   nonhalema 1/14/09 . chapter 1aside from gramatical misakes its very good writingg |
| Laurie Jupiter 7/28/06 . chapter 1 This story has potential but the grammar is a major yuck (sorry to say). |
| Paulina 11/15/01 . chapter 1 Oy vey, the grammar... the spelling... if you fixed it up, put in the missing words, maybe it'd be a decent story... |
| 9 4/11/00 . chapter 1 I would have given it a 10, but there are a few errors(spelling/grammer. |
| Hellcop 6 4/11/00 . chapter 1 Not bad, but the grammar is truly sorry. |
| Jedi Princess 10 4/11/00 . chapter 1 Major up the good work! |
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