addition to those who are new to this telling. You have a knack for both managing to use concise moments of character building to interest the reader, and capturing the feel - the amazingly epic, yet personal feel - the game did. Though it was not an army I was familiar with on starting this story - I grew to feel as I have known the cast involved for some time. Excellent work.
My recommendations for the day are Drakengard, rich black tea that tastes more bitter than sweet, and dreams without sleep. Your card is the Eight of Pentacles. Should you complete this, I shall be very happy indeed. Should your endeavors turn elsewhere, it has been a pleasure to read this far. All the best, then.
| Spiritblade 1/23/13 . chapter 25
I look forward to seeing the next chapter. You...are doing very well.
| Alastair Bramhall 8/17/12 . chapter 1
Dang it looks legit! There are so many people writing half baked fanfics nowadays it's hard to find a good one, I look foward to reading this although I plan to play the game along with it to keep things real.
| The Ultimate Chimera Bloodline 5/24/12 . chapter 1
Well, well...finally get to see what the first game is about. Only played Ogre Battle 64. Thanks for novelizing this, hope it's good.
| yuukochan 9/25/11 . chapter 23
I'm a brazilian fan of ogre battle, and i just discovered your fic. You made a wonderful history, congratulations!
I was planning make my own version, but i dont have a lot of idea, could you give me some tips?
| Graff 9/4/11 . chapter 23
Still reading, still excellent. Keep up the good work
| Reiko Silveron 8/20/11 . chapter 22
True, concernign the Ivalice connection. I suppose I recalled you mentioning Ivalice, and I knew Tactics Ogre had Zodiac Stones, and that Zodiac Stones were linked with Lucavi/Scions/etc in Ivalice. The connection between the three, makes sense, and yet it wasn't a connection I linked before I read this. The description of the Vanity class, along with demons DOES make it a rather sound connector...considering how the fight with Zalera plays out in Final Fantasy Tactics.
I made the mistake of reading this yesterday before I had to take care of some errands, and so I'm having to hope my review is even somewhat helpful/makes sense, though looking at it now, its grown a bit long...
Antanjyl was well shown still in this chapter, and the shifting of it was an interesting notion to continue observing. Watching the scene with Destin was never a scene I expected to see, but watching it all the same was something captivating as I could only wonder at what the end result would be. I admit, the result that was gained, by far and away, was a moment I won't soon be forgetting. It was written well, and just watching him come to action later in the chapter was awesome. It was like seeing a character be revived in a plausible manner. How you made the entire thing feel believable is something I don't understand, but how you've handled Destin still continues to feel like a believable chain of events. Awesome job.
The fights with both Galf and Gares were also scenes worth reading, and there was never any questioning of either's power. Of the two, I admit I preffered the end of Gares's own, if only becauase it was a culmination of everything that had occured thus far. Of the two, Galf was by far, and away, the one I prefferred because at least he was bound to Antanjyl, a place that might serve well for Gares actually considering all the destruction he's planning.
If, for whatever reason, Gares ever became trapped down in Antanjyl, I could almost see him becoming another Galf, but as they both are, right now it would almost feel more like a Garland-Chaos(FF1/Dissidia) feeling than anything. Galf definitely came across as straight-forward as you desired because he spoke like a ruler who was forced to deal with irritants who he had no reason to fear while Gares came across as a man of arrogance who's power was definitely without question. Perhaps its just how his aura came across, or how he managed the Sky Knights, but he definetly came across as the larger threat. His intent, and the fact that he purposely went against all orders, is like a harbinger of sour news. I cannot foresee him dying now; however, if he did I would have to feel the world itself would be much safer. If he lives through the battle(like he probably will), well that's a future battle, a future attack, that could have an even worse idea behind it. Though I have to question what would be more destructive than his current idea.
Once again you've written a highly interesting chapter to read, and you've done well with the world and the characters within so that even an outsider like myself (Who knows nothing of anything that happened past Avalon except from what I've read here) can connect to. I've always liked how you've used casualties, and how even well-liked characters were people who could die as easily, if not more easily, than other characters. Just another aspect that helps your story remain believable. Well done so far, and looking forward to the next chapter.
| Reiko Silveron 8/6/11 . chapter 21
I know in my initial review I mentioned I was curious to see Tristan, and this chapter more than fulfilled my desire for that, and then some. I enjoyed watching him, from his hesitance, to when he finally took action. The interaction between him and Rauny felt 'right' and I admit I laughed throughout their fight with Apros. I only wonder if Tristan's going to continue to prove so entertaining in the future, but he's definitely himself.
Last note on characters, probably, the introduction of Tristan drove home the point that despite having an army to portray characters for, you've kept each character unique, and that is no easy feat so good job on that.
As to the Zodiac Stone, when I first saw what Apros was doing with it, I admit I was a bit skeptical, but then realized I still haven't actually seen him in that game so I really couldn't say what it does. That, and Zodiac Stones are usually in league with Lucavi or Scions, so really its not entirely impossible for me to accept. It didn't detract from the story in truth, it just surprised me for a moment.
