| Reviews for Words Left Unspoken |
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Xirysa 9/15/10 . chapter 1I'M HERE. I'M REALLY AND TRULY AND FINALLY HERE AND THIS IS KIND OF IRRELEVANT BUT I WAS EXTREMELY CLOSE TO WRITING THIS REVIEW IN FRENCH BUT WHATEVER. Gonna be honest, but at first I didn't realize that the italics were what he wanted to say until I got to the end. XD That's called fail on my part, my dear. But, wow. I mean, really. I love pieces like this. (But you already knew that.) Oh, goodness. That bit with the reference to Elbert's death? Bittersweet and amazing with a hint of awesome. Just the way I like it. Maybe it's just me, but I think that after right Kent or Lyndis, you do a superb job of writing Eliwood. And why do I feel like any story surrounding Eliwood is fraught with tragedy? Poor man. But it does make for a great plot device. C: Uhh. Yeah. I have to go to class now. Great job once again! [Xirysa] |
Mark of the Asphodel 9/13/10 . chapter 1Artful and poignant. A solid concept and a fine execution thereof. Though I admit the middle section confused me just a little until I realized it was a regular battle scene and not the "accidental death" scene. Loved the line about Elbert's smile. |
EthelBertie 9/11/10 . chapter 1Coming up outta nowhere to say: Well... that was a heart-clencher. Words unsaid are always so tragic. Personally, I think this is the only way Eliwood and Ninian would NOT have worked. 'Cause, in the game, they have a bond regardless of supports or not. I like the way you used italics to place what could've been said - just to, you know, emphasize your point. Aaah, makes me want to smack them both upside the head. Just some (tiny) catches grammar-wise that I could pick up... ("Let me see," the young woman said. "Get out of my way. Go help where you're needed. I've got this.") I reckon it should've been "Let me see." because you started the next part of Serra's speech with a capital. ("Goodbye," he said.) I was just wondering why there was a comma there. Was he going to say anything else afterwards? 'Cause it would've felt more final with a full-stop. But yeah, great job with this drabble. The greatest thing about this was that you brought home the message of regret so hard. Like, punch-in-the-face hard. Which is good. |
Trevor X 9/10/10 . chapter 1 Nicely done! I didn't expect the goodbye in the end, though in retrospect I can see how it all led up to the farewell. (Plus the title should have clues me in.) Good to see a creative spark alive! :-) |