The description of Antanjyl was interesting to truly consider because of how you showed it, and how the group is working together around Desin is something to watch. I admit, I'm curious to see just how Destin continues to grow as the story continues.
Besides for a single typo, you wrote an excellent chapter with your characters continuing to hold the story together. I wish I could tell you on how to improve, but all it seems I'm able to do is tell you which parts I liked, and perhaps why because you're honestly writing an awesome story to read. Keep up the great work.
| Reiko Silveron 7/16/11 . chapter 20
One of the first things that I had to notice was the slightly 'off' feeling of Norn's 'story' though honestly considering she was being the center of attention that's a detail I can understand, but her words did leave me to wonder. Again though, she was out of her element and so her character wasn't quite on que. In other words, it was something noticeable, but understandable.
Lans remains one of my favorite characters, and I recall exactly what was my favorite line as it was when he spoke to Falus and claimed his name to be Lanselot, which was made all the more potent for the conversation he held with Destin as to why he abstained from using his full name.
Back to the review though, his ascension is one that I find to be managed well considering all that you've presented so far and as to why his own is a rarer incident.
I was glad to see I wasn't mistaken on my thought that Aisha's return would be something worth watching, and honestly seeing her and Fubuki rejoin the story made sense. I admit, I wasn't certain that they had found Destin during their absence though knowing they did does at least give the party something more of a chance in the coming struggle.
That, and should they succeed, I suppose we'll see for ourselves just how Destin's love may perform should she ever enter the battle-field. I admit, I hope for the best, though with this story I know casualties are just a fact of the story.
The training parts were well handled as you chose not to remain overlong and possibly draw us into the small miniscule details, but gave us an image of what was occuring. Honestly, even without you telling in the author note at the end, you still gave this image of everyone improving enough because of the words Slust conveyed and the wording you chose to use in mentioning of Rauny training the Valkyries to learn the magics of a Muse.
Which is another thing, having the characters reach a point where they were willing to accept Rauny as their leader and make it not Feel off is an aspect I could not miss. I admit to wondering what Lans Hamiliton would have thought before his ascension should he have returned to meet with them now, though honestly I suspect Rauny to be a capable commander and shall look forward to watching her own commanding of the battlefields, despite requiring a translator.
Lastly, despite my lack in knowledge from the game past the first few chapters I still do not feel as though I am missing out because this story has enough power and enough substance to stand on its own while using the source material, probably, faithfully. A most excellent job.
| Reiko Silveron 7/16/11 . chapter 19
This was another interesting chapter to read, and seeing how the rebels took to the sky islands was fun, especially watching Canopus come to deal with the heritage of his clans. I like how you manage to write out your interactions in a way that feel, as if there's a strong flow. You never make the reader think, 'this doesn't feel quite like a conversation should' and as my last review implied I appreciate that in a story.
The battles with the sky knights and Rashidi were well handled.
As to the questions of favorites.
My favorite character in this, having to think because I like how Destin continued to grow and change throughout the course of the story, but I don't believe that set him as my favorite. Honestly, I believe Lans Hamiliton would be my favorite character because of how his character also, perhaps it was because he was consistent to himself despite growing a bit as the story continued. Him waking up is something I intend to watch since the general concensus makes that a curious thing, and I've enough faith in your writing to trust it to be a reason I can accept. After him, perhaps Bors or Canopus.
As to favorite line, there has been no end of great lines from most characters though because of circumstances over this last week I admit my memory of most are rather foggy. The scene I keep thinking on though in the first few chapters when Ara begged Destin for help, perhaps the line I'm about to quote wasn't one that lasted lone, but the consequences of his choice was one to be felt much later.
"No. No more tears. If not him, then someone else. But it was he who was here now, inciting hundreds into violence. And he would not permit this war to kill one person more than it had to. Getting to his feet, he took her hand."
As to favorite villain? Hm, Rashidi is a pretty evil and powerful guy with his own motives and so far he seems like a well thought out character, but I admit to liking Hikash. He's a father, a deva, and one of the strongest, and most capable, men to serve as an antagonist though Kaus was a man I found very well portrayed and another capable antagonist. But again, Hikash is my favorite so far.
As to viewpoints, so far I'm satisfied with those you've chosen to portray, I admit I was curious about Emily's lack of portrayel though that made this chapter's events come as a surprise, which is never a bad thing. Perhaps more viewpoints from Ara if it could be done, though honestly I suspect you know more about whom you need to portray to show what point. Though I admit I'm rather curious as to where Aisha went now, and rather anticipate when she and her Paladins come to call again, even if Guildas and Mirdyn aren't serving as parts of the main cast. Though once Tristan joins the cast of rebels, I admit I am curious to see his viewpoint.
| PsychoDude 7/16/11 . chapter 20
I'm speechless, I've been staring at the screen, with my hands in the keyboard for at least 5 minutes trying to come with a way to describe how I feel about this chapter...
It's made of EPIC WIN and AWESOME!
But I don't think that's enough of a review, so I had to go back to read the whole chapter again and take it a little bit slower.
So Lans is an Angel Knight now? I remember those from Tactics Ogre (the one for the GBA I think), and they made great weapons... good times, but I'm getting sidetracked, I like the fact that Lans got an upgrade and it gives me some hope to maybe see a pumpkinhead or halloween, what do those two have to do with Lans being an Angel Knight (because he IS, right?)? Nothing at all, just the fact that we get to see a new 'class' (even if it wasn't in the original game/storyline, or at least I think it wasn't).
Considering my last review, you should get a good idea about my take on the whole sacrficing-Deneb-deal/thing, I don't really remember much about Antanjyl, I just remember Galf and that the Brunhild was involved... I kinda wonder if I'm spoiling the story with my reviews... I guess I should stick to reviewing what had already happened in the story and not what could/would happen in the future.
One thing I really like about this story is the way Destin handles things, how he can adapt, just like he 'infiltrated' and learned the 'ways' of the Necromancers, that was a nice touch but I wonder how much have(had?) he learned during his 'stay' with them.
It almost slipped my mind, did Lans used that name on purpose, or did he made it up on the spot, because it sounds familiar... and I guess I'll just shut up about it.
While I loved this chapter and I think it's Epic something tells me the next one will be even better!
Keep up the awesome work.
| Reiko Silveron 7/13/11 . chapter 18
Afraid its been quite some time since I posted a review, so this one could begin to ramble and extend for a time as I'm also attempting to grant a review of the eighteen chapters I've finished at this point.
This story has proven to be a very fulfilling read, and I appreciate all of the work you've done to continue it up to this point. The characters in this have proven themselves interesting, and none seem too, off key. In other words, despite all the power you granted to Destin, it never felt unwarranted because of how he and the other characters reacted to him, that was truly the key to why I loved this story.
I admit that I've only played some of Ogre Battle, March of the Black Queen, perhaps only a few maps here and there, and so I cannot know just what part of the stories you've drawn from the game and elaborated on, and what parts are your own devising, much to my own regret. The telling of the stories though has been well done, the whole matters involving Yuria, Canopus, and Destin was also well done.
The pacing of the story feels great, and the use of the tarot stories at the beginning of each chapter feels like a nice touch, and despite what's happened I suspect that's our best way of knowing about where Destin stands or will occur to him as the chapter progresses. May be wrong, but that is what I suspect at this point.
How you've handled the setting is also well done, you've kept all of the factors handled. Like them spitting to keep back evil, I would never have thought of that, never knew of that. Its that, and a lot of other little things that kept the 'world' itself intestesting to read about. Each progressive area has come with its own unique little points and that has also been a point to help.
Another point that takes into account all I've wrote is that you never forgot you're writing about war, and so death and love both have accompanied matters fairly. I admit that losing characters was something I was searching for as I began to read for without those, I suspect I would not have been quite so appreciative of the work, but the fact that you allowed for death, dealt with it with all of the characters. It was yet another point to be impressed with.
This story, again, has proven great to read, perhaps throughout the length of it there were a few typos here and there, but honestly I could count them for the entire length of what I've read with both hands at most, and for all of the pages and chapters you've posted that's acceptable.
I wish you the best of luck as you continue with it because this is definitely by far a story worth keeping up with.
| PsychoDude 7/5/11 . chapter 19
Another great chapter, I love that you somehow manage to make this story more interesting and epic with every chapter.
To answer the questions from the last chapter:
Favorite character? Deneb, why? (you didn't really ask, but I still feel like giving a brief explanation) because she's kinda crazy (childish/spoiled? or pretends to be), not really sure why but I like that kind of characters.
Favorite chapter? Hard to tell because every chapter seems better than the last one, however I really liked chapter 16.
Favorite line? (kind of a long line so I'll just put the 'punchline') "...or the Flying Spaghetti Monster." - Deneb
Most despicable villain (hopefully by now there's a lot of candidates for that honor, not just Rashidi)? Albeleo... because he is an asshole, I mean Rashidi is kind of an asshole too but in a 'better (almost likeable) way'
I was wondering about a few things such as:
What are you going to do with the 'Fool's travel' once you are done with the Tarot Cards, because I think/hope that there are going to be at least a couple of chapters after 'visiting' the 22 Cards, right?
Are you going for an official / Tarot Card (after expanding on it considering how much detail have you put on most of the characters) ending or a new one?
And there is also the whole deal involving Galf...
What about Destin, Deneb and Lans?
I know you'll end up adressing those questions at some point but... The suspense is killing me!‼!
Once again, thank you for writing this story and I look forward to reading more of it.
Keep up the awesome work.
| Graff 7/4/11 . chapter 19
Another excellent chapter. Regarding your note at the bottom I was actually hoping you'd do a Destin/Rauny story, so I like that she's getting some extra attention even if you aren't going that route.
Nothing to add other than that really; very well written once again.
| PsychoDude 6/27/11 . chapter 18
Another great chapter, it keeps amazing me how you manage to make this story more epic with every chapter.
On the other hand... I hate the cliffhangers! well not really but I hate waiting for the next chapter, anyway.
Keep up the great work.